Rinharu romantic fanfic

Insecurities

Rin

They sit one beside another, looking at the sea. The sound of the water.... So relaxing. Rin thinks how beautiful his life is. How much he has changed. Haru saved him.He gave him reason to do what he loves again.  He looks to Haru. His face so calm and beautiful. He wishes that Rin himself could make Haru this calm, this beautiful.. But he doubts that Haru would show this face to anyone else but his beloved sight of water.

"Why it has so much impact on him? Why am I getting jealous? But I want him all to my self. I want to be his reason for being happy, calm, angry... Am I asking for too much? It's like sometimes he can't even see me. Sometimes he just wanders to his own little word and I can't get in no matter how  much I try." Haru doesn't move. He's staring at the view. He is so focused on the sight that Rin is wondering if he even remembers to breathe.

"I don't want this. I want us to be one. I love the Haru that loves the water, that loves swimming but when I look t him sometimes , like this time, I wonder if I will ever be something important in his life. He has never looked at me like that. Why must I be second to his heart?" These toughts are eating him inside and he finds himself breathing heavily.Haru doesn't even blink. He doesn't hear him. He's not with him.

Haru

He slowly grabs Rin's hand and just holds it. No talking. He closes his eyes and takes a long breath. He wants Rin to enter his mind right now, to feel what he feels...  "I am cold." Rin says. Haru is waiting for Rin to come closer, to feel his warmth and feel safe and home, but Rin stands up and walks away.

Haru is watching him as he is drifting away from his sight.  The same feeling... Everytime Rin leaves.. He feels dry, dehydrated...

Rin

He hears the splash of water and he feels his heart break a little bit more...