It Wasn't Just You

4.) I've Got You

"AH!" Ryan flung up from the bed a sweaty mess. Min's eyes shot open and he quickly sat up facing his friend.
"Ryan?!" Min called worried. Light shone onto Ryan's face from the room's window. Sweat dripped down his forehead and his hair was a tangled mess. Ryan didn't respond to his friend. He sat wide eyed staring into his lap as he breathed frantically.
"Ryan, are you okay?" Min placed a hand onto Ryan's shoulder in which caused him to tense up. He slowly looked over to Min whose expression was pained and full of worry.
"Min.." Ryan mumbled as he started to cry.
"Hey, hey! It's okay. You're okay." Min gently took Ryan into his arms. He patted Ryan's matted hair and massaged his back. "I've got you.." Ryan held on tighter as Min's voice vibrated through his body.

"I've got you."

That's what Min had said while they were on the train. Even though Ryan had gotten him stuck on the train, when Ryan was about to fall Min took his hand, caught him, he was still there for him. Even though Min was angry with him he was still there. No matter what.

"I'm so-sorry, Min.. You w-were right... You were right.." Ryan sobbed into Min-Gi's chest. Min had wanted Ryan to admit that he was wrong but not like this. Min felt like he was going to throw up.
"Ryan, don't apologize, please.. I should've came with you. It wasn't just your fault. I should've never left you alone." Min held onto Ryan tight, as though he'd lose him if he didn't.
"But th-that-... I'm not your responsibility!" Ryan pushed against Min who wouldn't budge.
"Yes, you are. We're each other's. We've cared for each other since we were little! Now that we're out on the road together, we still care for each other! There's no one else to!" Min spoke louder, but still, his voice kept it's softness.

It was quiet now. Ryan had stopped fighting Min and he just laid against him.
"I'm sorry for pressuring you into keeping the band going." Ryan struggled to breath once he finished.
"Ryan-"
"I've been selfish. You told me back on the train.. This is what I wanted, not you. But you still left everything behind for me- for this band. Heh.. I mean can you even call it a band? It's just us.. I..." He paused. "I just-.. I don't wanna be alone." Ryan managed. There was silence for a moment before the other spoke.
"I don't want to be alone either." Min admitted. "And I lied back then."
"What?" Ryan peered up to Min.

"On the train, Ryan. Of course I wanted to do this with you. Music has been both of our dreams since we were little. I was just scared to stand on a stage and perform but you're the one who got me out of there, out of my "shell" or out of whatever's been holding me back for so long." As Min spoke Ryan could feel tears of relief creep up. "I think to a certain extent we've both been selfish and stupid.. we're not perfect. You should know that better than me. You make a mistake on stage and you keep going, that's just the kind of person you are. Don't beat yourself up over my choice. I wanted to perform with you. I always have." And with that Ryan had started to full on sob. He covered his face with his hands.

"R-Ryan?! I'm sorry! did I just make it worse?!" Min pulled away from the embrace so he could get a good look at his friend. Min took Ryan's hands and lowered them.
"I-I'm fine.. G-God, this is embarrassing.. I'm usually good at... not getting all emotional.. hahah..." Ryan squeezed his eyes shut and wiped his tears. He set his arms aside and yet tears continued.
"I cry in front of you all of the time, there's nothing to be embarrassed about. Plus, what happened to you last night.. Ryan." Min raised his hand to Ryan's face and wiped his remaining tears. "It's okay." His voice so careful as to not cause anymore tears from spilling. Ryan's face was hot and he wasn't completely sure if it was from the night before or from Min's hand that ever so carefully grazed across his cheek.
"You're feverish. You should take another shower before we go. I'll bring you clothes from the van." Min lowered his hand and got out of bed. He headed to the bathroom to get ready. Ryan sat still on the bed, his heart racing.