Twas' a jolly good day in pony land, the sun was shining and the birds were chirping, the breeze brought with it the smell of flowers.
Twilight sparkle happily trotted up to her friends as soon as she saw them in the town square,"Hey guys! Guess what?"
Rainbow Dash turned to face twilight with a smile, "what is it Twilight?"
"I heard a new pony is coming to town!"
The groups looked surprised, twilight was the last pony to move to pony land, so who knew?Maybe the new pony would join the friend group.
Pinkie pie points her hoof over twilights shoulder;
"Like that one?" She asks. The group all turn to face a tall pony, with a nicotine yellow completion and soulless eyes.
As if on cue, the new pony adresses the group; "Hey gang waddup it me"
All six of them joyfully respond. Applejack tilts her hat and winks; "Howdy" Twilight blushes a bit; "Hi" Rainbow Dash give the new pony a fist bump; "What's up?"
Fluttershy peaks her lash's out of behind from behind rarity and nervously waves her hoof.
The new pony introduces himself as he jesters a hoof to his chest, "Its me, pony molester"
The cheery mood dropped immediately.
Applejack was the first to break the awkward silence. "Uhh.. What did you just say your name was?.."
Without a moment's rest he, still smiling, looked her in the eyes as he said, "pony molester, I molest ponies"
Applejack was still confused. "Say that again, partner."
Ponymolester snapped back, stomping his hoof and dropping his smile.
"I molest ponies are you fucking stupid"
Rainbow Dash and Twilight in unison yelled: "WHAT?!" While Applejack, Fluttershy, and Rarity were too stunned to speak. Pinkie had tears welling in her eyes.
Ponymolester paid no mind to their disturbed reactions, "So... who's first?"
Fluttershy starts shrinking back even further behind a visibility repulsed Rarity, and covering her face. Rainbow Dash and Applejack have summon weapons, their hooves on their swords. Pinkie Pie is standing on the sidelines watching and Twilight looks upset
All of them are ready to either fight you or run away.
Boom.
Ponymolester uses a gun on pinkie.
Pinkie screams in pain while bleeding out.
Applejack jumps in front of Pinkie while Rainbow Dash gets ready to start fighting. She has her wings out and her hooves on the handle of the weapon
"Don't Touch My Friend!"
Ponymolester gave her a confused look.
"Now... technically... I didn't touch her... I shot her."
"If you wanna fight, you're getting a fight!" Applejack yells as She charges at Ponymolester in an attempt to tackles to before he could shoot anyone else.
Ponymolester simply steps to the side and dodges her attack.
Applejack attempts to punch him, while Rainbow Dash is trying to get her weapon from her back.
Ponymolester simply steps to the side and dodges her attack.
Applejack keeps trying to punch you while Rainbow Dash finally pulls out her weapon. She holds the tip of the sword to his chest and glares.
"Give Up Now.
Ponymolester simply steps to the side and dodges her attack.
Rainbow Dash tries to stab him, but Applejack and Fluttershy both grab and pull her away from you
"That's enough Dash! We cant become a monster like him!"
Applejack has a tight grip on Rainbow's legs while Fluttershy has a tight grip on her wings.
Ponymolester shoots pinkie again for the lols.
Pinkie's body twitches on the ground while everyone else looks at her in shock."PINKIE!" Fluttershy starts to tear up. Rainbow Dash breaks free, dashes over to Pinkie, and starts giving her CPR
Applejack grabs Rainbow Dash and forces her to stop with her brute strength. Everyone else stares at Pinkie as her body continues to twitch.
Ponymolester said "Lollllllllllllllllllllllllllll"
All of a sudden, Pinkie's eyes open. She looks up and stares at him with fear in her eyes.
Pinkie stutters as her eyes squint. "M.. My... head.."
Ponymolester shoots pinkie again for the lols.
Pinkie's eyes go wide before her head falls over. No one says anything as they all look down on Pinkie in shock.
"I think she died gang" Ponymolester says.
Applejack stutters, "... Why did you do that?! Why?!!"
Fluttershy finally speaks up, her voice cracking; " You... YOU MONSTER!"
"Yo gang... why are y'all down in the dumps?" Ponymolester says
Rarity looks him dead in the eyes. "How... could you do such a horrible thing? She didn't deserve that..."
Ponymolester looked down at his own hooves and squinted. "Man... you're right... I, Pony Molester, will rethink my actions"
Rainbow Dash wasn't having any of it and snapped right back, "What? Now you feel bad? You literally killed Pinkie Pie. And you expect us to be OK with that?!"
Ponymolester huffed. "I said sorry, what else am I supposed to do?"
"I... I don't know... How about NOT KILL PEOPLE???" Rainbow dash yelled.
Ponymolester pulled out a pineapple and started snacking on it. "Y'all want any?"
"Don't try to distract us. You murdered Pinkie and you still deserve to get punished for it."
"Yo, you guys like Radiohead? I think In Rainbows is underrated. Pinkie would've loved them" Ponymolester said.
This time it was Twilight who spoke up; "... What the? You literally killed someone, and now you're talking about the music that they would have liked? Is this a joke!?"
"No im talking about English rock band Radiohead, frontman Thom Yorke"
"... What the hell? You just sound weirder and weirder." Applejack looks absolutely pissed.
"Damn Applejack you need to chill" said Ponymolester
"Me? YOU NEED TO CHILL! YOU LITERALLY MURDERED OUR FRIEND, PINKIE PIE!?"
"think Hail To The Thief is one of their better albums"
Ponymolester drops an atomic bomb on pony land. All of the ponies fall to the ground, dead and smoldering. The town looks like a warzone. The main castle is on fire and many houses have been demolished.
Thom Yorke shows up "hey guys, its me, Thom Yorke" he says.
Thom Yorke stares at the wreckage and begins to smile.
"Wow... looks like I really am a creep. I may even be a weirdo."
(Laugh track plays)
Thom Yorke laughs as the camera zooms out, showing more and more devastation. Suddenly... Thom Yorke hears footsteps. He turns around to see Rainbow Dash's spirit coming towards him.
"Rainbow? Like our album???? No wayyyyyyy"
Rainbow Dash stares angrily at Thom Yorke before pointing her hoof at him and giving him a death glare.
Thom laughs; "Wtf... i wanted no surprises!"
(Laugh track plays)
Rainbow Dash suddenly flies at Thom Yorke and tackles him. The camera pans outward and upward until Rainbow is out of frame as Thom Yorke screams for his life.
