Road to Fucking Nowhere

Family

"Bro, you just did it behind the counter? What the fuck?" Johnny said, astounded.

Johnny was in his room at the Smith's house and Ripp had come over to practice guitar with him. Although both of them had their guitars clutched in their hands, it wasn't that they were doing, or talking about at the moment. Ripp had the biggest grin plastered to his face and looked very proud of himself, as he talked about his encounter with Chloe.

"Yeah, it was amazing. She was so good too, knew what she was doing and teaching me and everything. She even said she would come back for more," Ripp added, a dreamy look in his eyes.

"Remember this is my aunt you're talking about by the way," Johnny said awkwardly. "Just keep that in mind whilst you're talking about, well, screwing her."

"You never told me alien chicks had penises, Johnny."

Johnny nearly dropped his guitar.

"Excuse me? Okay this is definitely getting weird. Not another word about my aunt in this context, bro please"-

"I can't just experience an alien penis and not want to know about it. Now tell me more, Johnny," Ripp said, poking Johnny playfully.

"No!"

"Alright then, keep your alien secrets Johnny. I'm not going to deny it being an interesting looking alien-dick though. Dude, what is this fucking conversation?," Ripp laughed.

"I don't know Ripp, you ask me. You bought this up in the first place," Johnny teased.

"I mean, I do have the romance aspiration. I'm a horny guy."

"Yeah, and almost every conversation with you somehow ends with sex or penises or something. I should've known something was up with you as soon as we met back in middle school, when you started talking about how much better it would be to have a penis."

"Man, now that you put it like that, the trans thing, it was so obvious before I found out on my own. Even if it was my horny thoughts. Those things are more convenient though."

"You just want to get more girls, don't you Ripp."
"Well yeah, it would be so much easier when you're, you know"-

"Okay Ripp, I know how sex works."

"Good to know, Johnny. In case we ever needed that for each other." Ripp joked.

"Bro, what?"
"Just bandmates being bandmates. Doing totally normal things like kissing and fucking. Dude, I'm kidding," Ripp burst into laughter at the shocked look on Johnny's face. "Anyway, we should really start playing guitar now."

"Yeah," Johnny said, glad to finally be free of this topic. "So should we pick a song and make it work together?"

"Alright."