Cat Flap: A Random Thingy

Cat Flap

I sat in my room pondering the nature of existence, blinking unendlessly until my cat got annoyed and told me to stop. I was startled. Since when could my cat talk? Since when did I have a cat for that matter? I pondered and blinked some more, staring at the little muggy with my third eye. Wait, since when I did have a third eye?

I was puzzled and so I quickly rushed through my front door (my "room" was actually a cardboard box next to the M25) and rushed down to the local doctor's to inquire as to my condition.

"Something's not right about the above sentence," he said.

"I agree," I replied, "What can be done about it?"
The doctor paused for thought.

"Well," said thought, "I don't know what I can contribute to this matter."

"Try, say anything" replied the doctor.

"Hmmm..."

"Who said that?" we all asked.

"It was me."

"Who's me?"

"Me."

"Yes, you said, but who are you?" we asked collectively.

"Me."

"Yes, but-never mind."

"I won't."

"Now, where we were-" began the doctor.

"You mean, where were we-" responded thought, and the doctor shot thought through the face rather crossly.

"Ouch," replied thought.

"Ha!" said the doctor.

I sat and watched in awe and amazement at the sight. Awe and amazement look inside themselves and told me to get out, which I did promptly, and the sight gave a loud squeal and I had to apologise to them. Awe and amazement looked at each other, slapped each other on the backs and walked out of the office, with the sight running along behind them with a towel wrapped around them.

I blinked, amused, and the doctor asked "Why are you amusing?"
"Because I just blinked."

"Well, stop it."
"That's what my cat told me this morning. Oh yes, I forgot to mention that."
"Well, why didn't you mention it before?"
"Because I forgot."
"Ah well, we need to do something about that."

And we did something about it. Doing it with something about it was rather disappointing, and something about it pointed out that the doctor did say to do something about that, not something about it.

"Well, where can I find something about that?" I asked.

"Ah, that is a long story."

"Tell me, then."
"No, I mean something about that is a long story, had surgery for it a couple of months ago."

"Yes, but where can I find it?"
"That."

"Sorry, that."

"You'll have to pay me for such information."

"No, no, you don't understand!"

"Oh, sorry," they replied and they overstood.

"Much better."

And the universe folded in.