Mendacious

#4

silence. ringing. a click.

you say nothing. you can't. all that would be heard were sputtered sounds and sobs and the terrible feeling of being pathetic.

"i... i never meant to hurt you."

shuffling, sniffing and quiet murmuring is heard from the other side. your heart breaks--how that was even still possible was a mystery to you, since it already felt so broken-- and you shut the feelings invading you out.

"i really do love you. no matter if you believe me or not. that won't change."

"..."

"you have every right to hate me. i would too."

"..."

"what the fuck do you want me to say alex?! huh?! that i'm lying to you?! that this was all a joke to torture you?! because... trust me, it's not. and i won't lie to you just so you can feel better about what happened. believe what you want, but i wouldn't be able to live with myself if i lied to you."

"..."

"okay. i don't know what to say anymore. i guess... whatever we have or had or could ever have... is over? are we done for good? should we just go back to life and forget all the moments, memories and actions that made us fall in love with each other? should we just... pretend this was all a dream? a beautiful dream that faded as soon as we woke up? and i know a big part of how this turned out was my fault, but... you had your part. i- i don't know what more to do or say to you. so goodbye. for good this time."

that word... it is so final. goodbye. is it really time to let go?

"why did you do it? why are you still doing it?"

"..."

"goodbye taylor."

silence. a click. end of call.