The Bodyguard (discontinued)

47.

Think this is the one of the best chapters so far, hope you enjoy <3

The shock came and went, but Jasper still couldn't find the right words to say. Ace was fierce in his voice — brave for coming here at all. He stepped inside before Jasper had the chance to shut him out for good.

"There is so much I want to say to you," Ace said, peering down at Jasper, his gaze constant, reassuring. "Most of all, I need to say I'm sorry. I need you to believe me when I say that."

Jasper had backed away only a couple inches, hesitant to stay put. It had been so long since they were this close. So long since he had peered into Ace's eyes and saw everything and nothing at the same time.

The distance between them had been just as physical as it was emotional that Jasper didn't know any different. But now, Ace stood before him like he was ready to surrender everything.

Now, Jasper could feel Ace's body heat and it was as if he could go the rest of his life without feeling the sun.

"You can't be here."

Jasper breathing was soft, steady, yet the pattern of his heart beat was anything but.

"Why?"

"Because there's so much I want to say to you."

Had he known, he could've been more prepared. He hated being blindsided — hated feeling out of control. He could kick him out. Jasper could toss him to the curb like the guard did to him only a night ago.

But what good would that do? What would making Ace feel like he did did do for either of them? Hadn't they done enough, to each other?

"Then say it."

"I can't. I don't have the words right now. You didn't give me enough time."

Jasper didn't feel like putting up his usually cool, collected front. Ace had completely blindsided him, and Jasper couldn't hide it.

"I can leave. Just say the words. I'll go."

"Stop," Jasper said shakily. "You know that's not what I want."

He didn't want to be weak, he wasn't weak, but Ace had the unique ability to alter his judgement. He'd altered his mind long ago; by now, it was too far gone.

"What do you want?"

"I don't know. Everything I want I can't have."

The suit Jasper wore from tonight was digging into his body and he was acutely aware of the fabric on his skin. He felt everything with stunning accuracy, including the way Ace inched closer.

"That's not true. You can have me."

"I can't. Not really."

Jasper backed away, only for Ace to follow. They were further into his home now, standing in the middle of a living room that was hardly lit. Jasper had the chance to study Ace.

The way his dark hair fell on his forehead, the sincerity in his eyes, his posture confident, but hesitant all at once. He was waiting to Jasper to take the lead-- to let him in completely.

"Okay," Ace nodded. "Then we'll pretend. Pretend just for now."

Jasper take a step back. This time, Ace doesn't follow him.

"You said I wasn't worth it. You meant that. Did you have a change of heart, in what? A day?"

Jasper's voice, sharp and pointed, still dripped with an edge of heaviness. Ace didn't know what to say at first. He worried at his lip with his teeth, until he felt the capillaries burst, blood rushing to the surface.