Fostered

Chapter One

I scream at the top of my lungs as I'm pulled to the car. Sirens howl all around me and I try my best to resist. However, I'm pushed into the back seat of the police car and the door slams before I can even try to get out. The flashing red and blue lights surround me and the emergency vehicles ahead of me block the view from my brother.

As we pull away, I catch a glimpse of Ethan. He lies on his back with his head turned to one side. His mouth is slightly open, allowing a stream of blood to leak out onto the gravel. His light brown eyes are glossy and lifeless. The car begins to move and I press my hands to the window. I'm completely incapable of helping the situation. I start to cry as the images of my older brother lying dead in the street fill my head.

I hear his voice again. I hear his laugh again. And then silence...

I lurch forward, sitting upright in my bed. My hair sticks to my sweaty forehead and my heart pounds behind my ribcage. I look around the room. Maisie, Sarah, Esmeralda, and Kenzie all sleep soundly. The tiny night light by Sarah's bed helps me find my way to the bathroom. I close the door and switch on the light.

I press my palms against the cold bathroom counter. I lean closer to the mirror and stare at my reflection. I look like hell. My short, platinum blonde hair is disheveled and messy. I have dark bags underneath my bloodshot brown eyes. I haven't slept well in five days. This upcoming move is stressing me out. I keep having that stupid dream.

It never goes away...

I exit the bathroom and just as I'm about to leave the bedroom, Esmeralda sits up, "Sloan?"

"Yeah?" I whisper.

"Is everything okay?" She murmurs, her thick Spanish accent still audible.

"Yeah... I'm good. I'm gonna get some water." I tell her, closing the door gently behind me.

I creep down the hallway, careful not to wake any of the other kids in the home. I tiptoe down the staircase and slip past the office. I notice Hallie on the computer in the dark. The screen gives off a light blue glow that illuminates her face. She adjusts her glasses, pushing them up her nose. I turn the corner to go into the kitchen and I hear her voice.

"Sloan." She says sternly.

I hang my head and spin around on my heel, trudging back to the office door. She's turned around in her chair, facing me. I step into the office and she gestures to the chair next to her. I sit down and slump, exhaling loudly.

"Bad dream again, huh?" Hallie asks.

Her hands find her dirty blonde ponytail and begin fidgeting with the rubber band. I just nod and cast my gaze toward the floor. Hallie scoots closer and I tense up.

"I'm sorry. I know you're worried about this move." She begins.

No, really? Why would I be worried? It's only my 13th new home since I've been put in this shitty system.

"And I know it doesn't mean much... But, I'm sorry about your brother. I know that it's hard to see that when you're 14. Hell, it was hard to see when I was 42."

"Please don't talk about Ethan." I growl, clenching my jaw.

"I'm sorry. It's a sensitive subject, I know. Look... All I'm trying to say is that even though the past is messed up... It's the past... And-"

"You are treading on mighty thin ice." I warn.

"Sorry... I-"

"And stop apologizing. You can't change what happened. Neither can I. Nobody can. So lets just not talk about it, okay?" I shake my head and turn away, looking down at my worn Family Guy pajama pants.

It's silent for an unusual amount of time. Hallie sighs. I feel bad, knowing that she tries to be nice. She's the nicest caretaker we have. But I hate that I'm in this situation to begin with. I despise this stupid home. I despise living with strangers for weeks, sometimes months at a time. I hate my mother for what she did to us. I hate my life, to be completely honest. So I've settled on making everybody else dislike me. That way, I don't have to worry about caring for anyone.

The last person I ever cared about was Ethan. That's why I'll never care about anybody else again. What's the point, anyway? Everybody dies in the end. I guess I'm selfish, but when you're left without a single family member to care for you, you have to take care of yourself. Which, I do a pretty good job with.

Finally, she speaks again.

"Look. Here. Let me pull up an email." She clicks through her files and pulls up her inbox.

To: Hallie Smith

Subject: Foster Care

Dear Ms. Smith,

I'm delighted to hear that Sloan will be staying with us. My boys are absolutely ecstatic to have another sister! Who knows, maybe this will be a permanent adjustment for them. We're prepping the house for her arrival. My husband and I are thrilled to accommodate another addition to our family. We have had two foster children prior to Miss Sloan, however they were both younger. But I know that she'll be no trouble and we'll take excellent care of her. I do hope she doesn't mind the distance, seeing that we live about an hour away from the Group Home. Anyway, I cannot wait to see her! Thank you so much again!

Sincerely, Tina McKinnon

I nearly cringe at the woman's upstate vocabulary. From what I've heard, this family is the complete opposite of what I'm used to. The father is a neurosurgeon, the mother is a lawyer, and the daughter already has a full ride scholarship to NYU. The boys are up and coming lacrosse players and I'm sure their dog has also aspired to great things.

To top it all off, their house is amazing. I mean, I've only seen pictures. It's a massive house up in Amherst. And they have a pool. I guess I can look forward to that... And I can't wait to see what kind of "rules" they'll lay out for me. Nearly every house I've been put in has given me rules to follow. Of course, I never do. They aren't my real parents. What do they know?

"Excited yet?" Hallie chuckles.

I stifle a harsh laugh and stand up. "I'm gonna get some water and then go to bed."

"Do you have your stuff packed up for tomorrow?" She asks.

"You know it." I say as I exit the room.

"Alright. Goodnight, Sloan."

"Night." I click my tongue and retrieve a glass, filling it and going back upstairs.

I finish my water and lie in bed. I face the ceiling and chew my bottom lip.

"It won't be so bad." Esmeralda says quietly.

I close my eyes, "Whatever you say. I just want to age out."

"Don't we all?" Maisie chimes in sleepily.

"Go the fuck to sleep." Sarah grumbles.

"Goodnight guys." Esmeralda rolls over.

We all say goodnight and I struggle to sleep. Eventually, I find myself drifting off... But I can't stop thinking about how much this is going to suck.