One Of The Girls - The Weeknd, JENNIE, Lily-Rose Depp.
I think I feel too much. Over analyze the simplest things. Take most things to heart. I think somewhere in between those lines, I ended up finding comfort in my sadness. You experience it so much to the point that, it becomes a known feeling.
Learned how to hold back my tears, no matter how big the discomfort in my throat would grow.
"Sadness is a weakness." Was what I would hear every day.
My father used to kill bugs in front of me when I was six. He thought it would make a tough exterior, and create a strong character. Safe to say, it didn't toughen me up.
Him fighting with my mother did.
Seeing her helpless, made me want to just run there and make them stop fighting. Like I could've even done anything. So, when I used to cry for her she'd say, "Never waste your tears on people who don't deserve them, bambina."
So I guess there's no valid reason for me to feel hurt that Alessio's been ignoring me for the past week. Always missing dinner, coming back home late. If he was fucking some girl, he could've just told me so. I'm not going to push him off a cliff.
Maybe I would.
He's not mine to begin with, it doesn't make sense.
Anyways.
I decide to meet up with Mila, and catch her up on everything possible.
"Maybe he's building a mansion for you?" That was Mila's response to me telling her about him ignoring me.
"I wish." I huff out. "He's probably fucking some girl for all I know, which is fine, he could've just told me." I say bitterly, not liking how the words play out on my tongue.
"You would have him tell you that he's sleeping with another girl, rather than just letting it be?" Mila asks, not expecting my answer.
"Yeah. Then I wouldn't have to find him with another girl in bed." I shrug my shoulders.
"Speaking of another girl, what's up with Eva?"
Ugh.
"I honestly don't even know what I'm doing. I'm helping my husband get back with his ex. I always said I'd marry for love and nothing else. Alessio is someone I'd never marry." Goosebumps trail against my skin, the fall breeze with a mix of realization hitting me.
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