My head played back the memories.
The sweet, the bitter, the sour, and the umami.
I yearn for you, I would always yearn for you.
My heart and soul, aches for you.
Even if they were the ones to sound the alarm, the alert.
They were also the same to yearn for your call.
I find myself, here again.
Standing ever so still.
In this garden, my purgatory.
In this garden, my destructed home.
I start to move, for what felt like hours, days, months.
I hear my feet against the harsh concrete,
I feel the various cuts I'm sustaining,
Red trails behind, as I continued.
I stare into the garden I've set fire to,
because of what you've told me.
It wasn't your words that hurt me,
it was the way your eyes looked at me.
With such boredom, and such hatred.
Unfair, is what it is.
It is unfair to you,
for which I cannot sustain myself for you no longer.
It is unfair to me,
that you've decided that discarding me was the easier task.
It is unfair to us,
that I wasn't able to hold us together anymore,
that time felt like we were not meant to be.
Like a rubber band,
I've been pulled to exceed my limits.
You've pulled me to exceed what I can withstand, but even then,
I still loved you.
I loved you.
I loved you like ketamine, cocaine and cigarettes.
I loved you like flowers, rain and the breeze.
These flowers I tore up with my hands.
That night, when I dug my hands into the hard soil,
crimson flowing from my fingertips.
The soil, the leaves, the roots and petals flew,
but they no longer swayed with the wind.
They would no longer sway, nor respond, ever again.
- Purgatory
