Better than Friends

Chapter 11: I'm starting to realize things

• • •

"If you cannot swallow your pride,
you are not thirsty enough for her love."

- Pierre Jeanty

• • •

"You need to apologize, Tria," Elenor sighed as she threw me a worried glance. Elenor, who was taking a business course, operations management, followed beside me as we made our way to the College of Business Administration,.

I rolled my eyes at her and groaned. It was unfair that I had to bury my anger for Cassidy when I've been doing it all my life.

"Why me?" I asked, keeping my voice steady. I didn't want to cause anymore issues even though I stood my ground that the last one wasn't because of me. "I always apologize first."

"Exactly," Elenor pointed out as if I what I just said made everything clear. "Cassidy's ego can't take it if she has to apologize first, Tree, yours can."

"That doesn't mean I have to accommodate to her all the time, Elsy." I looked over at her and noted that her expression seemed conflicted. I knew that Cass and her had some sort of secret that they were keeping from me, it explained all the silent looks they threw earlier during lunch.

Speaking of then, after I told Dawson that I would meet him after classes to discuss a proper course of action that must be dealt with absolute participation, Elenor and I headed to our classes. Even as I left the cafe, his eyes looked into mine, worried for me. It made my insides churn warmly and I smiled just thinking about it.

"I know, Tria, but please for the sake of our friendship can you just apologize first?" Elenor was begging now and I hated it whenever she did that. She would never beg for a grade so she shouldn't beg for a friendship she rightfully deserves.

"I can't this time, Els," I answered honestly, throwing her a sad smile which she returned with a groan.

We climbed up the stairs of the college, her first class in the afternoon being on the fourth floor while mine was on the third.

"I worry for her," Elenor admitted, throwing me a glance that showed me just how worried she was for our friend. The same look someone gives you when a boat is sinking; panic.

I pursed my lips and nodded for her to continue even though I'm sure I already knew what she'd say.

"She doesn't belong in our world," Elenor began, wincing as she said the words. It was an unspoken thing between the both of us because saying it aloud made us the very thing we were; rich assholes.

"She knows that and so do we, it's a truth we can't run from or deny." She glanced down at her feet as we climbed the stairs, a silent metaphor. "She doesn't have friends that stick around too long and all she really has in this city is us, she's the one who loses if this friendship ends, Tree, we still stay afloat."

I bit my lip, thinking about it in Elenor's perspective. It wasn't a topic the both of liked to dwell on but seeing it from that standpoint it was hard to deny that Cassidy never truly did belong with us. While we went North whenever school ended she would go South. She's the one who would drive me home most days as well, could I actually afford to lose my friendship with her?

"You know I love her," I confessed to Elenor, which surprised her before regaining composure. "We've been friends since we were kids, she's protected me whenever the other kids would tease me for looking as I did back then, and even now that we're fighting I can't help but want to run back to her and apologize—but Elenor just because I love her and want the best things for her, doesn't mean I let her walk all over me."