10/9/23 :: I love cold metal against my skin, I love cold hands against my skin, But the things I hate against my skin are, my tears, my trust, my jealousy, my hatred, my love, and my kindness.
Don't hurt me and I won't feel like walking on egg shells around you, you can't buy my trust you earn it; of hard work; I hate trust it ruins me.
Don't hurt my heart and I won't hurt yours, don't feel offended by my out of hand comments. Don't make fun of me and I will cherish you.
My lungs save air for the breath I once needed, but my heart won't save space for your trust, my brain won't claim my hate for you but my heart will, my heart won't keep your kindness, unless it is reserved.
My love is reserved for one person only, and that person only but unfortunately I lost it, I lost my bsf, I lost my comfort, I lost my trust, I lost my dignity, I lost my heart, I lost the one and only person who can truly heal me, there is no fixing it now, once my heart, my brain, and my lungs have lost all hope.
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11/25/23 :: Once upon a time I would wish for a different life, a different me, a different human, but that won't help, no matter the kind of human you are, you will always hurt, you will be forever in pain, sometimes it's fixable and other times only you can fix your pain.
I hate hostility I hate being rude but I am still that way, why? You must ask, well I have a feeling that maybe if I'm more hostile with myself, everything will be fixed, or maybe if I just died, everything would be okay.
Dying won't do anything but make other people suffer, but that's not always the case, as soon as you die, they have pity for you, not guilt, not love, not kindness, something only can be shown with passion, affection, empathy.
