I could feel the burn as it slid down my throat and down into the pit of my stomach, adding to the previous mixtures of whatever was in the red plastic cups on the counter. It wasn't the taste that made me come back, because that was awful, it was the fact that as I came closer and closer to my end, something always saved me. I always liked being saved because it made me feel wanted on this earth, but not this time. This time, I hoped to get away with something I've been trying to do for the past three years. Living off thrill only lasts for so long before it turns into a routine and a numbing sensation running through my whole body. And when I can't feel anything, it's like I'm not even alive.
***
Trying to open the aspirin bottle pisses me off, I can't press down hard enough on the lid to turn the cap and get the pills. When I finally get the fucker off, I throw it to the ground and pour the tablets into my palm. I can feel the invisible eyes pressuring me to take the correct number, but I push past them. Cupping my hand, I put eight pills in my mouth and swallow them dry. They go down slower than usual, so I take a sip out of the cup on my nightstand and feel the relief of them slide down. A couple minutes later, my legs weaken and fold beneath me. As I fall down in slow motion, the name of someone I used to know is repeating in my head. It started as a whisper but quickly faded into nothing. My head hit the ground, bounced once, and I was out.
YOU ARE READING
Dreaming Under the Influence
Dla nastolatkówLauren is struggling with past demons that land her in some serious trouble. While trying to move on from the tragedy that struck her already miserable life, she finds light. Andrew can't fix Lauren, but he tries. While in the process of falling in...
