Ghost (Willicia)

A\N: This is another tragic/romance Willicia oneshot. This genre is all I seem to be writing now but I'm not complaining one bit.  I hope you enjoy, Angels.

TGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGW

Youngblood thinks there's always tomorrow
I miss your touch on nights when I'm hollow
I know you crossed a bridge that I can't follow

Since the love that you left is all that I get
I want you to know

That if I can't be close to you
I'll settle for the ghost of you
I miss you more than life (more than life)
And if you can't be next to me
Your memory is ecstasy
I miss you more than life
I miss you more than life

Youngblood thinks there's always tomorrow
I need more time but time can't be borrowed
I'd leave it all behind if I could follow

Since the love that you left is all that I get

I want you to know

That if I can't be close to you
I'll settle for the ghost of you
I miss you more than life (yeah)
And if you can't be next to me
Your memory is ecstasy (oh)
I miss you more than life
I miss you more than life

Whoa
Na, na-na
More than life
(Oh)

So if I can't get close to you
I'll settle for the ghost of you
But I miss you more than life
And if you can't be next to me
Your memory is ecstasy
I miss you more than life
I miss you more than life

He's always been a constant reminder  in her life, even when he's no longer here. She sees him everywhere: she sees him out of the corner of her eye just for a second, but he's always gone, disappearing when she turns to fully face him. She smells his scent sometimes, even on stuff she's not worn for him, she sees him at the foot of her bed, or sitting beside her, just watching her sleep like he used to, but when she flips on the light, he's gone. 

She knows it's her mind conjuring him up, she knows she's only seeing his ghost, reliving her memories, or hallucinations, but she doesn't care, as long as she keeps seeing him, even for a second or a minute. She wants to keep seeing, smelling, and hallucinating  him for as long as possible, for however long she can, though it's possible or even remotely healthy.

She never thought he would be killed, murdered, not in a court room, doing something he loved and worked so hard to achieve, she thought, hoped, he'd die surrounded by family, old and grey, but he wasn't: he was alone, and young. 

She's on her fourth glass of wine, alone in the apartment, Zach and Grace are with Peter this weekend, so she can do whatever she wants which isn't any different these days, not since Will's death, when she hears his voice from somewhere in the apartment. 

"I think you've had enough." He says, she whips her head around to where his voice is: he's sitting down on the floor, back against the wall, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, throwing a baseball with one hand and catching it with the other hand, looking casual and alive. "I don't." She responds, her voice slurred, taking another big sip of the wine. He's always been worried about how much she drinks since he found her passed out outside his apartment at Georgetown their second year. 

"Alicia." Will says. He's sitting on the coffee table now, beside the wine bottle that's nearly empty, his baseball nowhere in sight. She wants to reach out and touch, convince herself that he is real, that the last few weeks, months, have been one big nightmare, but even while tipsy, she  knows that she's seeing his ghost, an hallucination, a figment of her imagination. 

"This isn't you." Will says gently. Alicia laughs hollowly. "It is now." She answers. 

"Leesh, stop! I'm dead and you can't change that, no matter how much you want to. You can't change what's happened to me, but you can change how you deal with it. Leesh, I hate what my death has done to you." Alicia chokes on a sob. 

"You died without knowing how much I loved you and what I was going to do in order to show you how much I loved you." Tears threaten to spill down her face. She had a plan she was going to do in order to be with him:  she was going divorce Peter, citing that she didn't want to try and make it work because it wasn't working between them, that he had hurt her one too many times to make it work again, that the divorce was long overdue and it was what was best for her, then go to his apartment or the office, wherever he was, and apologise for betraying him, and Diane, before confessing to him that she loved him, and kissing with all the love and passion she could muster. 

Will is kneeling down in front of her now, his hands in hers. Even though he's a ghost, every touch, every look he's given her, every word he's said, feels as real as they did when he was alive. 

"I knew that you loved me, Alicia.  I knew that you did. I knew that everyday. I loved you too, but we've always had bad timing, we've always said that. We could never find good timing, not even for an hour, apart from the Presidential Suite. I was thankful for that hour which turned into a night, which then turned into the best few months of my life because I finally had you, if only for a little while. Bad timing, that's all. I never fell out of love with you, not once. When I was dying on the court room floor, I was only thinking of you, and only you, because I loved you until my dying breath, and even now, I still love you." Will tells her passionately before bringing his lips to hers in their last ever kiss, kissing her one finally time. 

She pulls away from his lips and hugs him hard, the wine glass falling from her hand, shattering into a river of glass and wine, but she doesn't care. 

"I'll love you forever." She says with a sob. Will's arms tighten around her. 

"I'm okay with that." Will replies as he buries his face into her hair one last time. 

"Maybe someday, somewhere, we can have good timing." Alicia says as she reluctantly draws back from Will. He tucks a lock of brunette hair behind her ear, cupping her cheek, she leans into the touch, their eyes meeting, possibly for the last time. 

"Yeah, maybe." He agrees. "I've always loved you, Alicia, don't you ever forget that." 

"I love you too, Will, and I won't ever forget it." 

Alicia watches as Will Gardner fades before her, forever this time. She knows he won't be back to 'visit' her ever again, but that's okay. She doesn't need his ghost anymore: 

She has memories and knows that the ghost of him will always be with her, even if she can't always see him. 

TGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGWTGW

A\N: This song is a Justin Bieber one from his album titled Justice.  I cried while writing parts of this. I have more Willicia and McHart stories to write, but for now, enjoy this one, Angels.