Here Today; Gone Tomorrow

Chapter Three: Whiskey & Wild

You know what makes my day? Dolls. You're never too old to play with dolls. People make insane and stories about dolls and how they "kill" but in a way, they're just like me. People say "they're real" and that they "watch you at night". They're silent but deadly. That sort of sounds like me; never certain of my next move. Never know when I just might ... snap.

I remember the first time I lost my virginity. I didn't mean for it to happen but it just did. Mom was out at work like usual, so I decided to go out. I remember what I wore too. It was a plain black top with lace sleeves and ripped black jeans. I wore my converse too. I rimmed by eyes with black eyeliner and put on some mascara. I needed to look older. This was a little after the whole scene with Daniyal. I was still pissed at him but can you really blame me? The bitch took my heart and then threw it where it couldn't be seen.

I had a fake I.D. I made it in case I ever just wanted to let go and just have fun. I went to the club. It was pretty far from my place so I took my car, a hummer. I had $200 in my pocket. I also had a switch blade in my pocket, just in case anyone tried anything. You always need protection. I needed to just let loose from the anger and frustrations.

After I was in the club, I didn't feel like dancing. There wasn't even room to dance. I was in California and there was old people rubbing on each other and the place was hot as hell. I sat down and asked for a drink. I had an Irish Whiskey. I felt like there was nothing else to do but drink. While I'm waiting for my drink, a handsome man approaches me.

"Well hello there beautilful. What are you doing here tonight?" says the mysterious man.

"Oh um. Hey. I'm just trying to get my mind of off things." I say casually. I'm not that good with people. I swear I must have looked like a lost badger.

"Well maybe I can help you with that. The name is Danniel."

My eyes grew black. The horrible flash backs came back. My heart started aching at the name; The reason I came to the damn bar in the first place. All the smiles I had with the bitch and the way he just tore me out and ripped me apart like everything was okay. When I finally thought that someone understood me and that someone loved me .... When I finally trusted someone and gave them my heart, they returned my heart with bruises.

The man had his hand out, waiting for me to shake it. Instead, I grabbed his hand, and with my other hand, I grabbed my switch blade and stabbed the man in the stomach. Nobody was paying attention because of the loud music in the background and they were to busy having a grand old time. I was in awe at first but then I ran, hoping not to get caught. I didn't even pay for my drinks.

I was a little dizzy from the amount of drinks I had already had. I knew that it wasn't going to be safe for me to drive, but did I really have a choice? I couldn't think straight and I was by myself.

"Oh hey there. I thought I was alone." said a man who looked like he was in his thirties. When he had finally got a clear sight of me, he notices I was holding my head in pain and I was walking with no balance or control. "Oh I see that you're a little wasted. Do you need a ride."

"Um .. yeah .. sure. That ... would be .. fantastic." It was hard getting the words out of my mouth properly. I gave him my keys and he chuckled. "Ms., I'm gonna give you a ride in my car. I'll just tow your car with mine."

I nodded at his words. He helped me up into his tow truck. I told him where I lived and he drove me there. As I am walking up to my front door he looks at me. "Are you sure you're gonna be okay by yourself? You still seem wasted."

"Well, I'm okay... But I wouldn't mind some company. I'm always alone."

The man smiled at me. "You're a very beautiful girl", he glides his hand through my hair. "How could you be alone on a Saturday night?"

I smiled to the ground. He picked my chin up with his finger and kissed me passionately and as weird as it sounds, I really liked it.

"Why don't you open the door? I can give you the best night of your life." He said smiling. "I would really like that." I said. I opened the door, his hand in mine. "My name is Christopher by the way. I'm 35 years old. What about you?"

"I'll tell you after you give me the best night of my life" I tease. That is how I first lost my virginity. My relationship with Christopher did go pretty far, farther than I had expected, but it's how we broke up that ruined way more than my heart, but my sanity as well.