PLEAD
Patricia
"Tell me what can I do to save her?!"
I shout and plead"Patricia like you, we're trying our best to do the thing we could do "
Doctor bright saysI could wait any longer seeing my wife in that state I can't
Because I'm suffering too seeing her like that
"But I don't think this will work "
He said"What do you mean?"
I asked"Because if you the under go an operation and not the same compatible heart donor the operation might failed doc "
Doc bright said"There's a 3 % chance that she might make it "
He said even there's another way around to save her but the chance is to small it will take her lead to her own if we failed death and I can't afford to loose her
That's the thing I suggest but doubt that I might kill her
"Think about Patricia comeback here if you made your decision now "
He said and tap my shoulder"I don't know where to go so I'm here because the only thing I could think is you"
I said while looking at the chapel on this hospital"I know I don't have the right to asked you or beg you ,I know that but seeing the person you love suffering and being in pain is a torture ,like a torn that giving you endlessly pain "
I look at chapel and close my eyes while my eyes full of tears"Please I Will never asked for anything but God I begged you save her please, I'm willing to let go and turn anything I have just to save her, please.... please....save her"
I sayI kneel my both knee in front of that person they call god
I never believe to god or better yet to say I stop believing on him when my family become broken
"Please..."
I say and keep looking at that person whose in front of me"I can't loose her not her please God.... just save her ,you hear me?!save her please!"
I cry myself out and cry on the floor"Patricia"
"Mom"
I call to my mother in law she ran at my side and hug me"You should being like this ,you poor child if your suffering please tell us"
Her mother is crying to an it broke me into pieces because I forgot once again that there's always a person whose there beside me ,she hugged me tight and that's when I realized I'm on my break pointI cry on her shoulder
"Mom I'm scared, I'm.... I -I'm scared"
I say she keeps tapping me and tells me everything will be alright
Even my father in law hug us to he's not crying but I know deep inside on him he's crying but he doesn't want us to be weak in front of us
"Don't be free will get through with this Patricia"
NEXT DAY
"Ahhh!!! It's hurt !!...mom "
Freen shout while holding he's chest and keeps moving non-stop"Oh my god nurse !"
"Freen you need to calm "
But freen push me away while keep holding her breatheThe nurse gives me an injection were they Puth an drug to calm freen
I'm shivering and scared but I want to do this I need to take care of her
"Freen"
I say I'm whisper, she's cryingI know she doesn't want me to see her in that state
"Let me handle it hold her now!"
Doc bright say and all the nurse inside the room hold freen and try to restrain her on the bed because she keeps movingI hide my tear and whipe it away using my backhand
"It's hurt..."
Freen whisperI hold her hand and touch the strand on her hair try to calm her using the method that I know
"Freen you need to sleep"
I softly said and kiss her in forehead"Stay"
She say before closing her eyes"Promise "
I said"Patricia "
Irinn hug me as I cry on her shoulder"I'm trying, I'm trying...but--
And once again I cry ,I always strong because in myself I say I'm alone so I have to safe all the struggle and suffering in my life so I mean an move but this?
I don't know anymore because freen break the wall that I barely hard to build for myself so anyone or other people can't hurt me but after she came to my life everything has change because of her
My life turns upside down
And now I'm stuck on a place we're I don't even know
"I'm trying to be strong Irinn but seeing her like that I can't bare it to see ,I just wish I was the one suffering on her behalf Irinn"
I say and keeps crying on her shoulder"Pat please you need to be strong no matter what happens,she needs you , your wife needs you so no matter what happens stay strong"
She saidShe keeps hugging me
I look at my wife whose lying on the bed sleeping peacefully
"She's... she's asleep"
I sayIrinn nod
"She looks exhausted"
Irinn said"It's true"
I sayI walk and stand behind on her bed
"She looks tired and in pain"
I say"You I wish she always like this "
I saidIrinn only listen and didn't even dare to interrupt me
"Sleeping peacefully so she would not wake up and feeling that pain"
I say while fixing my wife's hair"Pat"
She tap me shoulder
"Please stop torturing yourself and stop being hard to yourself,freen doesn't want you to be like that"
Irinn saidI sight and look at him directly
"How? How can I seeing her like this Irinn is torturing so how could I be not be hard to myself seeing my wife on this place that I don't want to see "
I say I know no one at fault but I'm mad because I'm hereJust here but nothing
Nothing I could do to help her
And it's killing me
I look at my wife whose sleeping and kiss her forehead
"Sleep love when you wake up let's take our second honeymoon"
I jokely say