My one and only ocean eyes 🌊

Match day-1/ confessions

Alessia's POV
I've just woken up to Lucy's alarm I must of fell asleep on her last night or something because I'm in her bed and I'm now laying on top her I'm not complaining though because she's really comfy I sat up slightly to see the cutest sight I've ever Pop seen she's wrapped her arms round my waist so I can move. I took a moment just to look at how fine she is I guess I never looked at it that way I tried to shake the thought out of my head I can't be gay my dad would kill me. I'm not even joking my dad is super homophobic and although he's been there physically he's never been there mentally he always favoured my other siblings more my mum tries to say I'm just overthinking but when you can't even have a proper conversation with him without brining in your siblings you kinda get the idea that your not very liked. That's why every time I get asked whose my favourite mum or dad I say Nan and grandad my Nan and grandad is my everything although I don't tell her how my dad is I can always talk to them my nans always hugging me reassuring me and I give back to her when I'm round hers I do all sorts of bits for her round the house. When my grandad use to take me to football training I could tell him all the drama that's happened at school he always seems to agree with me. Anyway after my deep thought I decided it was time to get up I carefully shook Lucy to wake up."Lucy Lucy Luce wake up we have training and if you make me late I'm not going to be happy" I said trying to put on a tough voice. She chuckled and opened her eyes and said" your too cute that threat defo made me get up"with sarcasm. I pouted she just pulled me in for a hug and said"sorry babe but your just to precious to be scary". My pout soon disappeared as she promised she'd give me cuddles later we got up and got dressed.Actually forgetting to take my meds I was just in such a good mood about training. We made our way to breakfast I grabbed a plate of bacon sausage beans and toast I always get asked the question where's the eggs but I absolutely despise them the texture and the smell and taste put me right off. I also grabbed a bowl of fruit consisting of pineapples strawberries apples and grapes. I made my way over to a table which had Ella Georgia Leah keira Katie z and Lucy I sat next to Lucy and across from Ella we were making small conversation about our games at club and the game tomorrow. All of sudden I started to worry that my dads going to find out Im gay when I was in the shower today I thought long and hard about and came to the conclusion I like girls I like a girl Lucia Roberta Tough Bronze the way she comforted me last night just melted my heart she's so caring. My leg began to shake my heart was racing there was a ringing noise but I weren't quite sure what it was I could feel a panic attack coming I excused myself from the table saying I need to go to the toilet before training. I thanked the chef for the food and quickly made my way to the toilet I leant against the sink trying to regulate my breathing but it didn't seem to work I couldn't stand no more I leant against the wall for some assistance but not managing to stay up I slid down knees to my chest tears streaming down my face my breathing loud ragged and heavy. Head in my hands I thought this is it I'm gonna die either way either right now or if my dad finds out I'm gay.

Lucy's POV
We were all eaten out breakfast when I saw less's leg shake as if she was worried she soon excused herself to the toilet taking her plate of food up which she had barley touched. I saw almost run to the toilet I decided to go check on her since she didn't look well soon and she really didn't look okay. I made my way to the toilet and as soon as I walked in the sight I saw made my heart shatter the beautiful blonde was bawling on the floor her head in her heads tears streaming down her face. I quickly clocked she was having a panic attack I've had a few in my time being alive. I carefully made my way over to her and wrapped my arm round. I whispered sweet nothings to her telling her to breathe. I pulled her shaking body into me putting her hand on my chest and said "do you feel my heartbeat just follow that you going do good" "in 123 out 123" I kept on repeating those words until I felt her relax she was still shaking ever so slightly with tears in her eyes but her breathing was at a normal pace. She soon realised what had happened and got all embarrassed. "Look at me less I know your probably feeling embarrassed right now but there's nothing to be embarrassed about I myself have had panic attacks before loads of people I know" I said trying to comfort "do you think you could tell me what got you so worked up" she took a deep breath and stuttered "I-I d-d-don't know I-if I can s-say it h-here" I looked at her she looked so fragile. "How about we got to our room sarina told us that our training session and game is being cancelled due to the weather and we are not to leave the ground until it is safe"I said she nodded I began to pick us up from the floor wrapping an arm round her waist just to be sure. As I opened the door to our room I walked less over to my bed and placed her down she looked exhausted we didn't have to do anything for the rest of the day apart from gym later on. I turned all the lights off shut the blinds and lit a candle to make her as comfortable as she can be. I told her if she wanted to get changed she said yeah but she's to tired I said would she be okay if I changed she said yeah but all her pyjamas are shorts and strap tops so instead I put her in my t-shirt which was a bit oversized on her and a pair of my bottoms and a hoodie as it was quite cold we got into bed and she began to talk. She told about all her problems with anxiety and how she's sensitive to noise and certain stuff how she she figured she likes girls well a girl which I really hoped was me but I didn't get my hopes how she's scared to tell her family because her dads extremely homophobic and she's always been treated differently. After she vented to me i told her how proud I was and if she didn't want me to tell anyone I won't she said if that's okay and I said absolutely. " so whose the lucky girl" I said trying to humour up the conversation she began to blush and said " if I tell you promise you won't think of me any different" I held my pinky out and said " pinky promise" we locked fingers and she said " I don't know how say this b-but I-it's y-you" I never smiled so bright she let a massive breath as if she was holding that in for some time. " I like too lessi" I said smiling from ear to ear. " really?" She said unsure if o was telling the truth "really". After that we began to talk about how's this going to work we decided to only tell our close friends like Leah Ella Georgia keira Katie and that we're gonna take it slow we're not in a relationship yet but we're not just friends.