Depression/Anxiety/ Bi Polar... Everything

Two

Roses are red, violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet and perhaps so are you,
But the roses have wilted, the violets are dead,
The sugar bowl's empty, your wrists are stained red,
The sun isn't shining the sky isn't clear,
There's no silver lining cause you're no longer here,
Rain keeps on pouring there's no end in sight,
You're laying there frozen so far from the light,
Your beauty's unreal your smile the sun,
But time can't be turn nor actions undone.
The words that you wrote that only I read.
"I love you so much; please don't cry when I'm dead"
A bond that we formed, A love that ran deep,
A pain that we shared; a friend I could keep,
I wanted to hold you, wipe the tears from your eyes,
Been there the moment you said goodbye.
I want to forget but most times I don't.
I want to let go, but I know that I won't,
Tears on my face, memories burned in my head;
The roses have wilted, the violets are dead.

When you're a cutter you notice different things,
You notice how some people only wear long sleeves and pants even on the hottest days of summer.
You notice the red cuts when bracelets slip down in class.
You notice people's empty eyes and the way they tug away when someone grabs their arms. And you glance around the room looking at people's wrists searching for scars, just like yours.

Then you wake up and you want to die

Her eyes, they used to shine so bright.

Every time I close my eyes it's like a dark paradise

You cannot destroy me, I destroy me

"Are you really okay?"
I am actin like I am okay. Please don't interrupt my performance

If you can't wake up from the nightmare maybe you're not asleep

Stop asking if I'm okay, I'm tired of lying

Everyday it gets harder,
Everyday it's like a nightmare progressing on,
Everyday is another prayer echoing from my bones asking God to take me now,
Everyday I close up more.
Everyday it gets more impossible,
Everyday I feel myself die some more.
Everyday I lay on my bed wondering how I'll leave this hell,
I've never felt so much pain
((Bullshit yes I have))

The urges came back,
I'm feeling the darkness consuming me again,
And it hurts,
I thought I would beat it this time,
But I didn't
I am not strong enough
I never was.

I don't feel anymore,
I used to be sad now I'm just numb

There's a reason why I keep it all inside

She wanted to be a pretty girl

Voices in my head say "you need to be dead"

Damaged people are dangerous, they know they can survive

This year I wished I was dead, and they all clapped without knowing

Hello darkness my old friend, I have to talk with you again

I'm so sick of speaking words no one understands

I hurt and I cry, but you can't see the desperation in my eyes just because I smile

It gets worse at night when I'm alone

You can say sorry a million times, say I love you as much as you want, say whatever you want, whenever you want, but if you're not going to prove the things you say are true then don't say anything at all, because if you can't show it, your words don't mean a thing

Dying, she gives her last little smile to the world that has been so unkind

You save everyone but who saves you?
((I felt really selfish writing that :( ))

"Angels can fly" she whispered as she jumped

I wonder how long it would take anyone to notice if I just stopped talking