My Guardian Angel✔️

45: A total mess

A total mess.

Living here was a total mess.

First of all, dealing with Mr.Davids and his ignorance towards me. Perhaps I can say that it's not 'hate' but just a strong dislike towards my place in the family, not me as a person. Even then, it was tiring to live in a place where the person I should be considering as my 'adoptive father' wouldn't even care about my existence here. As I said, I do understand him. But it's not my fault that my father was a murderer and a criminal. Heck, even I didn't know after living with him for sixteen years. As a kid who had no family except her father and friends, I still wished for more fatherly love - which, currently, only Mr.Davids could give me but he obviously wouldn't.

I'm far from being anywhere near to his daughter. I could understand that, I was mature enough to know.

However, I was being showered much care by a new motherly figure in my life, Mrs.Davids - or mom, as I call her now. I had a brother too, Lucas Davids. Both of these people loved me to the core and I loved them back as well. I sometimes wondered if they loved me because of my identity or because they were trying to replace their own daughter using me, due to extreme trauma. Different people have different reactions to trauma - some tend to deny it and get aggressive at anyone who disagrees, like Mr.Davids, while others might try to replace or change the situation somehow. Maybe mom and Lucas love me only because I'm almost close to their own daughter's age, but hey, who cares? At least I'm not abandoned at some street side, begging for money and food. Ha, imagine that, the rich and famous June Jacobs, the precious daughter of Jean Jacobs, begging for food on the streets. It'll be a hot news for the media and my old classmates. Sally, Trent and Ava would've loved it. Well, maybe not Ava, she's changed a lot now. She really is regretful about everything she did to me.

Anyways, I didn't ignore Mr.Davids like he ignored me. When he said all those things about my father at first and I was unaware about it then, I did start to hate him, but after realizing everything and coming to my senses, I realized that Andrew Davids was far more of a better person and father than my father could ever be. He was very carefree and talkative to all the others, especially his wife, but to me, he never talked much except if it was something important. At least it progressed much better than the first week here when he hated even the sight of me.

Then there's the doctor who treated me, Emily. She wasn't Lucas' girlfriend. She just came to be some family friend and Lucas' best friend from college. She came by every weekend and examined my mental and physical health whenever she could. She was an extremely nice woman, a bold one too, someone who possessed a role model figure to me.

Ava was nice to me, but she always looked guilty when she talked to me, though she tried not to show it much.

So, basically, I lived just like an outcast here. No real family, no real friends, just a living corpse. At the same time, I couldn't blame anyone for that. I really wasn't a part of them, so why would they care? The only reason Lucas rescued me and brought me here was because he was a good person, he knew me from before, and of course, pity. But that doesn't mean that they're supposed to treat me like a family member and look after me like a princess or anything. Both Alice Davids and Lucas treated me like family though, especially Lucas, who loved to keep me company all the time after he returned home from work. Maybe it's because he thought that I would try to hurt myself or kill myself if I were alone, but it's obvious that he cared. And once again the question arose in my mind - why? Why does he care so much? The exact same question I had about Jasper.

A few weeks later, the parents and Lucas made a decision to move to a town a bit far away for both my safety as well as a break from all the things that happened here. I was pretty okay with this, since I did agree with them, except that my safety wasn't a concern to me any longer. I had already gone through the worst thing that I could ever imagine, why should I fear it now? I faced death; it doesn't worry me anymore. But taking a break was definitely crucial, especially from my friends, whom I might see if I ever go out. And then I'd have to explain everything, which wasn't something I was ready to do.