Larkspur Lane - HS

Rockland

Elodie James

Following behind Harry I can't help but pick at my nails. A habit I've had since I was a kid. Even though it's been five years and so much has changed, Harry still feels like my Harry. He smells the same, he carries himself the same, from what I've gathered, his values are still the same. 

He's just taller with longer hair and has an incredibly intimidating aura about him now. 

This should be easy peasy. Pfft. I can totally do this, we're just catching up. I'll just pretend like everything is totally fine, I mean I literally get paid to pretend and I'm a great actor. Oh god, do you think he's seen any of my movies?-

"Oof." I bump into his back, not realizing we had already reached his store. 

He turns around to steady me, "You alright?" He looks me up and down, his eyes lingering on my lips. 

His gaze sends a shot of warmth through my veins, the embarrassment from slamming into him certainly not helping the flush of my cheeks. 

"Sorry. Wasn't paying attention..." I laugh nervously as he continues to guide us through the shop. 

"I love it in here by the way." I compliment softly, relishing in the way his shoulders drop at my words. He's always cared too much about what other people think. 

"Yeah? Thanks." He scratches his neck, I have to force myself not to stare when his shirt lifts up revealing his hip. 

He got more tattoos.

His tattoos were always one of my favorite things about him, I don't let myself think too long about it, the guilt of not being around to know he got more done and their stories washing over me. 

He clears his throat, "So I uh, don't have to open for another hour if you wanna sit in the back?" 

I perk up at his invitation. I figured I should go at his pace, he really doesn't owe me anything so the fact that he even wants to talk at all is something I won't take for granted. 

"Yeah of course." I follow him into the back room, sitting on a long green couch. "Um, I know we have a lot to talk about but before-"

"Elodie." He shakes his head. "Just let me- give me a second okay?" He sits next to me, closing his eyes and releasing a breath. 

"I still can't wrap my head around you being here." He says quietly, eyes still tightly shut. 

I frown, "I didn't know you were still here." I say back just as quietly. 

At my words his eyes flutter open and he tilts his head towards me.

"I thought you were going to Oregon State-"

"Well, I didn't." He cuts me off, his voice tight.

I swallow, touchy subject, noted.

The room fills with silence, as I watch him closely. The sleeves of his shirt messily pushed up his arms. The scuffs on his boots. The curl of his hair. I can't remember the last time I got to look at him this close. 

I wish I could hug him.

I blow out a breath, "I need to apologize to you." 

He blinks, then nods his head hesitantly.

"I don't have an excuse really. I should have never treated you the way I did, you didn't deserve that. I was a shitty friend and an even shitter girlfriend." I shake my head with a scoff, "I was barely even a girlfriend. I regret it all so much. I cared so much about what everyone in school thought of me and I was stupidly selfish. I was so focused on getting out of here and proving to everyone I could do everything they never thought I could that I just left you in the dust. I left everything I've ever loved for nothing. I'm so sorry Harry, I don't expect your forgiveness I just needed you to know how much you meant to me, I'll never stop being sorry for it."