Red White and Black

Chapter Two

Sadie

Sadie wiped the beads of sweat from her forehead then tried in vain to peel the saturated shirt from her back. With the sun beating down like a hammer on the rusting and pitted roof of the ancient sedan, it hadn't taken long for the interior to turn into an oven. An air conditioned car was a luxury only white folk could afford and she doubted she'd ever be able to scrape together enough money to buy one. She barely had enough to keep this old heap running and full of gas.

"Thank you Jesus, for providing this car," Sadie prayed out loud, then added under her breath, "Although you could'a easily made this day a little cooler, now." Keeping one eye on the door of the administration building, she shuffled through a stack of mail, hoping there would be something other than bills. "Lord, them bills just a keep on a-comin' like they's no tomorrow. Heaven forbid I live at least one day without gettin' a bill!"

The door to the admin building swung open and Sadie breathed a sigh of relief when she saw Markus. He struggled against the door as if it were heavy as stone. He should've been flying down the stairs but instead, he trudged along with his head hung low, moving liked he was mired in molasses. Something ain't right, she thought. A wave of panic washed over her and she fought to maintain a neutral expression, knowing that no matter what had happened, she needed to be strong for him. But the weight of being strong for Markus exposed the very weakness she had always tried her best to keep suppressed.

"Lord, I am tired. When is someone gonna be strong for me?" she said, not even realizing she had spoken aloud. "I am tired of the disappointments and the pain, of the constant worry of how to provide. When is it gonna be my turn to lean on someone?" A tear threatened to escape her eye as the car door opened and Markus slid into the seat.

Summoning a hidden strength, she forced those bitter thoughts into retreat and dredged up a smile. "How'd it go Lil'M?" She reached over and squeezed his shoulder, already able to tell the worst had happened.

Her concern grew while Markus sat silently and stared off into the distance. Talk to me, Lil' M. Let it out. The muscle in his jaw worked and she could tell he was gritting his teeth, a habit he had developed about the time he quit wearing diapers. His tension became contagious and Sadie forced herself to breath deeply and remain calm, realizing if she got upset it would only make matters worse.

Markus finally sighed. "Well, Aunt Sadie... looks like my life has gone off track."

"Tell me what happened. Don't this man know how good'a player you are?"

"This man ain't interested one bit in how good I can play," said Markus, his voice dripping with acid. "He don't even really care about basketball. His only concern is keepin' the right color balance. And that balance is all white."

Sadie sat speechless for a moment, trying to understand if she had heard correctly. She'd grown up in Memphis, experiencing a lifetime of discrimination, injustice, and even fear because of the color of her skin. Sadie knew the score. She had already felt the pain of isolation and rejection when a white employer took advantage of her. She knew firsthand the humiliation of being forced to live on welfare because no one would hire an uneducated black woman. She had stoically endured an endless barrage of cruel jokes and cutting remarks, not to mention the long list of slurs; all designed to beat her down and keep her in her place. She knew all about the unfairness life was constantly putting in front of her, because she lived it every day. The hurt washed over her like a tide, threatening to pull her out into the deeper and more treacherous waters of despair caused by the reaction to the color of her skin. She knew from experience if she drifted out there, the old bitterness and anger would surge to the surface leaving her unable to help Markus.