I'll never trust again

Sometimes

Sometimes i wonder how you felt after it
Why did you say it
Or why did you cool it?
Sometimes i wonder if your friends made you do it
If they found another bride
Or you felt like...
Felt like being drowned
Did you hear the sound?
The sound of sirens
Waiting for our last pass
They knew our love wasn't gonna last that

I always thought i was easy on you
Never jealous
Nor angry
The girl i thought i can be
Though i just didn't want to live through
The fights
The argues
The screaming
The fall throughs
I hear my parents' everyday go-through

What did i do wrong?
I'd ask myself constantly
Didn't show enough interest?
Or give you the monthly imprest?
But at least i tried
Maybe you tried too
Maybe i just didn't notice
Because i was too blinded
But by what exactly?
The boredom?
The disinterest?
The ignorance?
The 'hey princess' ?

You promised it wouldn't change
You promised you'd come
you'd text
you'd love
You promised 'it isn't just a fling'
And everything would be again spring
But it wasn't
Nothing was the same after that day

Now i just walk past you
Take the longer trail
Just to miss your way
Just to miss the awkward silence
As I walk past
The person in whom I looked for my guidance

But i still see you in my dreams
Or accidentally on the streets
Than I look away
Cause I'm too afraid
If i see you plain
I'll find my new cocaine
And fall in love again