COLOR RUSH || TAEGYU

CHAPTER XVII

At some point during the night, Beomgyu had gotten out of bed, because when he woke up the next morning, he found himself on the living room couch. The sun had barely started rising, so the sky was still slightly dark.

His head was pounding. He made his way to the bathroom and glanced at his reflection. His eyes were tired and puffy and his face was tearstained. He splashed some cold water on his face, attempting to wash away the evidence of his sorrow.

He didn't understand why he felt so affected by his parents' death. He had never met them and had been in Seowon's care for most of his life. But for some reason, the moment Seowon told him the news, something in him broke.

He felt a sense of longing and sadness.

As he returned to his room, he found his phone on the floor and powered it back on.

Floods of messages and missed calls came through. Some of the messages and calls were from Taehyun, but most of them were from Huening Kai and Soobin.

He started to scroll the messages, managing a soft smile as he read the messages Huening Kai and Soobin had spammed in their group chat. As he scrolled through Taehyun's messages, he suddenly remembered that they were supposed to call the night before. Beomgyu quickly sent him a message.

Hey, sorry about last night. Something came up. I have to leave later today. I'll see you in a couple days?

There was no response. Beomgyu didn't expect him to respond right away, it was barely six in the morning.

He went back to the comfort of his bed and pulled the covers up to his neck. He stared at the corner of his room, the corner he had made his art studio. All his paintings and supplies sat there, just as he had left them the night before. His eyes landed on the painting of Taehyun that he had just finished.

After spending some time focusing on himself, all he wanted was to be comforted by the other boy. Taehyun had started to trust him enough to be vulnerable with him, and Beomgyu wanted to be able to do the same.

Taehyun made him happy. He made him feel whole. Beomgyu felt a pang of disappointment in his chest just thinking about having to spend days without him.

But there was something that bothered him.

If his adoption was closed, why did the adoption agency contact Seowon in the first place about Beomgyu's birth parents? Wasn't the whole point of a closed adoption to maintain privacy? It just didn't make sense.

Beomgyu lay in bed, the weight of his thoughts pressing down on him.

There was a gentle knock on his door.

"Beomgyu?"

"Come in," he said. His voice was hoarse.

The door cracked open, and Seowon entered with a comforting smile. His eyes held a mixture of worry and concern.

"I thought you might want some company," Seowon said, taking a seat on the edge of Beomgyu's bed. "How are you holding up?"

Beomgyu sighed. "I don't know, Uncle. It's just... everything feels so confusing right now. I never knew my birth parents, but I feel so much pain. So much grief."

Seowon moved closer to his nephew, pulling the boy in a hug. "Loss is never easy. Your feelings are valid, Beomgyu."

Beomgyu nodded gratefully. Seowon held Beomgyu in his arms a little while longer.

"We should get packing. You'll need some time to get settled before the funeral, so we should leave tonight."

He let Beomgyu go, patting his nephew's head and ruffling his hair.

"Do you need help or anything?"

Beomgyu shook his head, smiling softly. "No thanks, Uncle. I just want to be alone for a little bit, if that's okay."

"Alright, my little tiger. If you need to talk or if there's anything I can do, just let me know. I'm going to go buy the train tickets."

Seowon patted Beomgyu's head once more before he got off the bed and left the room, gently closing the door behind him.

Once he was alone again, Beomgyu took a deep breath, trying to steady his thoughts.

He tried to distract himself as he started to pack up his things. He needed enough to last him a coup le of days, but he didn't want to overpack.

He made a mental checklist, trying to figure out exactly what he needed and what he couldn't last without for a little while.

Clothes. Phone charger. Headphones. Toothbrush. Toothpaste. Sketchbook. Hairbrush.

There was probably more, but he could figure it out while packing.

As he started gathering his things and placing them in his duffel bag, his thoughts finally began to slow down. About an hour and a half later, Beomgyu let out a deep sigh as he finally zipped up his bag. He glanced around his room, taking in the surroundings of his safe space. The room felt strangely empty even though most of his things were still there. His eyes briefly glanced at the painting of Taehyun again.

It'll be fine. He'll be fine. It'll only be a couple of days.

Taehyun needed time to rest, Beomgyu thought as he tried to justify his leaving so suddenly. He had been working himself too hard during his color rushes.

I'll be back before we both know it.

Beomgyu quickly changed out of his pajamas and into a pair of blue jeans and a white t-shirt that he paired with a brown jacket. He looked at himself in the mirror as he put on a black mask, feeling at ease when he recognized his reflection. His outfit was comfortable enough to last him through the three-hour train ride from Seoul to Daegu.

He grabbed his bag and left the room, heading to the living room where Seowon was on the phone. He could hear snippets of the conversation along the lines of work and that he would be unavailable for the next few days. He placed his bag on the floor by the couch as he made his way to the kitchen, realizing he still hadn't eaten breakfast. He wasn't too hungry, so he grabbed a plate of apple slices from the fridge and ate a couple as Seowon finished his phone call.

"You ready to go, Beom?" Seowon asked, standing up from the couch.

Beomgyu nodded, feeling a little anxious. What if he had siblings? What were his relatives like? Would they accept him as one of their own? He knew going to Daegu would be challenging, but he hoped being with Seowon would make it easier.

Beomgyu grabbed his duffel bag and Seowon's suitcase as they left the apartment. Seowon had called a taxi to take them to the train station. As Beomgyu loaded their things into the trunk, Seowon gave him a gentle smile as he squeezed his nephew's shoulder reassuringly.

Beomgyu knew he couldn't do anything about the past or the future. All he could do was focus on the present moment and take things one step at a time. He put his headphones over his ears and leaned his head against the window, allowing the steady hum of the car to soothe him as he got lost in his music.