Wrong selection

15.

Warning ❗️ suicidal thoughts skip if u can't handle ...

Freen's PoV
I opened my eyes and it was a little blurry. I was laying on my bed and wait what Seng is smiling at me. Like he had never smiled at me like this. I was wondering what's wrong. By then he said "Baby we are having a mini me coming."

I was hell shocked. What? I'm pregnant. Fuck .. he said "Well why did u lie to me that u were on ur periods?"

I was silent my mind was blank all I could think about was Becky. I should've not let her this close.

Seng added "Well I'm forgiving u this time my love please take care of urself and the little me. And forgive me for my past deeds. Let's start a new I'll love you very much please forgive me."

Now I was lost. I wanted to give him a chance when I'm having a baby already. But what about Becky. She's my happiness. No Sarocha don't think of her. You are married and he's ur husband. He's telling you he'll love you from now and maybe he'll change for the sake of baby.

I was lost completely. My mind had it's own fight going on. I don't know what to do. Seng held my hand and kissed it softly and hugged me. But I can feel nothing towards him. Literally nothing. I don't love him anymore but I can forgive him because of the child we're having.

But... Becky.. stop Freen stop thinking. Seng said "Freen My love you are not talking anything yet?"

I said bringing myself out of thoughts "Hmm .."

He said "aren't u happy about the baby Freen??!"

I said "No I'm happy about it Seng. I'm just.. thinking..."

Seng said "No need to think my love it's not good for ur health. You should rest now. Wait I'll tell servants to bring you food and eat your meds too doctor has said to take care it shouldn't happen like last time.."

Yeah last time I had a miscarriage and from tht day he started to treat me like shit. It wasn't my fault he gave me something to eat which I should've not eaten in my pregnancy. Well he never loved me but only his baby. I just nodded and he left. Now I was all alone . I locked the room door and broke down crying.

What the fuck is happening in my life?! I thought everything would be fine because I just believed Becky. She would get me out of here. But what why did I even become pregnant.! God Why are you so cruel on me.? Why can't I be happy? Is it my past bad deeds I did to my parents by leaving them for the sake of Seng. I'm sorry god sorry. Please forgive me. I want to literally die.

Why on the earth should you give me this much pain? Now Becky would never see me again. I'm so bad . Why am I even alive. I can't make anything right. I'm so wrong as a person. I'm a mistake. I should just take and knife and Stab myself but I don't have the guts.

I'm so weak. I can't fight for myself. I'm scared. I'm completely dumb. I can only make mistakes and hurt others. Becky I'm really sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. I'm so bad at this. I cry out loud. I wiped my tears but it wasn't stopping. I wasn't able to breathe. My whole body was going numb.

But then... I remembered I have a baby inside me. Shh Freen calm down. Calm down... shh everything will be ok. Everything will be fine. Take deep breathes. Slowly come on. Shh... I got up went to washroom and washed my face which was filled with tears. My nose was red I wiped my face properly and came out by then maid had bought me my food.

I told her to keep on my table and she left. I sat down and ate a little I don't want my little one who has nothing to do with me Seng or Becky to starve. I ate and just laid down. My whole mind just thought about Becky. I hurt her. Probably god will make me suffer more . I'm never going to get happiness and peace in my life.

.................

Ok guys so much of emotions that I felt just now. 😮‍💨. I feel the same from the past few days. I feel hell inside me . I miss my happiness a lot. My person a lot. I wish they're happy and doing good . I hope u all r doing good. Don't get deep involvement in the story you will surely cry if u do so. A warning ❗️