Fodder: A Collection of Scenes

Post Mortem

I laid tensely in the field, focusing on my ragged breathing. I ignored the screaming, the smell of burning flesh and plane fuel. I ignored the sharp metallic taste of blood and the sick feeling of it being drained from my body. I ignored all this. Right now, I was angry. Angry at God, at life.

My best friend hovered over me, blood dripping down from her temple like a crimson tear. She said something that I couldn't hear. I squinted my eyes at her, my ears still ringing from the crash, and tried to focus on what she was saying.

"It's okay. It'll be okay. Oh, God. Oh, this can't happen. Trinity!" She sobbed in a rush, hyperventilating slightly.

I started laughing at her. God. People always beg God for help. She stopped crying and stared at me like I was mad. I felt mad, at that moment.

"God," I laughed again, bitterly, "God isn't here. In case you haven't noticed the world has kind of gone to shit. God abandoned us. All of us." I stated bluntly, my voice cracking towards the end.

"That's not true..." Mia looked away.

"No?"

"No." She said more confidently, "God is here. He has a plan. You'll go to Heaven if it's your time."

"Maybe." I whispered pensively. I don't deserve Heaven, but I also don't belong in Hell. So where will I go when this is all over?

I coughed spasmodically, pain searing through my chest. Blood was starting to tickle my throat. I couldn't feel my legs anymore. I was starting to become numb all over. I knew the end was near.

"Go get help, Mia." With one look at my stern eyes, she was off, stumbling around broken seats and broken bodies in search of rescuers.

She wouldn't find help in time. I knew that and maybe, deep down, she knew that. I was going to die, but she didn't need to see that. There wasn't any pain anymore. I felt like I was suspended in time, forever waiting.

Then I felt it. The weakness and the relief and I closed my eyes for death. With that, I floated into unconsciousness as the last ragged breath left my lips.

......................

I opened my eyes, but I couldn't see. I couldn't move either. I could hear crying voices around me, close and at the same time far away. What was this? Then my vision started returning and I could see...everything. The whole world was somehow translucent. Nothing was solid. I could see the bland sky, the conflicted faces of my family, and my coffin lid...

I was six feet under.

I panicked instantly. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't yell. I was trapped. I was stuck in my own mind. This isn't death, this is Hell. I screamed and cried and suffered, but with no avail.

"Hello?" I heard a voice calling out, seemingly right next to my ear. I answered uncertainly to the mysterious voice."Come up here."

"I can't move. I've been buried."

"Yes, you can. Your body can't move, but you can." The voice insisted.

I pondered this for a second. The voice, as if it could hear my thoughts, explained how my soul was free. I could control where I went. All I had to do was envision what I wanted. So, I imagined myself next to my mom and then I was there. It was just like teleporting in the movies. I was practically bubbling with excitement.

"Good job." I spun around towards the voice. What I saw could best be described as energy. Pulsing veins of blue in a loose body form that shifted and contracted with vibrant surges of color.

"Who...what are you?" I asked, both appalled and intrigued.

"My name's Jasper Wintress. I'm dead. Like you." The form answered with a chuckle.

"Do I...do I look like that?" I must have sounded very naïve, but I couldn't help it.It was just too weird.

"We all do. Come on, I'll explain everything." His face lit up and his form pulsated as he moved.

I followed Jasper all day as he explained things. He offered me the chance to say goodbye to my family, but said that I couldn't stay with them. Attachment was how vengeful spirts formed. We moved through the cemetery, talking. I saw other spirits. Some were in pairs like us, some were still in graves, and some were odd. I saw dark spirits, ones that didn't have the pulsing beauty that Jasper had. He explained that they had given up, nihilism consuming their afterlife.

I listened intently to his explanations, lessons, and warnings. He seemed to understand everything, while I didn't understand anything...

This was it. This was my afterlife. It was shiny and new, but it was also forever.