Gratsu: a long job

Chapter 11: The Question

(A/N: Sorry for the slow update. But I have realized that I really love adverbs when I write.)

Gray POV:

My nose was surrounded by silky pink hair and swirled around with every inhale and exhale of my nostrils. They tickled immensely, and my heart was beating erratically to the point where it almost hurt. Yet, at the same time, I was so euphorically happy. I scrunched my eyes up, unable to contain this brilliant feeling erupting in my heart. I could see the quiet smile curling up Natsu's perfect lips.

What could all this mean? Didn't I like Juvia? I know she liked me, but maybe I thought of her just as a friend. My brain was full of confusing thoughts and emotions, a tidal wave of feelings overwhelmed my mind. But then, my eyes rested on Natsu's slumbering face, and I realized that regardless of anything else, holding him in my arms made me unbelievably happy. There was a weird tingling in my heart that was completely foreign to me but I loved it nonetheless. I wanted it to last forever.

"Ughh, what time is it?", Natsu groaned. Oh crap he's awake what do I do!?! He can't see me like this. What if he gets the wrong idea? But rather than freaking out, he instead snuggled further into my grasp, quietly sighing.

"Natsu, are you awake?"

"Sure", the pinkette yawned. "You never answered my question." He turned around so we were facing and buried his face into the crook of my neck.

I chuckled, "I guess you're okay with this?"

I heard a muffled response that sounded suspiciously like a "maybe".

"Well in that case it's about mid-morning. We should get to our stop in a few hours."

"Are we moving?" He asked, still muffled.

"Yeah. Are you okay?" Natsu shifted so that we were eye to eye.

"Yeah, I feel fine actually. It feels like when Wendy's spell still worked on me." He gave me one of those giant grins.

"Glad to hear it. I don't know about you, but I'm famished. Wanna go grab some grub?" He nodded eagerly. I reluctantly let go and roll off of the bed. Natsu groaned unhappily, "It's cold now." He crawled slowly off the bed but before he could get off his motion sickness returned.

"Really? Crap, Natsu are you serious!?" He looked up at me pathetically. My heart ached, I felt so bad for the poor Salamander.

"Gray.... sorry..."

"Naw man I'm not helping you out like that again; that's weird! I'm not a dazzlingly fabulous gay unicorn like you. I'm going to go get some food. You're on your own." And that I turned tail and fled, unable to witness his crushed, and confused, expression. Dazzlingly? What?

I just abandoned Natsu. He needed me. And throwing in that crack about him being gay, how could I? He didn't even know I knew. All those years ago, I remember following him and Erza and eavesdropping on their conversation. I heard those words come from his lips. They struck a chord with me. That's one of the reasons I always had to fight with him. I was afraid of what would happened if we actually got along.

*      *        *

"Hey Stripper!" Gray's ears turned red as he tried to bury his nose further into a large book.

"Leave me alone Natsu, I don't want go fight right now." Natsu tilted his head to the side with an unfortunately common confused look.

"What would we do besides fight?" Natsu plopped down uninvited on the seat next to Gray, humming a bit to himself as he was deep in thought. It was a little adorable, thought Gray.

"We could be friends?" Natsu eventually said cheerfully to Gray as if the idea had never occurred to him before. "We could be best friends! Inseparable! It'll be awesome: the Dynamic Duo of Fire and Ice!!"It was at this point that Gray realized that the path of friendship was a narrow and slippery slope. He knew himself well, if he let himself, he knew he would fall for the crazy fire wizard.

Hardening his eyes and ignoring the pain in his heart, he turned to Natsu and snarled, "Why would I want to be friends with you?" He made a mace of ice and swung full force into Natsu's head, which sent him flying to the floor. Any warm glow in Natsu's deep green eyes vaporized and was replaced with steamy hatred. What Gray had done was unforgivable and unforgettable. A single tear froze just beneath his right eye, but he had already run away from everyone.

*   *      *

I poked at my mashed potatoes absent mindedly, unable to fully grasp what happened this morning. What's going on with my head? Why do i feel this way? I slammed my fork onto the food until everything, potatos or not, was thoroughly mashed and mixed together. It was a mess. I even chuckled because it reminded me of my thoughts and how confused I was.

There was only one way to fix this.

I walked down the hallway with my eyes trained on the door to our compartment. My heart was pounding in my ears and I could feel my nervous heartbeat in my hands. If I went through this door, I would forever change Natsu and I's relationship. However, I couldn't be sure if that would be good or bad. If I just walked away, we'd be doomed to fight forever. This plain, cheap wooden door with the paint peeling in the top corners made all the difference. My hands and breath shaking, I grab onto the long graceful handle to the door. It was now, or never.

The door rolled open to reveal a passed out Natsu curled into a fetal position on the far end of the bed. I worm my way onto the bed and place a hand on Natsu's shoulder and shake gently. His eyes slowly peel open. There they were: they were dazzling balls of emotion. It was never hard to tell how Natsu felt; his eyes said everything. Their bright optimism always sent my soul soaring. I could feel my cheeks get warm.

"Hey Natsu?" His eyes rolled up to my face, hurt still clearly evident. He rolled over so he wasn't facing me anymore.

"What, Gray?" His voice was angry and sad, and it caught trying to say Gray's name.

"I was just wondering if maybe we could go to the magnolia festival together when we get back?" Natsu's eyes shot open.

"What?!"

"Natsu, do you remember a few years ago when I said that I didn't want to fight and you offered to be friends?" He nodded his head. He remembered that night clearly, it had been one of the worst of his childhood.

"Does the offer still stand?" I cracked out quietly, silently cursing myself for putting myself into a situation this vulnerable. He squinted, then a wave of peace spread over his whole body and he smiled a yes and cuddled up close to me. I wrapped an arm around Natsu's muscular body and noticed that he slowly intertwined our fingers.

AN: Adverbs. Yeah. I love adverbs.  It's truly, scarily, yet dazzlingly true.