Depression/Anxiety/ Bi Polar... Everything

One

My biggest fear is that eventually you will see me the way I see myself

You don't get it okay, it's not easy for me to explain but I'm not trying to be lazy it's just that I'm so fucking tired and I have no motivation to succeed and I don't even know why this life is happening to me
(I actually do I'm a fucked up person)

And the worst part it... No one knows how close I am to drowning

I am good for awhile, I'll talk more, laugh more, sleep and eat normally, but then something happens, like a switch turns off somewhere and all I am left with is the darkness of my mind but each time it seems like I sink deeper and deeper and I'm scared... Terrified that one day I won't make it back up, I feel like I am grasping for air, screaming for help, but everyone just looks at me with confused faces wondering what I am struggling over when they're all doing just fine, it makes me feel crazy...

She was like the moon, part of her was always hidden away

I don't blame anyone, I did this to myself, it's my fault, Everything is my fault

Trust me I know how it feels. I know exactly how it feels to cry in the shower so no one can hear you, and waiting for everyone to fall asleep so you can fall apart, for everything to hurt so bad you just want it all to end, I know exactly how it feels.

I keep a lot of shit to myself because in reality nobody really gives a fuck

-go do things
No
-they're important
No
-I'm serious
So am I
-get up
No
-why not
I hate myself too much
-that's ridiculous
I know

She says she's fine but she's going insane, she says she feels good but she's in a lot of pain, she says it's nothing but really it's a lot, she says she's okay but really she's not

Saying to someone who has depression: "what have you got to be depressed about? You have a great life" is the same as saying to an asthmatic: " what do you mean you can't breath? There's lots of air"

She didn't know who would leave or stay, so she pushed them all away

I don't think people understand how stressful it is to explain what's going on in your head when you don't wen understand it yourself