Wishing For Serenity

Indulge

Serenity POV

After 12 long years of me being mingled now it feels like im a freed pigeon
this elated feeling! that finally, you can choose yourself

Magagawa mo na atlast ang mga gusto mong gawin

the dream that you always want to achieve, a smile on my lips that i never wanted to fade, no heartaches, no self pity and no unbearable harsh words

But that idea is just temporary because you still wanted to be with the person that hindrance all what you wish for

How Ironic! you want to choose your peace but you still want to dwell with your demons

I cant even remember how everything started, we are kind of couple whom people will jealous with

People admire us for being 12 years together, an epitome of a perfect couple indeed  but they never know what lies behind what they are adored

Sobra ako kung magmahal, i gave everthing even in my lowest and almost nothing I still give what is remain kasi hindi naman basta basta gumigive up pag mahal mo ang tao

Kahit na hindi mo na nakukuha ang mga gusto mo sa kasusuporta sa taong mahal mo
I am content,, yeah I am content seeing him grow and have his success, at some point nakukuha ko rin yung gusto ko dahil sa tulong nya.. And Im thankful pero bakit may kulang bakit hindi sapat yung mga bagay bagay

Thats when i realize na ang mga pangarap ko noon bago ko sya nakilala ay hindi ko na pala pinupursue dahil kailangan kong limitahan para sa kanya because he doesnt want me to gusto nyang andyan lang ako para sa kanya.. And ofcourse i am happy to be with him, pero sa tinagal tagal ng panahon nakikita kong Im not his partner anymore Im just there beacuse of convenience kasi kahit anong gawin nya im still always there willing to accept and willing to forgive

Ilang taon ko na ring nararamdaman yun pero iniintindi ko parin kasi nga mahal ko, ganun naman dapat diba?

But everything has its limits, hindi pala sapat ang pagmamahal para maging masaya, if you gain a lot of pain and  compromises

And now Im here choosing to be alone, choosing to go back to my old self who I myself left it behind

Iniwan ko muna ang business ko sa kapatid kong si Hope for this vacation sya na rin kasi ang nag pupush sakin to do it

Flashback

"ate, wag ka nang mag mukmok dyan.. eto" 

nakatayo na pala sya sa harap ko, im gawking while in front of my computer doing nothing, tiningnan ko ang inilahad ni Hope shes my sister anyway, a plane ticket?

Tiningnan ko lang sya ng may pagtatanong

"huwag mo naman akong tingnan ng ganyan as if di mo alam ang hawak ko, pinapalayas na kita sa sarili mong shop ahahhahahahhaha"

tawang tawang sabi nya

"buang" sabi ko sabay hablot sa plane ticket
Manila to Iloilo one trip

"yeah yeahh.. Just one trip sulitin mo na yan tsaka kailangan mo yan ate matagal mo na ring plano yang vacation alone trip mo diba
And i think this is the perfect time"

Sabi nya na tumataas taas pa ang kilay
Siguro nga ito na yung perfect time

"okay, so Iloilo?" sagot ko

"why not! its been a while, ako na kapunta pa twice pero ikaw since your with Kuya Nujin wala kanang time umuwi ng Iloilo"  sumimangot ako sa sinabi nya