House of Cards • a Matty Healy Fanfiction

Chapter Two

It was already six and I hadn't showered yet. I had no motivation to go to this party, and the only reason I was going is so Jess didn't look bad in front of her ex. Somehow everything ends up being about Jess.
I finally got up to shower, I slowly walked over to the bathroom. I took off my shirt. His
shirt. I took off my sweat pants and turned on the shower. Cold. My showers were always cold, because I felt like I needed to wake up from something. I washed my hair then shaved my legs and that was it, I never cared much for long routines.
Once I got out I looked at my bare body in the full length mirror. I wanted to cry every time I looked at my body. Short, I thought. Fat. I hated it. I hated how much I hated myself.
"Make it stop," I whispered to myself, fighting back tears.
I slipped the same shirt over my head and pulled my wet hair back so I could do my makeup. I didn't do too much, just some mascara to make my green eyes pop and some dark red lipstick. I wanted to cover my whole face up, but I was too tired, even though I had plenty of sleep. I was too unappealing to anyone to even try.
I took my hair out and blow dried it which took forever considering it's length and thickness. Then I walked over to my dresser. This would be the hardest part. I never knew what to wear, nothing ever looks good on me. After about thirty minutes I chose a navy blue dress that was tight at the top but went out at the bottom. I paired that with black babydoll heels, the only pair of heels I owned because I've been clumsy since birth.
I looked at myself up and down. I didn't look bad. I was me.
Suddenly my door was open and Jess came in to hug me. She looked like a model, long legs, skinny waist, just everything, and it broke my heart every time I looked at her because I wanted what she had.