Broken (on hold)

My first!

I looked over at Keiichi. He was siting next to me, in a dark room! Wouldn't you consider this a date? I mean because we're seeing a movie together!!! He suddenly catches me staring at him and I blush and look away. This is my first date!! None the less a date with a guy I don't even know!!! I slide down in my seat and try to watch the movie. Something touches my hand and I look over to Keiichi. Is he trying to hold my hand?! His hand locks onto mine. Gah!!!! My face heats up. He smiles at me. Not good!! NOT GOOD!!! I swore I'd never be like this with another guy! Those who bullied me because I confessed my feelings to a boy I thought I loved!! I swore that I'd never do that again, I'd never fall in love with another boy so long as I live!! But... Keiichi is nice. I didn't confess my feelings to him yet he's here with me, watching a movie, and holding my hand!! CRAP!!! This is a date!!!! I need to get out of this situation! I can't be doing this!! Wait... I didn't confess so that would mean-! That would mean-!!!!! We're not actually on a date!!! He never said he liked me he just said he wanted to be my friend! And besides... I never said I liked him or wanted to be his friend so... So this definitely isn't a date! Huh?! Wait... then why is he holding my hand!!!!!!??? Gah!!!! I pull my hand away and he looks down at me shocked. "What's the matter was I holding your hand to hard?" He asks. My face heats up. No!! Stop that stupid emotions! I feel nothing for him! He's a boy who I've randomly met!! There's nothing going on between us. "Uh... I-it's just..." How should I say it?! I'm so confused! Wait... If I tell him what I'm thinking will I be rejected again?! My eyes widen. I... I CANT LET HIM KNOW MY FEELINGS! Even if we're just friends, once I tell him how I really feel, he'll desert me just like when I was young... I look away. "Oh, I'm so sorry, your nervous aren't you?! Sorry I didn't realize that you probably haven't held hands with a guy for awhile, huh?" He chuckles a bit before smiling down at me. My eyes widen in surprise. "I'm so sorry, I wasn't considering your feelings at all!" He added. Eh?! H-how can he... How can he say that... He's acting like it's all his fault... maybe he's not like every other guy I've met. Maybe he's not the type to reject me if I tell him my true feelings... can I seriously trust this guy? M-maybe... maybe I can try... he did say we're friends, right? "No... I'm sorry... I-" Can I tell him the truth? Of course I can!!! We're friends now!! "I was a bit nervous to be honest but I understand now... we're friends... right?" I look up at him to see him staring down at me shocked. Eh?! Was I not suppose to say that!? Crap. My face heats up from the embarrassment. "I-I'm so sorry!!" I rush out. I get up to leave but he grabs my hand and pulls me back down. "No... we're friends..." He says smiling at me. I gasp. H-he's... he's so trusting.... and understanding... he's so... loving... wait what?! No silly me... this is what friends do, right?! "Hey, be quiet you love birds!" Someone whisper shouts. My face heats up. Love birds!!!? Eh!!!!!! "W-we're n-not a c-couple..." I whisper back as I scratch the back my head in a nervous attempt at trying to explain things. They just glare at me and continue to watch the movie. To be honest I haven't been able to watch the movie very well due to the fact I've been freaking out about holding his hand! But now... here we are... sitting in a dark room together, holding hands, and watching a movie. Is this how it's like to have a friend? Someone who you can share your time with? Huh... I... I think I like it... My face heats up as I look over at Keiichi. Thank you Keiichi... After the movie Keiichi decided to walk me home. I agreed but wasn't to sure if I should have. "So did you like the movie?" He asked. I looked up at him and nodded. He smiled. "Well that's good!" He then looked ahead as we kept walking. "So... how come you hate people? I mean when I met you you clearly stated that you hated everyone..." He said. I glance up at him to see him blushing. I blush myself but decide it couldn't hurt at least tell him something. "It was a long time ago... in elementary school I attempted to confess to a boy but everyone called me a freak and said I wasn't allowed to be with someone as poplar as him so they took to bullying me..." I state. "After that I guess I just decided to block everyone out- no wait! After my mother died is when I really started to ignore everybody! That was during my fist year of junior high..." I mutter. He suddenly stops walking. Huh!? Did I say something bad?! "Keiichi?" I ask. He frowns. "I had no idea that had happened to you... I'm so sorry..." I shrug. "It's no big deal... it was just my escape, I thought that if I didn't have to worry about if people liked me then I couldn't get hurt..." I state. We finally getting my house. I sigh as I look up at Keiichi. "This is my house, thanks for watching the movie with me!" I smile at and start to walk away when he pulls me back. Suddenly his lips crash against mine and my eyes widened. I quickly push him off of me and stare at him dumbfounded. "Masumi?! Sorry I just thought it was the proper thing to do after a date, you know?" He blushed a little and looked down. I touched my lips in confusion. He was my first date... he took my first kiss!!! I held hands with him! I held hands with a guy (other than my father...) for the first time!! My blush spread immensely. "You idiot! This was my first date!!! You took all of my firsts!!!" I shout angrily. He looks up at me surprised. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to take them!!" He panicked. I sighed and looked down at the ground. "Well... at least it was you and not some pervert..." There now maybe he won't feel bad... I really do suck at talking with people!!! Suddenly he smiles and ruffled my hair. "Good then see you around, Masumi!!" He shouted as ran off. I stand there dumbstruck. I... I think I'm starting to like this Keiichi... Dammit!!