The Other Brother

No Longer as We were

There are no words to describe the feeling of pain that a heart break can cause you. You feel as if your whole world is falling apart, you feel as if you can't breathe at times.
It's a never ending pain until you come to terms with your situation. There's no proper way to get over a heart break. That's something everyone learns to cope on their own. At first your emotions are everywhere and you can't contain them. It hurts the most when you have to keep going no matter your circumstances. Everyday was almost the same. Crying, laying in bed, crying some more, sleeping from the exhaustion of crying, then crying some more. It felt like a never ending cycle of distraught. Some days I missed him, some days I resented him, but as the days grew into weeks I found myself resenting him more than missing him. There simply was nothing to miss from him.
The betrayal, the trust, the time and effort I put in just simply parished. It meant nothing to him the moment he laid with another woman, so why should it matter to me? Why do I get to be sad over a man who can't be happy with just one woman in his life? That was no longer the Rindou Haitani I once knew. That man was no longer anything to me.

It had been a a week since the market.
I had come to my decision on what I wanted to do.
For the first time in what felt like forever, I unlocked my phone and texted him.
Two days after that text there I was sitting in front of him. He looked well rested, well fed. Him sitting in front of me in the well condition he was in, proved to me everything further more. This made me more firm on my decision.
"I missed you y/n."
He spoke to break the silence.
I clenched my jaw at those words. Missed me?
"You? Missed me?"
I chuckled.
"Whatever I did to make you upset, we can fix it. We're a team remember? Everything is fixable."
He was lying straight to my face, acting like he did no wrong yet again.
"This relationship became incapable of being fixed the moment you put your dick in some other woman Rindou."
His expression dropped as those words rolled off my tongue.
"What..? What are you-"
I cut him short of his lies.
"Don't even try to act like you don't know what i'm talking about Rindou. Don't play fucking dumb with me."
He sat there mouth wide, in shock.
I set a file of papers down on the table in front of him.
"Why should I have to suffer the consequences of your actions? It's not fair to me. This is my last straw with you. We're done."
I got up out of my seat and grabbed my bag. 
Just as I was getting up Rindou grabbed my wrist.
"Is this because of Ran?! He set this up didn't he? You're seriously divorcing me over something that he has no proof of even happening? I would never cheat on you y/n."
He had a pained, panicked look on his face. I could tell his mind was racing of What should I say? What do I do now?
"How do you explain the day I came home on our anniversary huh? I saw you in our bed with some slut you picked up from the club. OUR BED."
I ripped my hand from his grasp.
"It was our anniversary..?"
He looked at me, tears building up in his eyes. But this only infuriated me more. I raised my hand to him, my hand came into contact with the skin of his face, I slapped him.
"That's all you have to say to me?! After everything I put up with over the years that we've been together. This is your repayment to me?! I get no i'm sorry y/n, thank you y/n for always sticking by my side, I appreciate you y/n. I get nothing from you!"
Tears rolled down my face as I screamed at him. My body was trembling with rage. I was overcome with so many emotions. I was so tired of it.
"Y/n I love you.."
The tears from his eyes slowly dripped down to his chin as he said those words.
"Love? You call that love? That's some fucked up way of showing you love me."
I brushed past him.
"We're done here. I'll have Ran grab my stuff in a few days."
I walked out of there, not looking back once.
This chapter of my life was coming to an end. We were no longer as we were.

I opened the car door and just sat there in my seat, trying to hold back the tears as they poured from my eyes.
A hand gently patted my head.
"Let's get you home y/n. Everything will be ok."
I looked up, my eyes meeting Ran's. 
"Why did it have to be me..?"
My lip quivered as words were trying to find there way out.
Ran pulled me into a tight embrace.
"I hope you know that this has nothing to do with you, but everything to do with my brother. None is this is your fault."
I sat there quietly sobbing in his arms, grasping to his arms tightly. My body was trembling profusely.
This was a pain I never wanted to feel again.
In these past weeks i've never felt so alone and small. I felt as if I didn't mean a thing. I hated this feeling more than anything, I wanted to disappear, I just wanted it to stop.

I can't take it anymore Ran.. please help me..