Scraps of My Life

What is Life?

what is life? everyone have their own way to answer that question. probably most of people wouldn't have the same answer. just imagine, in this world there's almost 8 billion people that are alive and doing their own thing. A mother, Daughter, Father, Son, Teacher, Uncle, laborer, technician, scientist, seller, even a criminal. All of them have their own thoughts, problems, and just.. being alive..

There are a lot of things that happening as you read this chapter; a mother is feeling exhausted because her baby wouldn't go to sleep while carrying her baby on her arm. A scientist is working their ass off to solve the problem that seems couldn't be solved. A Father is playing with their children while they are off from work and try to cherish the moment. A son is feeling very distant with his parents and secretly missing them but seem couldn't have the courage to tell his parents that he misses them.

Life without living is nothing. Life without laugh is just a torture. Life without love is just a plain bread. In these days, people tend to forgot how to live. I'm not saying I'm not guilty either, sometimes I get so caught up with the technology and internet that we have, I sometimes forgot to live in the moment and wasting my time in something that wouldn't matter in the future. I spend too much time to choose what color of the phone case that I was about to buy online but in the end it doesn't really matter what color of my phone case as long it's still a phone case. One time I also spend so much time choosing what color of a scarf that I really want to buy for so long. I only wore it once, and the scarf is still in my closet until now.

What is life is depends on your own perspective. for me, at least right now, I feel like life is a game, a race, something that I can't seem to win. I've talked about this with a friend. She have the complete opposite answer as mine. She thinks life is not a competition, everyone have their own pace, their own path, and we don't have to follow other's pace or path to fulfil our life. It seems like it was the peaceful way of thinking about life. For a moment, I also try to implement that way of thinking to my life. but still, I sometimes still caught up with the pace of the world. "I have to find a good internship now" "I need to be accepted in this organization or else" "I need to have this Job" "i need to make more money" etc. I've read about this phenomenon, it is called "hustle culture" where everything and everyone seems moving so fast that we have to be so to, or else we fall behind. It is very human to feel like that, that we have to be on the same pace with everyone. But, at the same time it is also very exhausting isn't it?

I think It is a privilege and a accomplishment to able to think of life like the way that she do. But, actually, if I think of it again, it is a bit of a dilemma. what if I try to think about life as she did and the result is me being lazy, ignorant, and incompetent? In the end it is all about how we process things and how we do it. I don't think there's any problem of how me or my friend think about life. It is what we do about it that matters. And honestly, right now I feel very way behind from people, I feel like I should've accomplish more than what I have right now. But it also make me think about something..

Earlier, my dad told me about a member of a family of ours that had gone through some rough times. He told me that this person used to be a very successful man, had a job in huge company and a great position and also a great income. one day because of the politic, the company was unfortunately closed and everyone on the company was jobless. In a very short time, he suddenly lose his Job, his only source of income, and his power on that company. He tried to get back again with starting his own company, but he got scammed by his friend and failed miserably. He tried again, and the same thing happened all over again. Now he isn't only lost his job, but also his pride and a lot of money. He becomes very quite, distance, and keeping himself away from the society, his wife divorce him and that was the end of the story.

That story made me realize that there's more than just power and money that people should've been focuses on more. The hustle world that we lived in sometimes make us forgot what actually matter. what is actually worth to fight. I think to find the answer to that is a life time journey. 12 year old me would have a different answer than my answer now about what is important and worth to fight in this life. I also can't answer that question for you, because that is something that everyone have to find themselves so it means more to ourselves.

So, what do you think? what life is to you? and what is that one thing other than money and power that actually matters to you?