best friends? or not.

- 1

it's now my one year anniversary of being friends with san, we decided to go to an amusement park to celebrate at night time. we rode the rollercoasters - half of the time me clutching on to dear life on san - and it was pretty fun. after that we decided to check out the games and play on them, unfortunately san won basically most of them but at least i won two! (san actually decided to take it easy for him on the (two games).

we stayed there for another hour playing games, walking around, gone to cafes and trying to get plushies out the rigged machines. it was an exhausting day but we wanted to go on the last ride to finish the day off - the ferris wheel.
"hyungg" i whined, "hurry up! we can go on the ferris wheel now!"
"young-ah i'm getting my phone out wait a min-"
i cut him off by dragging him on one of the available carts. we sit down and i finally looked at him while having a big smile on my face. uh oh, he's glaring at me.
"no patience i see." he says while raising an eyebrow at me.
"yup" i say while he sighs at me.

i then flinch at the sudden movement of the ride, it starts moving up slowly.
"san-ah! it's moving!" i say excitedly.
"yes young-ah i know."
then it stops. 'huh' i thought. "why did it stop?" i ask.
"i'm pretty sure so other people at the top can stay there for longer." san replied.
"whatttt, that's no fair." i pouted.
"woo young jagiya, we will have our turn alright?"
"ugh okay." still pouting.
it starts to move again and stops for the other people at the top, after a few minutes, we finally reach to the top.
"SANNIE, we're at the top!" i yell.
"yes jagiya we are." he replied.
"come on let's take pictures." i sat next to him and pulled out my phone then loaded on to the camera app. the first picture i stuck out my lips to a pout while san just put his thumbs up with no expressions on his face. the second i did a wink and did an upside down smile (hopefully you guys get what i mean 😫 ) while i put the peace sign up and san just copied me with the peace sign as-well.

after a thousand pictures we both looked at the view.
"it's so beautiful." i exclaimed.
"hm it really is"
after 30 seconds of staring into the view, i turn around and catch san staring at me with a different look i've never seen. "san you alright there?" i questioned with a giggle. he then grabbed my hand and said.
"jagiya, you know that you're really beautiful."
my heart fluttered out of nowhere, why would he say that? "o-oh thank you, that was a bit sudden though." i joked. that look. what does it mean? he keeps on staring at me like he's looking at the love of his life, well i don't mean that i am the love of his life.

the crate tilted and started moving. un expecting
that, i stumbled and fell on sans lap, my head leaning on his chest. i looked up and saw his gaze on me. those damn intimidating eyes always gets me. "s-sorry i didn't mean to-" he then lifted my chin up with his hand and leaned in. i gasped.
he then suddenly stopped. "s-san, what are you doing?"
"nothing, nothing i'm not doing anything. just admiring your face."
i nodded, words not being able to come out. and then we both realised that the ride had finished and we now had to get out. we stepped out and started walking to sans car, in an awkward silence.

we reached sans car and got in, saying nothing to each other. he started the car, driving to my house, still, not saying anything to each other. 'what the hell was today?' 'what was he doing.' 'why did he do that?' my range of thoughts made me overthink, did choi san do that deliberately or was it the heat of the moment? my thoughts were soon interrupted by the car stopping. i stole a glance to him and saw him clenching his jaw, what is up with him? i thought.

"bye san, thank you for today." i said while looking at him seeing if he'll look at me back.
"yeah bye." he said coldly. i closed the car door and once i reached out to my keys i heard the car engine reversing to leave, was he seriously not going to wait for me to get in the house. like he always does?

i stepped in my house and warm air surrounded me. i quickly ran upstairs to my room and jumped on my bed, not bothering to change my clothes. tears gathered up in my eyes, what is going on today? he didn't even say goodbye. i wondered. i pulled up my blanket to cover my whole body and hoped that i would quickly fall asleep to leave this heavy feeling. but my overthinking thoughts seem to ruin my plan. that night, i fell asleep after 2 hours of thinking  about him.

-
-
-
-
-