Finding Emrys: The Forgotten Tale Book 4

To Break A Heart

Authors Note: Don't forget to leave a comment.  :)
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Gwens POV
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Their back! I can feel my heart racing. A huge smile upon my face as I raced down the steps. My legs practically flying down the cobblestone path leading to where the knights slowly began to disembark from their horses.

Finally after what seemed forever i reached them. My eyes scanning the faces searching for my love. Yet as I searched i noticed the sorrow in the knights eyes. The grief filling their faces. The way none of them would meet my eyes even Merlin who was out right sobbing as she was carried inside by Gwaine.

My excitement immediately turned to dread. My search becoming more frantic as my desperation to just see his face. To know he is ok increased tenfold. It wasn't until Arthur slowly approached me holding Lancelots sword that I knew. I could hear Arthur saying something but it might as well have been gibberish for all i cared. My knees giving out beneath me. Arthurs arms the only thing keeping me from face planting as I screamed my anquish to the sky. Tears of pain and horror filling my heart. Pleading for the king to tell me he is lying. That this is all just some kind of poor joke. Yet no relief came. Only more pain as Arthur pulled me into his arms.

Sitting cross legged on the ground. Arthur held me. Ignoring the curious eyes of those passing by. Never once letting go. I was told later that my brother tried to take me from Arthur but I clung so hard to the king that he now has bruises on his arms. So Evlyan gave up leaving me with Arthur.

Even when it began to rain. I refused to let go of Arthur. Crying away my pain and grief. Arthur holing me through all of it. Finally after what seemed an eternity i felt myself growing weary. My limbs finally loosening from their grip as I fell asleep.

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Even a week later my grief remains. My heart shattered beyound repair. Only Arthur able to handle my depressive state. Even evlyan said I wasn't myself. Yet somehow Arthur. Not only stayed by my side. Even when I screamed and cursed at him. But also made it his mission to make sure I ate, slept, and overall took care of myself.

He was and is the light in my seemingly dark world.  He is the reason my heart slowly began to beat a new. Deep down I know I am rebounding and that my feelings for him are a biproduct of my grief, but so great was my fear of the darkness returning. I ignored my brain and listened solely to my pain which saw Arthur as a raft in an otherwise stormy sea.

I knew I was taking advantage of his feelings for me but in that moment i didn't care. I accepted the flowers he would bring me. Encouraged the kisses he would place at the top of my head each day. The lingering touches that meant something more. Until one day when he went to place a kiss ontop of my head i tilted my head back and met his lips head on. Kissing him in full.

At first he was shocked attempting to pull away but not wanting him to push me away. I threw my arms around his neck and pulled him closer. Deepening the kiss. After a moment of hesitation he accepted. Wrapping his own arms around my waist and kissing me back.
Unaware of the black haired witch watching in horror from a hidden alcove.  Her heart breaking as she swiftly snuck away never noticing the guilt ridden tears flowing down my cheeks as I kissed Arthur.

From that day forth I stopped fighting. Accepting Arthurs suit of love and agreeing to marry him. I knew I didn't actually love him. In fact I had no feelings for him at all but I was desperate to feel that love i lost. I may be taking advantage of Arthurs love but at that moment something within me broke. My light snuffing out and giving way to a deep darkness. One that didn't care who I hurt as long as I could feel Lancelots love again. Even if that means taking advantage of the kings feelings for me.

If I can't have Lancelot then the kings love will be mine.