dreamz

park night 01

old story

if you've read my book changes, this is the chapter that I made prior that inspired me to write it.

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Amerie's POV
The park 10pm

Why was I planning to go out at 10pm on a school day at the park? To stay out of my house. An only child who's been living with her parents divorce since she was 9. My mom constantly blaming it on me and I constantly have to deal with it because I only get to see my dad on weekdays.

She's a drinker, a heavy drinker...

When she gets drunk, filled with beer, patron, henny, and allat she's aggressive. And that's what happened tonight and honestly I can't deal with the name calling.

"Amerie!!! You're not good enough."

"We'd still be together if it wasn't for your bitch ass!!"

"Amerie buy me some more drinks!!"

"You're a shitty daughter!!"

"If I could I'd give you to your father full custody and never ask to see you again!!"

FYI: my dad has constantly tried to get full custody of me but my mom puts up her front and claims my father to be many things and they believe her. But when I graduate, I'm out her place with the quickness.

Just one more headass year here...

But after she does all of that business it's back to normal. Well our normal. When I wake up the house is cleaned down and she cooks. She smiles and laughs with me like she had never said the words she had spoken to me the night before.

It's mind racking seeing someone just completely shift all the time and not knowing when it will occur or how long you can handle this for much longer.

I walked quietly through the house leaving through the front door. Earlier I had heard her screaming and laughing with the tv blasting, the sound of empty bottles hitting the glass living room table. Then suddenly there was silence, I took the chance to leave with my phone, earphones, keys and some fruit snacks.

My plan was to take the short walk to the park so I could clear my head of everything. School stressing me out, my mom, my lack of friends because of my trust issues and self-sabotaging mindset...along with many other things.

The street lights were on and as I walked by the little kids's play area my phone began to ring.

mother is calling...

I just stood waiting for the call screen to go away before putting my phone on do not disturb. The one time I take my phone off DND she wants to call.

Fall in NY...

Well early fall, I can chill in a hoodie without a coat and be perfectly fine. That's what I was doing right now, dressed in a random grey hoodie, black leggings and my 4 retros.

I put in my earphones and went to Apple Music, finding J Cole's album Born Sinner. J Cole had to be my favorite artist ever ever everrrr. After I chose Land Of The Snakes, I put my phone in my hoodie and walked towards the swings.

This the shit I used to roll down Lewis Street with
Lord, know some hoes from the past
Like, "Damn Cole, wish I knew that you would be rich"
Well, shoulda asked
It's funny how these niggas on some real "be cool with me" shit
I bag two bitches like it's two of me, bitch