bloodsucker | eren jaeger

invisible string

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

flashback 3: invisible string

eren's pov:

the years following my mother's death were dark. i was still a kid; glimpses are all i can remember. when my father turned; a cult formed around him. ranked with blood purity, and kept in line with blood lust. the cruelty in which he killed his own wife is what kept his followers loyal. but the first death i have memory of seeing isn't my moms; it's hers.

humans were easily drawn in by my fathers charm. if he himself wasn't convincing enough; the draw of prolonged youth and improved abilities was. but with a system in place that kept vampire bloodlines clean, these people were set up for execution. free fodder for the loyal followers.

at age ten, grisha declared i was fit enough to join 'the society,' he called it. i already knew what he was; what zeke and i would become. but they were whispers. i never saw anything concrete until that day. i don't remember what was in front of my eyes, but i remember the screams from the execution line. screaming from the venom coursing through their veins, changing them. it had been easy to forget my fate until then.

their shrieks of agony were easily drowned out by the squelching of their throats being slit before they could turn. maybe there was a time where i remembered the images clearly; but they are dark and blurry now. most of my memories are like this, except the first woman in line, clutching a photo with her hand as it went slack with the loss of life.

that's the only image i can remember clearly. just a girl and her mother. it was the price of humanity my father was ending. their faces forever burned into my mind.

zeke was exposed to everything five years before i was. he wouldn't be turned until he reached eighteen, but there was already a change within him. the brother that would console me, and take the brunt of our fathers anger was gone. he was the spinning image of him now. i learned quickly to camouflage in false commitment and adornment to the cause. i stood by as my father and his followers committed atrocities; refusing would be a fate worse than death.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"why are you crying?" a few minutes had passed since i threw historia off of me; both of us regaining our breath. i don't even know who's room this is, my shoulders lightly shuddered at the thought. historia got on my nerves easily, but it was rude to leave a girl crying.

"god! sometimes i just cry!" she pouted, voice rising in anger. why you should just leave a girl crying. even after months of sleeping around with her, i knew next to nothing about her. i'm sure the same applies to me. she turned to the side, back facing me now. the phone screen lightly lit up her side, grabbing my attention. i didn't really look at what she was doing; my peripheral told me she was just scrolling through pictures.

getting up to leave, i pulled my shirt back onto my body; my eyes locking on the screen when it passed over my head. "who's that?" the question left my mouth before i could register that i was speaking. i knew who that was. the girl in that photo. it looked like a few years of time had passed, but i would recognize her anywhere.

the revelation blocked out anything historia might've said. my head was throbbing; i didn't know how to feel. i saw her mother get murdered, and i've been sleeping with her friend for months? the thought that we have been indirectly close to each other made my skin crawl. how am i supposed to feel? i had never thought about what i might do if we ever came into contact. the idea seemed so far from ever being a reality; that i never considered it as a possibility. but now, i had to.

her voice slowly drew me out of my own head, "i didn't mean to, really. i dont know what the fuck i was thinking with porco." porco? who was that? maybe we weren't as connected as i once thought. but that's a good thing. this girl had already gone through too much at the hands of vampires; i needed to keep whatever distance we had in place. especially when the day that i turn comes... it would be any day now.

"it really was a mistake-" she cut herself off with increasing sniffles, "god. the look in her eyes. i knew y/n would never forgive me. even if she did, we would never go back to before. so i lied. i let her think i hated her the whole time. that i was manipulating her. and thats why i'm here. i should be at princeton. fucking princeton!! but i wanted to go to sina with her. everyone thought she loved me more than i did. but that's not true!" fuck. and now i knew her name. the feeling of being connected to her was overwhelming.

it was hard to wrap my head around the story with my mind running miles. "you can just transfer back to princeton. you have the money. no big deal." i sighed. i didn't want to listen to her pointless girl problems. not when they didn't tell me anything relevant about the girl who's face had been etched into my mind for years.

"no. this is my punishment. it was my fault. it was me who started hooking up with porco. i deserve to watch her be happy without me." historia's sniffling were echoing through the room; heard even through the loud muffled behind the closed door.

it was the last time we ever hooked up. i made a promise to myself that i would keep my distance from her when she eventually transferred to sina. if she did. after marco.. the best thing i could do was stay away.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

staying away is easier said than done. even with her attending sina, i had the upper hand; i could check who was in the class before it started, and i had already been gone for a year. i was sure she already had her group of friends; and she would stick to that just like everyone else here did.

how quickly everything came crashing down on me. she was the first person i laid eyes on in that stupid fucking literature class. my eyes always seem to be drawn to her. and now my body was; i felt no control over it as i walked myself over to her; sitting down. fucking idiot.

the scent of her blood wafted towards me immediately; but it was easy to ignore the urge. at least i can control the bloodlust easy enough. it was quickly followed by another scent; one that wasn't hers. a trace scent that was embedded into her clothing. my body's innate reaction was to take care of whoever the scent of malice came from, but i knew that would only cause more harm than good. getting involved in her life; even if i did it carefully.

the class continued like it would never end; my nose was overwhelmed with that scent; taunting me. you have to do something! i didn't even look at her. i couldn't; i was already too attached. i didn't understand how this could've happened. my mind was at war with itself, leaving my body to act on its own. i shoved my phone into her before i could realize what i was doing.

getting her phone number was the least of my worries. i could've dropped the class, but i quickly found out how pointless it would be. discovering how embedded she was with my friends was the cherry on top. i knew it didn't matter what i did; my curse would invade her life even further. i had failed.

but if i already fucked it up, i could still do something about that god damn scent. it was at the party. in the basement; it intensified when she was on jean. initially i figured it had to be coming from him until the fair. the time bertholdt ran into her. it was then that i realized his scent was everywhere she went. it wasn't just on her clothes; he had been following her around.

even after cleaning up that mess; i was faced with the reason i had to stay away from her. her mother. but that crashed down too, when i realized she had no clue her mom wasn't even alive. when y/n said the word 'left' and not 'died' i knew any barrier i tried to build would just come crashing down eventually. just like every one so far. i was totally fucked, and so was y/n.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

a/n: sorry for the short chapter; i'm very excited for the next two though ☺️