As the cherry blossoms fall

Ocean Eyes Filled With Tears

Giyuu hated the color blue.

He hated it for a lot of reasons. But one stood out and was the biggest reason for the hate. It was because it was the color of his eyes. The same eyes who had witnessed the death of his friends Sabito and Makomo. Who couldn't do anything but stare when the demon killed them in front of him. The same eyes that had witnessed the death of his sister and he couldn't do anything but stare.

He couldn't do anything right. He couldn't even talk in public correctly even though his family were known talkers. He was truly worthless and just a waste of oxygen. There was a tree out there that was working hard to provide oxygen for him that he didn't deserve. He was wasting everyone's hard work.

He doesn't deserve food, water, or oxygen. His friends would have been great and better demon slayers then he ever would have been. His sister would be married to the love of her life and would be happy. This all could have happened if it wasn't for him.

He was in his house when the thoughts started. When he was in the midst of the thoughts he caught himself going to the bathroom. When the thoughts finished he noticed he was holding something. He was holding a razor. He turned around and locked the door. He didn't want anyone to walk in.

He rolled up his sleeve instinctively. He had done this so many times it had become second nature. He chose the right arm this time since it looked bare compared to how many scars and fresh cuts on the other. He still had scars on this arm but not as much compared to the left.

He put the blade to his skin. He decided to take one cut for everyone that died for him and for everything that he hated about himself. This was because he wasn't expected to be anywhere. He wasn't that big of an idiot to do so much if he had to be somewhere. Especially as a fake hashira.

Sabito, one, Makomo, two, Tsukato, three, people he couldn't save, four, five, six, his eyes, seven, the fact that he couldn't stop his uncle,eight, that he isn't social, nine, his arms for doing this and being so weak, ten, eleven, twelve.

And so on until he reached fifty. The fiftieth one was for having so many things. He looked down and saw his arm covered in blood. He stood there shocked. He snapped out of it and started to clean his arm with water not caring if it stung because he deserved it.

He got a bandage after and started to wrap it, thankful that he didn't have any kakushi watching over him. He put his mismatched haori back on. He took it off early not wanting for any blood to get on the precious fabric.

"Caw, caw, Giyuu Tomioka is required to be at the hashira meeting at 3:30 pm! Caw, caw." His crow called from a nearby window.

He looked at the clock and froze. It was 3:20 and he couldn't walk there in the time he had to run. But if he did run he would probably pass out due to blood loss. Plus he also was already feeling dizzy. He could not show up in general but then he would be wasting everyone's time and his crow said he was required.

Damit

He thought as he decided to run. If only his crow had been there a few minutes earlier. On that note he needed to look into retirement plans for his crow.

He was about five minutes from the meeting. When he got there he noticed he was the first one there. He was confused. He looked at a nearby clock that read 3:25 so he was there five minutes early which didn't explain why no one was here. He looked around and saw a nearby kakushi.

"Hey you, what time is the hashira meeting?" he asked. The kakushi seemed confused by him talking to him.

"It starts at 3:45," the kakushi said, still looking confused.