The five senses (Larry Stylinson AU)

The five senses (Larry Stylinson AU) Sight

Sight

He waits for the bell to go, leaning back against a pillar in the hall, which he seems to shrink into whenever someone walks by too close.

He lets his eyes wonder around distractedly, but whips his head around at the sound of the familiar laughter, eyes focusing on the dark brown hair and wide smile.

The boy is walking with his friends, and Louis instinctively knows that he's not the only one watching, because everybody is always watching him, eager eyes greedily watching the boy even when he so much breathes.

Louis wonders if they see the same things he does, the way he's polite and friendly and always willing to help, how guilty he feels whenever he has to let a girl down easily, brows furrowing and lips pursing when he sees the disappointment in their eyes, how he's actually slightly clumsy whenever he's anywhere but the football field, how that lazy look he wears sometimes doesn't mean he's tired, but just content.

His eyes linger on his back as they walk away, and he sees the way Harry stops, hesitating before looking around. Louis melts back into his wall of comfort and he watches as Harry looks over him, not noticing the hiding boy before turning back to his friends and walking out.

Louis feels that familiar sensation wash over him: relief and disappointment swirling together low in his stomach, causing his shoulders to slump with some form of invisible burden. He understands of course, that Harry, just like everybody else, doesn't see him, and that's okay, kinda. Louis never expected anyone to notice him, so it wasn't a surprise when they didn't, he'd stopped feeling upset about it years ago. It's just a bit different with Harry, because he can make Louis feel things twice as strongly, he wants so much to be noticed, to be seen by Harry...In fact he wants it just about the same amount as he dreads that miracle ever happening.

Unlike Harry however Louis sees him, sometimes it's like he's all he ever sees. It's not like he's a stalker or anything it's something a bit more subtle; he'd just happen to look up every time Harry entered a room or walked past him. His eyes would just instinctively find him (even if Louis wasn't looking for him). It had been like that for years now, and today was no different.

"You're not very subtle you know" Zayn tells him, later that day.

They've stopped by Zayn's locker so he can get his books, and Louis looks up at him startled.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you're not very subtle when you're staring" Zayn wiggles his eyebrows at him jokingly, but Louis only shrugs, "it doesn't really matter does it? It's not like he even knows I exist."

"And who's fault is that?" Zayn asks shutting his locker.

"Universe's" Louis says flatly as they start walking towards their class. They have English this morning, thankfully. Some times Louis wishes that was the only lesson he had to go to. He likes English, and he likes reading and he likes analysing and he could go hours doing just that.

"No it isn't, you've liked him for years, you could just go and talk to him you know, it's not forbidden or anything." Zayn says, bringing Louis' attention back to him.

Louis rolls his eyes, "I know that"

"Then why don't you?"

"You know why" Louis says quietly ignoring the sad look Zayn's giving him.

"You can't hide from everyone forever" Louis ignores that too, moving around the still empty classroom to get to his seat right at the far corner of the room.

That wasn't necessarily true either, Louis thought, it's not like he had been hiding exactly, he just...hadn't made himself noticed. It came all too easy for him, staying in the shadows, and most of the time, he liked it there better, was more comfortable without people's attention on him. So what if there were those short moments where Louis fantasised about being noticed by Harry? He'd just shake his head at himself at the ridiculous notion because even if he did notice Louis, he probably wouldn't like him, and Louis would just end up embarrassing himself. Being invisible was better than being embarrassed any day.