Lunar Flare Book 1: Crimson Moon

Chapter 10

Beowulf had been hesitating outside the door to the infirmary for several minutes. He had come here for a reason, he had planned to speak to Thedrick because he knew this was where the jester was hiding from him, but now that he was here Beowulf's resolve had faltered. He remembered the look of Thedrick's face the last time he had seen him a few days ago, the expression of absolute genuine terror. Beowulf knew if he went in then that was probably the way Thedrick would look at him again, that he would scare the jester with just his presence. He must be terrified of Beowulf to stay hidden away for so long.

Of course, Thedrick's fear was entirely Beowulf's fault, and well warranted. Beowulf had tried to kill the small man, and had he caught Thedrick before he reached the protection of Balthasar, the soldier probably would have gone through with it. In that moment Beowulf had thought he was doing the right thing, and it had all seemed so simple and straightforward to him.

He had all but fully confirmed that Thedrick was a vampire with his various tests, proving his mother right. And Beowulf's understanding was that vampires were evil, which was supported by his mother when he had gone back to see her after he started to believe what she had said about the jester. She had pushed the wooden stake into his hands and reassured him that the creature needed to be destroyed.

It was Beowulf's job, after all, to keep the king and queen and the people of their kingdom safe, and a vampire was a threat that needed to be dealt with. His mission to destroy that threat was righteous, or so he had thought. He had spent a good while psyching himself up, strengthening his determination and preparing himself for any mind tricks or manipulation that the vampire might use against him to weaken his resolve. Beowulf had conditioned himself into not thinking of Thedrick as a person, but as a monster, and pushing to the side the feelings he had been developing for the jester.

But everything Beowulf had thought had been shattered by Balthasar's stalwart protection of the 'evil' creature. The chirurgeon's forthright and logical arguments had caught the soldier off-guard, causing Beowulf's determination to waver, and snapped him out of the hunting frenzy he had been sucked into. The way the vampire had clung to Balthasar like a scared child had dumbfounded Beowulf, and then the way Thedrick had looked at the soldier with such fear had struck his heart with unexpected pain.

Beowulf had plenty of time since then to consider all that Balthasar said, rethink his whole understanding of the situation, and for that image of Thedrick's terrified face to haunt him. Now that he wasn't driven by obsession to expose Thedrick's true nature and then 'destroy the evil', he could actually slow down and think things through properly.

And, during this time, Beowulf was confused to find himself missing the jester. He tried to shake those thoughts away, to remind himself of what Thedrick was, but they kept coming back to him unbidden. His mind would wander back to the moments of holding the little jester in his arms, of kissing him tenderly, and his heart ached.

Time to think did a lot for Beowulf's ability to accept this new information about Thedrick, and to realise what he had done. Thedrick may be a vampire, but he was still very much a person, clearly not some mindless monster. Beowulf had gone from holding him gently one moment to trying to kill him the next, with the jester not having done anything to deserve being treated like that except existing. What Beowulf had done was actually terrible, despite what Thedrick was, and he started to feel rather guilty about it.

Thedrick was a vampire, but if Balthasar was to be believed, he hadn't hurt anyone nor was he going to in the future. The chirurgeon was handling the jester's condition, and Thedrick was just trying to live a relatively normal life without anyone finding out about his secret and trying to kill him for it. But now he was hiding away in the infirmary, terrified that Beowulf might attempt to murder him again. It was up to Beowulf to properly apologise and try and make amends for what he had done.