Jingle Bells Ball

JBB: 02

People tell us that this time of year is jolly and filled with happiness. Let me correct them. They're wrong.

Or it's just me.

If there is an almighty powerful entity out there, then he hates me.

I managed to steal...I mean, borrow a map from a news agency store. I was going to return it. Maybe not yet, though. I also might've borrowed some cash from a kid too.

Hey, it was for a good cause. The bus costs money, you know.

Anyway, using public transport is my favourite thing in the world. I just enjoy making people around me feel uncomfortable. Usually, they would make rude comments regarding my hygiene, or lack thereof, and that's entertaining for me. Seeing the look of disgust is a beautiful feeling. 

Which means this ball is going to be amazing!

Free food and a chance to steal cash? Some expensive items, too? What more could a girl possibly ask for?

So, after making my way down the aisle and to the exit of the bus, I couldn't help but notice how the driver covered his nose when I passed. So do you know what I did?

I let my gas flow free.

A rumble from down under.

By that, I mean I left the bus a Christmas present, one which I'm sure would linger in the air for a while. Judging from how people were coughing when the bus drove off, I'd say they fucking enjoyed my gift to them.

"You're welcome!" I curtsied to the vehicle. Turning around, I quite literally felt my jaw drop to the ground. "Why, hello there," a grin spread across my face.

Before me, there was a street sign.

Blackhill crescent.

Strange though, why is there but one house in the entire street? A building built like a castle.

Okay, it is actually a fucking castle! The person who lives here must be—well, shit, could it be that guy owns it? If so, then he must be loaded with money.

Megan, Megan, Megan, you've hit the jackpot tonight.

I found myself whistling as I made my way towards the enormous building. The road curved into a U-shape, and at the top of the curve stood a grand entranceway with large gates that looked like they belonged to a castle. As I got closer, I noticed the thorny details of the gates. They were made of iron with designs of vines and leaves woven into them. The structure beyond the gates was immense, and I couldn't wait to explore it or, rather, steal from it.

If it were not for a tiny problem.

The gates were closed.

Luckily enough, at the far side, attached to the stone wall, was a speaker. Approaching it, I scratched the top of my head.

How the heck do these things work?

There's no button.

Do you just talk into it?

Is there a hidden camera?

Um...

Lifting my hand, I waved at the brick wall. It didn't return the gesture. How rude!

I leaned forward so that my lips were almost touching the black box, and sucked in an enormous amount of air and... "Hello! Is anyone there!? Can. You. Hear. Me?"

Judging from the gasping within the speaker, someone heard. "Ma'am, please step back."

Smiling ear to ear, I did as instructed and moved back onto the road. "Is dis alright?"