valley of lies ;; park sunghoon

chapter 11;;

"angel..?" i slowly approach her.

she slams the journal shut and holds up a hand. "don't." she then turns to me with eyes that hold the upmost betrayal. she's even starting to cry. "how could you, sunghoon?"

"no, y/n, you don't understand-"

"i was just a bet? i was just a game to you?"

"no!" i protest. "no! it's not like that at all!"

she shakes her head in disappointment. tears roll down her cheeks and i want so badly to reach out and wipe them away but i know i shouldn't. how did she even find that fucking thing?!

"all of this over a stupid bike?! i can't believe you've been lying to me this whole time!"

"i haven't! i love you, y/n, that's real!"

she stands up and crosses her arms over her chest. the way she's looking at me right now actually hurts. i can feel her gaze piercing my heart. "really? because according to your dear diary, you never cared about me at all. i was 'just some girl who'd instantly fall for you'."

"y/n-"

"so all of this," she gestures between us. "all of this was a lie?" her voice cracks toward the end of her deliverance.

i reach out for her. "y/n, no, it wasn't a lie! not the whole time!"

she shoves me away. "you lied to me! i thought.." she attempts to hold back the waterworks but ultimately fails. "i thought i could trust you."

"you can trust me!"

"clearly not! i gave all of my love to you, i shared a night with you, and all of it wasn't even real! i- i just- i don't-"

"it was real, y/n, i swear! i really did fall for you!"

"i can't believe i was so naive! i was a fool for falling in love with you, i know that now."

my eyes start to burn as salty tears escape. i don't remember the last time i've cried but i know this time is the worst. "please, angel, just listen-"

"you don't get to call me that anymore." she looks at me with the most heartbroken eyes i've ever seen. she takes off her promise ring and throws it into my blankets. i gasp as she does so. "fuck you, sunghoon!"

"i-" i can't get any words out. she's never ever ever sworn before. not ever. it's not a sin, but it sounds so wrong coming out of her mouth.

an angel like her shouldn't be using such foul language. unlike somebody like me. a fucking stupid idiot who just ruined any fucking chance he had with the love of his life. what a fucking god damn idiot. she's right. fuck me. what the fuck is wrong with me?! fuck, fuck, fuck.

"i hate you so much. go to hell, sunghoon."

i sniffle. i can't quite tell but it feels like i'm crying more than she is. "y/n, please. just let me explain. it did start out as a bet but-"

"well, you know what? congratulations." she begins gathering all of her things from around my room. "now you get your stupid bike because i was stupid enough to fall in love with you." ouch. that stings. she pauses before pushing past me. "goodbye, park sunghoon."

i quickly grab her arm. "please don't go." i beg.

"why?" she snaps as she brushes off my touch.

"because my life without you is a misery that's not worth living. can't you see it? look into my eyes, y/n. my feelings for you are so beyond real."

i see her falter for a quick second but she catches herself. "i don't trust anything you say. never talk to me again. i hate you more than anything in this world."