Vivianne Miedema One Shots

Panic attack

Summary: You have a panic attack while in the gym with your teammates. Viv is there to help you through it.

~

Vivianne knocked on your door a couple hours before training would start. "Hi baby, what are you doing here? I thought you would pick me up in two hours?" You ask as you let your girlfriend into your apartment. "I was hoping I could take you out for breakfast." You place a soft kiss onto her lips. "I'd love to, just give me a moment to get dressed." You gesture to your pyjamas, which actually just consisted of a t-shirt from Viv, paired with an old pair of Viv's national team shorts. Viv looks after you when you walk out of the room with a big smile on her face. She loved it when you wore her clothes.

Within a few minutes you were out the door, and off to the restaurant that Viv had in mind. It was nice to get in some time together before you would be surrounded by your teammates for the rest of the day. Not to be mistaken, you loved your teammates at Arsenal dearly, they just didn't know about your relationship just yet. The two of you had decided to keep it to yourselves for now, your teammates were like family, but you knew they would be all over your relationship if they knew about it.

Breakfast at the small restaurant with Viv by your side was the best start to your morning. She drove you home, and walked you back to your front door. "Thank you for breakfast." You say before you kiss her. "Thank you for agreeing to be my date." She jokes back. "I love you, Viv." You opened the door to your apartment, and let her go inside first. "I love you too." Viv says back while bringing you in for a hug. The both of you change into your training kits before Viv drives you over to the training grounds.

Viv often drove you to practice before the two of you had started dating, as you lived on route for the striker, so you decided that this wouldn't be a factor in your teammates finding out about your relationship. It was always nice to have some extra time with your girlfriend before you would head your separate ways for training.

Training today was in the gym. Strength training wasn't exactly your favourite. Of course, you were well aware of the positive effects strength training had on your body physically, however for you it tended to have negative effects mentally. On the pitch your mind was clear, running was very good for your mental health. In the gym, your mind was always racing.

That's how you found yourself laying on the bench press, the weights were loaded on for a new PR but you couldn't set yourself to actually lift the weights. It wasn't because you were afraid to try and lift the weight, you had been in your head the whole morning about the match you'd be playing in the weekend. Though, your spotter, Katie, thought it was because it would be a new PR. "You don't have to try for a new PR. I can just take some weight off, and do your regular sets if you'd prefer that." You couldn't find the words to tell her that it had nothing to do with the weights.

It was getting harder for you to breathe, so you sat up, hoping it would let the air flow more freely. That wasn't the case, as you felt your panic attack start crashing down. Your eyes turned glassy, and your chest was going up and down rapidly. Katie kneeled down next to you, "Hey, it's okay. Take a deep breath in." She placed a hand on your knee, "And out."

Katie was trying her best to help you, but quite honestly, she had no idea what to do. She tried to get your breathing back to normal but it didn't help. A few of your teammates started to form around you, not that you noticed. They were all worried, Alessia tried asking you what you needed. With everything in you, you tried to say VIv's name but you knew there was barely any sound behind it. They tried figuring out what you were trying to say, Katie was the first to say it, "Viv?" You reach down to touch the hand she has on your knee. "You want us to get Viv?" With another squeeze to her hand, you try to communicate the word yes. "Someone go get Viv." Katie orders, not wanting to leave your side herself.

Alessia sprints away to get Viv, the latter being on the other side of the gym, and had not yet noticed the commotion. "Viv, you need to come with me." Alessia says when she made it to VIv's side. "I have a few more sets left, can it wait a few minutes?" Alessia shakes her head, "It's y/n, I think she's having a panic attack." Viv drops the weight she was holding immediately, and runs after Alessia.

She sits behind you on the bench and wraps her arms around you tightly. In this moment, she couldn't care less about the team finding out about your relationship, she just wanted you to be okay. You find her hands, and she intertwines her fingers with yours as she wraps her arms around your body again. The feeling of her pressed against you helped ground you a little bit.

Viv started softly whispering into your ear. "It's okay, baby. I've got you. Keep breathing with me, okay? It's all going to be okay." Katie had ushered everyone to take a step back, to give you some space. The girls stood to the side nervously, they had never seen you like this before. Some of them had never even seen someone have a panic attack before.

The constant voice of your girlfriend, and the pressure from her surrounding you, managed to pull you out of your panic attack slowly. You leaned into Viv's body, her signal to move on to the next step that helped you. It was a trick that your therapist had taught you, one that you had found stupid at first, but once put to practice, you found out that it actually helped. "Ready, baby?" You squeeze her hand softly. "Okay, name me five things that you can see."

It took a moment for your eyes to get back into focus. With a shaky voice you start naming your surroundings. "Your hands, the bench, gym equipment, water bottle, and the team." Viv hums next to your ear, "Very good, baby, can you name me four things you can feel?" You close your eyes again for this one. "You, the ground, the bench, and the air." She kisses your shoulder softly, "You're doing amazing. How about three things you can hear?" Your breathing was already starting to get more regular. "You, my breath, and the team."

"Can you take a deep breath for me?" You nod and breathe in deeply, letting out the air slowly. Viv wanted to check if you were indeed doing as well with your breathing as she thought you did. After a few more deep breaths, she realised that she didn't need to continue with the rest of the steps, as your breathing had returned to its natural rhythm.

Your body stays pressed against your girlfriend, the comfort she was bringing you helping you come down from the panic attack. Katie walked closer again, your water bottle in hand. "Here, take this." She says when she hands it to you. "Thank you, Katie." The both of you knew it wasn't just for the water bottle, but also for her attempts to help you earlier. "So, you two?" Katie motions between the two of you with a smirk on her face. There was no way of hiding it now, so you nod. "Yeah." The confirmation said with a smile. The chatter from the rest of the team starts to pick up again, now that they knew that you were okay..

"Do you need anything, baby?" Viv's voice is still soft. "I think I want to run for a bit, instead of being in the gym." She stands up and holds her hands out for you to take. "Can I join you, or would you rather run on by yourself?" You let her help you up. "Can you come with me, please?"

Viv takes your hand and walks you to the training fields. "Do you want to talk about what happened?" You shake your head. "Not now, but do you maybe want to come over after practice and then we can?" She gives your hand a loving squeeze. "Yes, of course." With that plan set in place, you have reached the field, and start running together.

Your mind full of thoughts emptied the moment you ran your first lap around the pitch. The cold air hitting your face, the way your boots hit the ground. Something about running had always felt safe to you, it helped ground you. You were grateful for Viv, she always knew what you needed, and was able to give you another safe space, by being one.