It was just a crush!!!

Chapter 4

Today was the first day of school. Avery's mom drove us to school together, and we met up with the girls in the entryway. Of course, I was not thrilled to see them like I was to see Avery. I don't understand why I have to socializing with them. I know they do not like me and they know I do not like them either. I just wish Avery would realize I don't belong with them.  I nodded and talked a little with them, only they weren't really listening to me.

I shouted with enthusiasm, "You guys really for high school?" as a foolish grin spread across my face. Don't get me wrong, I don't despise these girls without reason. Avery brought me into this clique. And I wasn't greeted with open arms, to say the least. You see, I'm best friends with the queen bee herself. Avery's word is law around here. And it has its perks.

Somehow Avery attained immense popularity, though I'm not sure how. She just has a magnetic charm that draws you in and doesn't let go. So when Avery pulled me in, everyone complied. Who dares defy the queen bee? They pretended to like me with Avery around, but the moment she left, their fake smiles vanished as they regarded me like an outsider. Most of the girls were subtly cruel, interrupting me mid-sentence or responding "that's nice for you" in a patronizing tone, signaling they wanted me to stop talking. But Paige, who's dating my nemesis, hates me the most. I'm sure Jacks trash-talked me, because Paige always looks ready to throw down whenever I sit at our table. She tries to conceal it, but I catch her rolling her eyes every time. I know I'm not wanted here, but I only come for one person.

"Avery!" one of the girls chirped, beaming at her friend. "Long time no see! How's your summer been?"

Avery's face lit up. "It's been so great!" she replied enthusiastically, throwing an arm around me in a side hug. "Nova and I have had the best time just hanging out and enjoying our break."

I offered a small smile, going along with Avery's cheerful tone.

"That's awesome!" Avery continued brightly. "What about you girls? Any fun plans or adventures?" She asked.

Avery always tries her best to include me, when obviously I'm not wanted. Which is one of the things I like about her, but also can't stand. You see the reason why our friendship works so well, is because we're complete opposites. Avery cares way too much about popularity, while I love being at home eating a giant tub of ice cream and never having a single human interaction. She gets straight A's. I get straight C's, I'm black she's white you get the picture. She helps me do better in school. I help her not care so much. No one else understands our friendship though. Really it's no one's business to begin with, I remember one time this girl told Avery that she didn't get how she could be friends with me, and Avery went off on her. I mean really went off. Avery's a sunshine and rainbows person but when it comes to our friendship, I'd like to say I rubbed off on her. Avery told her "how dare you disrespect my best friend" wagging her finger. And continued, "you're not even on her level" She stated getting in the girls face. The girl scoffed and walked away. Never to question me and Avery's friendship again.

...

I stepped into the classroom, the fluorescent lights glaring down at the rows of desks. Jim stood at the front, his back turned as he scribbled his name in chalk across the blackboard. I slid into my seat, keeping my eyes downcast, hoping to avoid his gaze for as long as possible. The shrill ring of the bell pierced the air and Jim spun around with artificial cheerfulness. "Good morning class!" he exclaimed with a plastered-on smile. I sank lower in my chair, letting my hair fall in front of my face like a curtain. I could feel his eyes darting towards me every few seconds, his pathetic attempt at subtlety failing miserably. Everyone would know soon enough about him and my mom. The thought made my cheeks burn. During roll call, I responded to my name with a quiet "here," still not meeting his hopeful stare. This was going to be a long semester.

The harsh red chalk scrawled out an unfamiliar name - Mr. Newman. A name that would cruelly strip my mother of her identity, reshaping Melody Howard into the foreign Melody Newman. The syllables jarred together, an unharmonious cacophony rather than the symphony the naïve perceived. This was no destiny, only a destructive fate tearing her from the name she had worn with quiet dignity for 25 years. Melody Howard. The name rolled melodiously, beautifully, speaking of the young girl who had blossomed into a woman, wife, and mother. My parents' romance had been just as harmonious, a resonant song of friendship deepening into affection. Their love soared, as gradual and sweet as a symphony building to its crescendo. But this - this Newman - shattered that perfect melody with a dissonant clang. I hated it.

It was love at first sight for my mom. She still remembers the day my dad walked through the door, a bouquet of flowers in hand for my ailing grandmother. In that moment, seeing his compassion and kindness, she was swept away. My father tells it differently - for him, it was a slow burn, steadily falling for my mother's infectious laugh, her animated hands that spoke as much as her words, the way she'd play with her hair when nervous. He loved her for who she was within, not simply her outward beauty. Though she was certainly gorgeous too. Their story gives me hope that a love like that exists for us all, someday, somehow. A love that sees the soul behind the eyes, and cherishes it. I aspire to give and receive that kind of love - the kind that lasts beyond looks and infatuations, beyond circumstance, beyond all else. The kind that heals, uplifts, and lights the way. That's the kind of love we all deserve to find.

After the last bell rang, Jim beckoned me over to his desk. Leaning against the smooth, woodgrain surface, he gazed at me intently, as if I had done something wrong. I shifted uncomfortably, feeling the eyes of lingering students judging me. Jim's mouth curved into a gentle smile that only made my frustration grow. "I know having me as your teacher is an adjustment," he began, his voice low and steady. "But I want to make this as easy as possible for you. I hope we can build a positive relationship, because I really admire your-"

"Thanks, I appreciate it," I interjected, eager to end the conversation. Jim's eyes clouded with words unspoken, but I wasn't ready to hear them. Not here, not now.

"You're welcome," he said finally, pressing his lips together. I turned and hurried for the door, only to hear Jim call out, "It's Mr. Newman in class, please."

I nodded, cheeks burning, as I rushed from the room. The rest of the teachers only went over the usual first day of school topics - reading, writing, and so on. I'll admit I zoned out halfway through their monotonous speech.