Chanbaek Fics

12 (slight angst)

Title: unconventional

Posted on: LiveJournal (chanbaekmemoirs)
Author: nestine (baekmesomeyeol)

everything by nestine is one of the best ones i've read! the story is still making me uncomfotable because it looks like it's still not going to end well.

It was past midnight when Chanyeol finally got off work, stepping out of the gas station convenience store into the chilly October air and zipping his jacket up over his uniform. He pulled the hood up to cover his head and started walking. Usually, he liked to stay on the well-lit streets when he walked home after late night shifts, but since he was feeling unusually tired tonight he decided to take a more direct route instead by cutting through a few alleyways. His trip was rather uneventful until he got a bit closer to his building and noticed someone leaning against the side of the brick wall slightly ahead of him.


"Hey," Chanyeol heard the guy say as he walked by and he turned back slightly to see if he was actually talking to him, even though he was the only person around as far as he knew. He didn't get a chance to respond as he was quite distracted by the other's attire which was likely what was intended. A skin tight black t-shirt with a low v-neck and almost equally tight jeans with holes ripped up all along the front even though the current temperature would have most people wearing a coat.


"You interested?" the guy asked after a few seconds, bringing Chanyeol back out of his thoughts.


"N-No." Chanyeol answered after a slight delay once he understood what he was asking. He immediately stopped staring at the guy's body and raised his line of vision a bit higher to a more appropriate level. There was something familiar about this guy, but Chanyeol couldn't figure out why and was still staring, although at least at his face now. Then he figured it out. He's only seen him a few other times and he wasn't wearing the eyeliner that he is now or clothes like this, but the terrible blonde dye job fading to brown at the roots was unmistakable unless he was more exhausted than he thought and none of this was actually happening.


Chanyeol's lingering stare only made the other think it was worth offering again. He casually slid his hands into the pockets of his jeans, tugging the waistband down just far enough to make it obvious that he wasn't wearing any underwear. "Are you sure?" he asked again, running his tongue across his lips. "I'll do whatever you want for the right price." he added trying not to sound as desperate for a taker as he was at this point.


"I-I know you." Chanyeol just blurted out in awkward response.



As soon as he said it, the shorter seemed to drop the seduction act and there was a hint of worry


on his face. "What..?" he muttered as he started looking more closely at Chanyeol's face to figure out how he knew him.


"I mean I don't actually know you. I live next to you... in 6C." Chanyeol explained.


"Oh..." he breathed a sigh of relief trying to think of which neighbor he was, but quickly realized it was definitely the tall, hot one. "Yeah, I think I've seen you around... I just didn't recognize you with that hood on." The shorter pointed out, glad that it wasn't anyone that really knew him. "I... I'll give you a good deal since we're neighbors..?" he continued to press with seemingly no shame.


"No... thanks." Chanyeol said, a little surprised at the other's persistence. "I've gotta go..." he told him and quickly started walking in the direction of his. He looked back once just to make sure that he didn't just imagine all of that because that was started to feel like a likely scenario. The few times Chanyeol had seen his neighbor before, he had given him a completely different impression and he wasn't really sure what to think of him now.








A few days later Chanyeol woke up in the middle of the night to a loud knocking on his front door. He opened his eyes enough to look at the clock by his bed and saw that it was almost three in the morning and he rolled over to go back to sleep. A few seconds later there was more knocking so he reluctantly got up to answer it. He checked to see who it was first and furrowed his brow before opening the door.


"Hey, can I come in?" his neighbor asked in a quiet voice.


Normally, Chanyeol wouldn't have let a stranger, well maybe acquaintance now, into his apartment in the middle of the night, but the other looked a bit worried and also pretty harmless. "...uh sure." he mumbled and opened the door enough to let him inside. He wasn't quite awake enough to form coherent sentences so after he closed the door he just waited for the other to explain why he was waking him up in the middle of the night.


"I'm sorry, I know it's late." he apologized first, noticing Chanyeol's disheveled appearance. "There's this guy following me and I didn't want him to know where I live... but don't worry, I'm not staying. I just need to get out on the fire escape and I think I can get to my window from there."


As odd of a request as it was, Chanyeol just wanted to go back to sleep so he agreed to whatever would get him back in his bed faster. "Yeah, whatever." he sighed and pointed to one of the windows in the living that the shorter hurried to, probably realizing he was overstaying what little welcome he had in the first place. He fidgeted with the lock on the window for longer than necessary and Chanyeol realized it was stuck so he went to help him. "I forgot about the lock, it's kind of broken." he said, not sounding as sleepy anymore and starting to hit the window frame around the lock.



"I'm sorry about the other night." The shorter said after a few seconds, but Chanyeol didn't seem to be paying attention. "It's the end of the month and I... I've been getting a little desperate I guess." he tried to explain, but still not getting any acknowledgement from Chanyeol.


After a particularly forceful hit there was a metallic clinking and Chanyeol pulled the window open, getting a slight chill from the cold air. "It was just... strange." Chanyeol said in delayed response. "I never thought you..." he trailed off as he realized no matter what he said it wouldn't sound good. "It's no big deal, forget about it." he said instead.


The shorter nodded and climbed out to the old metal scaffolding with surprising ease, leaning back in before Chanyeol got a chance to close the window. "My name is Baekhyun, by the way." he said with a small smile and waited expectantly for an introduction from the other.


"Chanyeol..." he grumbled when he realized Baekhyun wasn't going to move until he at least gave up his name.


"Thanks for helping me, Chanyeol." he said with a bigger smile this time. "I owe you one." he added before leaving to climb into his own window a short distance away.








Thankfully, being woken up in the middle of the night didn't become a regular occurrence. In fact, he didn't see his neighbor again after that. Mostly because he had gone back to his regular route home from work to avoid running into him like the first time again. He finally stopped to get his mail after work one night; he had a bad habit of forgetting to do so for weeks at a time. He grabbed the decent sized handful and hurried up the stairs to his floor. Once he was inside his apartment he just tossed the mail down on the counter. He hadn't planned on looking through it just yet, but there was a small envelope that caught his attention before he could walk away. There was no address on it, just his name and he wondered where it came from. He ran his finger under the seal and opened it. The first thing he saw was money and then he noticed a torn piece of paper with a note written.



THANKS FOR LETTING ME IN THE OTHER NIGHT. I ENDED UP GETTING ENOUGH MONEY FOR RENT AND A LITTLE EXTRA SO I HOPE THIS MAKES UP FOR BEING A BOTHER. SEE YOU AROUND.

–BAEKHYUN


Chanyeol read the note again and shook his head to himself before shoving the envelope, with the money still inside, into his pocket and going to make himself something to eat.


A little later as he was eating, he heard some knocking outside in the hall. It was too quiet to be someone knocking on his door so he ignored it at first, but the knocking continued and even got louder, accompanied by some yelling he couldn't quite make out. It was starting to get annoying so he

abandoned his half-eaten sandwich and went to see what was going on.


In the hall there was an older man, maybe forty-something, standing outside Baekhyun's door, still knocking. Chanyeol had never seen him before and didn't know why he would be knocking on Baekhyun's door so relentlessly. "Hey, you've been knocking for like five minutes. I don't think anyone's gonna answer." Chanyeol said to him.


The other guy didn't even bother looking over in his direction. "He's in there. I know he's is."


"We'll then it doesn't fucking look like he wants to talk to you, does it?" Chanyeol said back, a bit ruder this time, probably just because he already had a pretty shitty day and this guy seemed like a good person to let it out on.


He seem to be giving up though, as he backed away from the door some. "Fine, whatever." he said and turned toward the stairwell to leave. "...just a fucking whore anyway..." he mumbled to himself when he left, but Chanyeol still caught it and had to hold back the urge to say something else to him.

Once he was out of sight, Chanyeol reached up to knock on Baekhyun's door. Chanyeol wondered if he would even answer after ignoring the other guy's knocking for so long, but after a few seconds the door opened a small amount.


"Is he gone?" Baekhyun almost whispered from his doorway.


"Yeah, what was his problem?" Chanyeol asked, even though he probably didn't want to know the answer.


Baekhyun even looked hesitant to respond at first. "He's that same guy that was following me before. We..." he paused to think of a not so crude way to phrase it. "...he paid for stuff... once, but he did things that I didn't agree to so I told him I wasn't doing anything with him after that. Then he started following me and I guess he ended up figuring out where I live... but thanks for getting him to leave."


Chanyeol was right, he didn't really want to know all that. Then he remembered his mail and pulled out the envelope he'd stuck in his back pocket earlier. "Here." he said, handing it to Baekhyun. "I don't want the money." Baekhyun wasn't reaching to take the envelope back and only looked down at it briefly, frowning slightly. "You might need it..." Chanyeol added and held his hand out further.


After a few more seconds Baekhyun finally took the envelope. "How can I repay you for helping me then?" he asked with subtle implications in his voice that Chanyeol wasn't currently picking up on.


"You don't have to." Best Chanyeol could tell by the other's expression, that wasn't an acceptable answer, but he didn't really know what to tell him. "Maybe one day I'll need some help so you can return the favor then, okay?"

Baekhyun sighed at the other's obliviousness. "Okay..."


"I need to finish eating so I'll see you later I guess." Chanyeol said before going back into his own apartment.








Chanyeol was still in a pretty bad mood when he got to work the next day, but the customers didn't expect anything other than a bad attitude from him anyway. He really just wanted the day to be over so he could go home because he actually managed to get two days off in a row which almost never happened and he was ready to make the most of it by doing absolutely nothing and probably sleeping all day. After nine there weren't many customers coming in anymore so Chanyeol had to reading a gossip magazine from the counter to keep himself entertained. Probably around ten the chime by the door went off and he looked up from the magazine he was reading just to make sure he wasn't about to get robbed because it wouldn't be the first time. He wasn't expecting to see Baekhyun walk in, although the other didn't seem to notice him. He just walked toward the back where the coolers were and Chanyeol stayed there watching him until someone else decided to walk in, immediately coming to the counter.


"Box of Camel menthols." the elderly man stated, putting his money on the counter. Chanyeol quickly rang up the cigarettes and he didn't think it could have taken more than forty five seconds, but once the man left he scanned the store and didn't see Baekhyun anywhere. He thought he must have slipped out while he wasn't paying attention and went back to reading.


"Hey." someone said a few minutes later, startling Chanyeol from his focus on the page. He looked up to see Baekhyun setting a drink on the counter to buy. "What are you reading?" he asked glancing down at the magazine.


The taller quickly shoved it under the counter. "Nothing..." he said, quickly, not wanting the other to think he actually liked reading trashy gossip magazines.


"So you work here?" Baekhyun questioned like it was something strange and reached down to grab a pack of gum, setting it next to his drink.


"Yeah." the other replied while ringing up the two items. "It's a job." he shrugged, feeling the need to defend his choice of employment, but considering Baekhyun's means of income it was probably unneeded. Ever since he ran into him on the street that night, he's had trouble keeping his mind from thinking about what he does with these strangers that are willing to pay and now was no exception. "Three sixty two." he told Baekhyun to distract himself from getting too imaginative because now was not the time. The shorter pulled some bills out of his pocket which ended up being exactly four dollars and handed it to him.


"I don't want the change." he said with a small smile before grabbing his things and heading out the door.


When Chanyeol got off work shortly after he decided to take the shortcut again, but only because it was quicker. Not because he wanted to see Baekhyun and not because maybe he worried about him. It was just quicker. He did find Baekhyun leaning against the same wall he saw him at the first time. He planned on just walking past, but Baekhyun started walking with him when he went by.


"Hey, do you want to hang out sometime?" the shorter asked rather abruptly.


"Why are you asking me that?" he hesitantly questioned in return.


"I don't know." Baekhyun admitted because he really didn't know why. "I thought since we live next to each other maybe we could be friends."


Chanyeol wasn't sure if that sounded like a good idea. Friends were a lot of work and he kind of hated people. He thought it over for a few more seconds before replying. "What did you have in mind?" he asked, not quite sure if he was actually agreeing to it yet or not.


Baekhyun shrugged his shoulders. He'd asked sort of impulsively and wasn't prepared to come up with real plans. "Whatever people do with their friends." He shrugged.


That was no help to Chanyeol for making a decision, but he found it easier to say yes than no. "I don't work tomorrow." he told the other. "I guess you could come over if you wanted."


"Alright." Baekhyun replied. "I gotta go... I'll see you later."


"Later..." Chanyeol said as the other turned back around to return to his previous location.








Chanyeol didn't really take the whole hanging out thing very seriously so he was a little surprised when Baekhyun actually showed up at his door late in the afternoon.


"Oh, I forgot you were coming. It's kind of a mess." Chanyeol explained when he let Baekhyun inside, only because it sounded slightly better than saying he didn't think the other was serious about hanging out.


"I don't care." he said with a smile in response before looking around. "Do you have anything to drink?" Baekhyun asked, letting himself into the kitchen.


Chanyeol tried to remember what was in the fridge while Baekhyun was already making his way there. "I think there's some soda maybe."


"I mean something to drink." Baekhyun asked again, implying he meant something more along the lines of alcohol.


"Oh... there's a case of beer." He replied and Baekhyun's expression got a little happier. He opened the door and pulled two bottles out, handing one to Chanyeol before going to the living. Chanyeol was apparently drinking too.


"What are you watching?" Baekhyun asked as Chanyeol followed him into the living room.


"I don't know." he realized when he tried to remember. "I think I fell asleep for a little bit before you knocked." Baekhyun picked a seat on the far side of the couch so Chanyeol sat down on the opposite end.


"I haven't had a TV in so long I don't even know what's on anymore." Baekhyun explained while

Chanyeol flipped through channels trying to find anything that looked interesting. He eventually settled on some crime show drama which wouldn't have been his first pick, but there wasn't much to choose from on a Monday afternoon. It at least helped fill in what would have been awkward silences. Each beer made conversation easier, but also took away a little bit more of their brain to mouth filter.


"You're always so grumpy." Baekhyun said pretty randomly.


"No I'm not." Chanyeol argued reflexively, even though the statement was pretty true.


"Yeah, you kind of are." he argued back. "The first couple times I saw you I thought you really didn't like me, but now I realize that's just the way you are all the time."


"I guess maybe..." Chanyeol admitted. "And I didn't dislike you, I just... didn't know what to think about you."


"What does that mean?" Baekhyun asked a little defensively.


"I don't know. I've never known anyone that... has sex for money. I don't even know how you do that. Like that one guy that was at your apartment. He was so... I just wouldn't be able to I guess is what

I mean." Chanyeol tried to explain, but felt like he wasn't doing a very good job.



"They aren't all like that guy..." Baekhyun told him. "Besides, I never said I loved doing it. Sometimes I'll just pretend it's someone else. It's easy money though and it's hard to get a real job when you didn't finish high school and have no employment history or a permanent address so I just gave up on that a long time ago."


"You have an address." Chanyeol pointed out.


"Now I do, but I didn't used to." Baekhyun explained. "...and who knows for how long still..." he mumbled after.


"...Sorry." Chanyeol said, suddenly realizing that he was getting kind of personal and it wasn't any of his business. Maybe he shouldn't be drinking.


"It's fine..." Baekhyun told him before changing the subject to something a little less depressing. The mood gradually lightened back up and Baekhyun started asking Chanyeol questions about his hobbies and where he was from, staying away from anything too personal for now.


"I should go..." Baekhyun eventually said after counting the empty bottles on the coffee table. "Thanks for letting me hang out here. I think I needed a break from my life for a bit." he said as he got up from the couch a little unsteadily to let himself out.


Chanyeol started to get up and follow him to the door, but changed his mind at the last second, feeling like it might be weird. "Alright, later." He said instead. He probably needed the break from his life too he thought to himself after Baekhyun had left. He couldn't remember the last time he actually enjoyed spending time with someone, but then again maybe he just drank too much.








He started to see Baekhyun more often after that, although mostly he would just come into the store while he was working and buy seemingly unnecessary things, but he would come over to his apartment to watch TV sometimes too and Chanyeol figured it was more for the entertainment than actually spending time with him.


"It turned out I did need that money for rent." the shorter said while they were watching an overly boring movie one night.


"Told you." Chanyeol said without even looking away from the screen. He was sitting on the floor so Baekhyun could have the couch to himself to lay down. "It seems like that stalker guy would be more than willing to help you make rent." he added as a joke and laughed a little to himself, but when he looked over at Baekhyun, he didn't look amused. "I was just joking..."


"I know." Baekhyun's smile was a bit forced.








A few nights later Baekhyun was roaming around one of his usual spots a few blocks from his apartment and was actually a little happy to smell the distinctive smoke from a certain brand of cheap cigarettes as he made his way down the side street behind a bar. He didn't have to look very long to find who he was looking for. The guy would usually follow him around for a little while every other night or so, but Baekhyun would always ignore him and he'd eventually get bored and leave. Tonight, though, Baekhyun was the one to approach him for a change. There wasn't anyone else nearby, even the main street was pretty deserted this time of night.


"Okay, you can do whatever you want, but you're paying extra." Baekhyun told him as soon as he walked up.


The older man looked like he was thinking it over while he took another drag from his cigarette. "How much?"


"...Three hundred." Baekhyun told him, worrying that maybe he had gone too high. He really didn't want to give in to lowering the price, but he also couldn't afford to leave empty handed.


The guy didn't respond immediately and just continued to smoke his cigarette, walking towards the smaller until he was backed against the building from unconsciously stepping away from the man's advances. "Alright, deal." he finally said with a grin that kind of made Baekhyun feel a little sick.


"Do you have somewhere we can go?" Baekhyun asked.


The man just laughed and Baekhyun didn't get what was funny. The other pulled out his wallet and fished a few large bills out, handing them to Baekhyun. "No, I'm going to fuck you right here in the street where you belong."


Baekhyun fought the urge to roll his eyes and looked down toward the main street again, still not seeing anyone, before taking the money and sticking it into his pocket. "Alright." he agreed. He had already told he could have whatever he wanted so it was too late to argue now. He just hoped it would be quick. At least he knew what he was agreeing to this time so it wouldn't be anything surprising. Unfortunately though, the guy was not very happy about being ignored all the time and decided this was a good time to get some revenge, starting by pressing the still burning end of his cigarette into Baekhyun's shoulder. The shorter instinctively tried to pull away, but the wall behind him was in the way and all he could do was groan out in pain.


"Get rid of those pants." the guy demanded as he unbuttoned his own. Baekhyun did what he was told, but he'd barely gotten them undone when he was being turned around and pressed against the brick wall behind him with his jeans bunched around his thighs. He knew what was coming next, but it didn't make it any less unpleasant. The guy never uses lube, Baekhyun learned the last time, and the small amount on the condom wasn't helping much, especially with his immediate forceful thrusting. Baekhyun just bit his lip and tried to focus on something else, reminding himself that he really needs the money.


A couple minutes later Baekhyun felt a pair of hands tighten around his neck, but he wasn't as startled as he should have been. He'd been expecting it and was actually relieved to know it was almost over. The other guy definitely had a tighter grip around his throat this time though and he was inadvertently pushing the side of Baekhyun's face roughly against the brick wall, or maybe he was doing it on purpose. He was starting to feel a little light-headed from lack of air when the other man finally came, although he didn't let go of him for a few more seconds. As soon as he did, Baekhyun reflexively gasped for air, coughing a bit as well. He stayed there unmoving, trying to get air back into his lungs, while the man zipped his pants back up and quickly left without a word. Once he was gone, Baekhyun pulled his pants back up and turned around to lean his back to the wall while he tried to straighten his appearance. He started to feel a slight stinging on his face and reached up to where it was. The skin on his cheek felt wet and he found blood on his fingers when he pulled them back. "Mother fucker..." he mumbled to himself before starting to head back to his apartment to take a shower, or maybe two.








Baekhyun had kind of been avoiding Chanyeol for a few days, but not entirely on purpose. It just ended up that way since he hadn't really left his apartment much. When the other eventually came knocking on his door he wasn't really surprised.


"Hey, you haven't been at the-" Chanyeol stopped mid-sentence when he noticed the scrapes and fading bruise on the side of the shorter's face. "What the fuck happened?"


Baekhyun's automatic reaction was to look away to hide his injury, even though it was too late for that. "Nothing. I'm fine." he immediately answered. Chanyeol apparently didn't want to talk in the hall anymore because he pushed the door open and walked past Baekhyun, letting himself in. "Hey, maybe I don't want you in here." the shorter told him, but Chanyeol only closed the door behind him instead of leaving. This was actually the first time he had ever been inside Baekhyun's apartment, but he was too preoccupied to do much looking around.


"I'll leave... after you tell me what happened." he told him and waited, starting to notice more faint bruises around his neck now.


Baekhyun knew he wouldn't be able to physically force him out himself so after a few seconds he sighed in defeat and annoyance. "I needed money so I went to that guy..." he explained.



It took a few seconds for Chanyeol to figure out who he was talking about. "He hit you?" he

asked, trying not to sound as angry as he felt.


"No! He just..." Baekhyun answered like it was a ridiculous assumption, but trailed off before he went any further because the truth didn't sound any better. "It doesn't even matter, I agreed to it. Better me than someone that doesn't deserve it anyway." he said without thinking and immediately regretted it.


"What are you talking about? You don't deserve it." Chanyeol was starting to lose his temper, but it wasn't Baekhyun he was mad at, it was himself. He was the one that gave him the idea to do it, even if it was a joke it was still because of him.


"You said you'd leave after I told you." Baekhyun pointed out and reopened the door, ignoring what the other said. Chanyeol continued to stand there for a few more seconds before keeping his part of the deal and reluctantly leaving.


Being alone in his own apartment wasn't helping Chanyeol's state of mind at all though and after thirty minutes of restlessness he grabbed his jacket and left. He started walking, not really knowing where he was going, but he knew who he was looking for. He cut through every side street he could find that was anywhere near where Baekhyun usually was and after twenty minutes of searching he finally found the guy, smoking outside the back door of a bar. When he saw Chanyeol walking towards him he looked like he might just remember him, but before he could say anything Chanyeol's fist was hitting the side of his jaw.


He only meant to say a few choice words and maybe threaten him, but as soon as he saw the other's smug grin his body acted on its own and it wouldn't stop. He just kept hitting him and the guy seemed too drunk to properly fight back, missing every swing he attempted and quickly losing his balance, falling down onto the pavement. Chanyeol continued to mindlessly throw punches until he saw blood on his hand and he wasn't sure which of theirs it was. He finally stopped and pulled up on the guy's shirt, forcing him to somewhat sit up. "If you ever touch Baekhyun again... next time I'm not going to stop." he told him before pushing him back down onto the ground and quickly leaving.


The realization of what he did gradually started to sink in as Chanyeol walked back to his apartment. He was pretty sure the guy recognized him and if he could easily call the police and tell them exactly where he lived. The more he thought about it, the faster he walked. He was so worried about the possible consequences of his actions that he didn't even stop to think about why he did it in the first place.








The next few days had Chanyeol on edge, heart racing at the sight of any cops or the sound of sirens and, as irrational as he realized he was being, he couldn't help it. When it got to the end of the week and he seemingly still hadn't been turned in he started to think maybe the guy was too drunk to remember him, or remember exactly who he was at least. Either way, Chanyeol was feeling more than relieved and felt even better when he saw Baekhyun outside walking toward the store.


"Hey." Baekhyun said as he walked in. "Do you get off soon?" he asked, going straight to Chanyeol's spot at the counter instead of his usual odd shopping.


Chanyeol looked at the clock briefly. "In like fifteen minutes."


"I'll wait for you out back." the shorter said before walking back outside.


The next shift was running late so it was more like twenty five minutes later when Chanyeol exited the backdoor of the store, hauling a large bag of trash with him, but the other was still waiting. "What's up?" he asked as he threw the bag into the dumpster. Baekhyun had been walking behind him from the door to the dumpster, but hadn't said anything yet.


"I don't know what you thought you were going to accomplish by beating on that guy, but I don't need your protection or... whatever it is you think you're doing, I don't know. I told you that I let him do it, what part of that do you not understand?" Baekhyun said angrily.


Chanyeol wasn't expecting to have an argument when he came outside and just stood there looking surprised for a few seconds. He honestly didn't think Baekhyun would find out about it. "Yeah, but-"


"Just stay out of my business, okay?" Baekhyun interrupted before he could say anything else. "It was a bad idea to be friends." He added before walking back toward the street. Those words were more painful than Chanyeol expected.








Baekhyun made it pretty obvious that he was done with their friendship, practically ignoring

Chanyeol's existence whenever they happened to pass by each other in the hall. Chanyeol kind of felt like he deserved it and just accepted the other's decision and didn't bother trying to change it. Another friendship he failed at, nothing new. It was easier for him to think of it that way instead of acknowledging the fact that he really missed the other.


Baekhyun did have a right to be angry at him, but unfortunately that wasn't really his reason for ending the friendship. He knew he was starting to like Chanyeol, more than just a friend, and he was doing his best to ignore it, but now he was starting to think Chanyeol might have similar feelings and he needed to stop things before they started. Chanyeol's actions just gave him a good excuse. There were still a few times he saw the taller outside their apartments and he wanted to say something, just start talking again like nothing happened, but he never actually did and they just passed like strangers. It was probably for the best, he wasn't willing to let himself get attached to anyone again.




It didn't take long for people to hear about Chanyeol attacking that guy and Baekhyun was starting to notice a steady decline in business. No one seemed to want to take the risk on him. He was still able to get a few people that were from other parts of town, but it wasn't nearly enough to keep up with rent. After a couple months of hardly any income, he came home one night to find a final eviction notice taped to his door and the locks changed. He leaned his forehead against the door in frustration while he tried to figure out what he was going to do. This had been his first apartment and it took him a long time to save up the money and then actually find somewhere willing to give him a lease. Now he was back at square one.


After a few minutes he looked to the door next to his and reluctantly moved a few steps over and knocked on it. He waited a couple minutes, but he didn't hear any movement from inside so he knocked again a little louder. He wasn't even sure if Chanyeol was home, but he didn't really have anywhere else to go right now. Another minute passed before the door finally opened and it was obvious he had woken the other up.


"Sorry, I know it's late." he apologized, feeling a bit of déjà vu. "Is it okay if I sleep on your couch tonight?"


Chanyeol only stared back at first, wondering why they were on speaking terms again all of a sudden. "What's wrong with your place?" he eventually asked.


"I... don't have one anymore." he explained. "They changed the locks."


"Sure." Chanyeol answered without asking anymore questions. Now that he knew Baekhyun was really only here out of necessity he figured his original request to stay out of his business still stood. He gave him an extra pillow from his bed along with a spare blanket before moving back to his own room.


"Thanks." Baekhyun said, but he wasn't even sure if Chanyeol heard him since he was already halfway down the hall by then. The shorter got rid of some of his clothes and got as comfortable as he could under the slightly scratchy blanket, eventually falling asleep.


When Chanyeol woke up the next morning he found Baekhyun still asleep in the living room in his underwear, face down on top of the blanket he had given him, with one leg on and one leg off of the couch. It didn't look very comfortable, but Baekhyun was still quietly so Chanyeol didn't bother him and went to the kitchen for a drink while trying to erase the image of Baekhyun half-naked on his couch from his memory. Now that he was fully awake and thinking back to the night before, he wished he had maybe been a little nicer to the other when he showed up since he obviously wasn't having the best week. Maybe Baekhyun wasn't mad at him anymore. Chanyeol must have made more noise getting his drink than he thought because after a few minutes he could hear fabric rustling in the other room. When he went to check, Baekhyun was already dressed and trying to pull his socks on.


"I wasn't going to kick you out or anything. You can st-."


"I have to go." Baekhyun interrupted before Chanyeol could finish.


"Why'd you come here last night, what happened?" Chanyeol asked not caring if it was okay to or not anymore.


"Nothing." Baekhyun said, falling back down to sit on the couch. He should be angry since it was kind of Chanyeol's fault he was currently homeless, but he just couldn't seem to be mad at him. "I just can't work here anymore. I need to go somewhere else." he quickly got back up and walked towards the front door.


"So you're leaving then?" Chanyeol asked, following behind him and trying not to sound as disappointed as he felt. "Like, forever?"


Baekhyun stopped at the door for his shoes. "Yeah, probably." he answered while he tied one shoe, quickly switching to the other.


"Wait." Chanyeol said as Baekhyun stood back up, reaching for the door. Chanyeol didn't know why he asked him to wait because he wasn't coming up with anything else to say, but he just didn't want him to leave. He'd had a lot of time since they stopped being friends to think about how he really felt and now he thought he should say something because maybe it would be his only chance. When he didn't say anything immediately though, Baekhyun started to open the door.


Chanyeol quickly pushed it back shut without thinking, getting an annoyed look from the shorter. "Look, I'm not any good at saying how I feel..." he started, but even now he didn't know how to express what he wanted with words.


Baekhyun was still stood with his hand on the door knob, now staring off to the corner to avoid having to look at Chanyeol. Really he just wanted Chanyeol to stop talking because nothing good would come out of it. He got his wish in a way because the other did stop talking, but only to lean in and press his lips against Baekhyun's instead. There was a very brief moment where Baekhyun was returning the kiss before he was pushing Chanyeol away from him.


"No... I'm leaving." was all he said as he opened the door enough to slip out of the apartment leaving Chanyeol with painful words again.






Baekhyun had a tendency to mean what he said and he really didn't come back. Chanyeol didn't see him for months, maybe even a year; he wasn't very good at keeping up with the time. It would have stayed that way too most likely if he hadn't decided to go out with some old friends from school one night. He didn't really want to go, but he also didn't want to hear the endless complaining if he told them no so

he eventually agreed if someone gave him a ride.


This was the first time he had really seen any of them since graduation and it had apparently already been decided that they would go bar hopping downtown. They almost all ended up drinking a lot more than Chanyeol expected, with the exception of the one driving them, although he didn't think he was nearly as drunk as the others. It wasn't until after two or three in the morning that they all agreed it was time to head home.


It was on the drive back that the drunker ones saw some guy on the side of the road and decided it would be fun to stop and harass him. Chanyeol was in the backseat not really paying attention to what anyone was saying until the car was slowing down and pulling over. He was about to ask what was going on when he saw someone approaching and recognized him immediately. Even with the new dark brown hair color, or new to Chanyeol at least. He slouched down in his seat while trying to casually cover his face with his hand, hoping he would go unnoticed. He had always kept some hope of seeing Baekhyun again, but not like this.


"Hey!" came a drunk sounding voice shouting louder than necessary from the front seat. Chanyeol couldn't help trying to peak through his fingers to see what was happening. Baekhyun was leaning with his arms crossed against the front passenger side door looking at the drunk guy in front of him with an annoyed look. "How much... for you to blow all of us?" he eventually got out, although very slurred. Chanyeol almost verbally objected, but stopped himself before anything could get out of his mouth, not wanting to give away his presence in the car full of idiots. Baekhyun actually looked like he was considering the request, looking around at the rest of the people in the car. When the other's gaze lingered in his direction for a little too long Chanyeol realized he was screwed.


"...Chanyeol?"


The taller let his hand fall from his face since it obviously wasn't hiding him very well while everyone else in the car was turning to look at him. "You know this guy?" One of them asked with some combination of surprise and confusion. Chanyeol didn't answer right away, but eventually mumbled something about being friends. That only seemed to encourage the drunk one's inappropriateness. "Did you fuck him?" he asked quite bluntly. The guy was always an asshole to be fair, but he was really outdoing himself tonight.


Chanyeol was about to lose his temper, but then he saw Baekhyun walking away and quickly opened his door to get out of the car. He ended up tripping over his own feet in the process, but caught himself before his face could hit the pavement at least and hastily got back up. He closed the car door behind him and started walking after the other.


"Baekhyun, wait!" he called after him while he could hear insults coming from the car behind him. He wasn't sure if they were directed at him or Baekhyun or both, but either way he promptly turned around to give them an appropriate hand gesture. They didn't seem to care much for it because they immediately drove off, leaving Chanyeol to find his own way home. "...fuck." he mumbled to himself, realizing he didn't even know where he was. He didn't dwell on it for long though and started walking after Baekhyun again, although he had to jog a bit to catch up.


"Nice friends." Baekhyun said disdainfully when he realized Chanyeol was behind him again and started to walk faster.


"They aren't really my friends." he replied, easily keeping up with Baekhyun's faster pace, thanks to his height advantage. "I just went to school with them."


"Why are you following me?" the shorter snapped at him when he couldn't come up with anything else to say.


"I... don't know." Chanyeol answered. He just kind of did it without thinking. "I didn't think I would see you again after you left that day and I just... I just want to talk to you. Are you still angry about what I did? Because I'm sorry. I realize I never said I was sorry and I really am. I was just worried about you."


Baekhyun couldn't help the short laugh that came out of his mouth at that last part. He was never really all that angry about it to begin with, even though that was what he told Chanyeol at the time. "I'm not still angry." he at least answered before turning down another street, only throwing Chanyeol off course for a few seconds before he was right beside him again.


"I don't understand then. Why are you still like this? What else did I do wrong?" Chanyeol asked, although it was more of a question for himself as he was mostly thinking out loud now.


Baekhyun unconsciously slowed down at the question before answering truthfully. "You kissed me." he said.


Chanyeol still didn't understand. "You kissed me back." he pointed out, but Baekhyun only started to walk up to a dingy looking apartment building. Chanyeol followed, waiting for a response that
Baekhyun didn't seem to be willing to give him.


Instead, the shorter just stopped when he got to the door of the building and turned toward him. "Do you need money for a cab or something?"


"No." Chanyeol said immediately because he wasn't leaving. "Baekhyun... I like you... a lot. Do you really not feel at all the same? Just even a little?" he asked feeling really frustrated.


"You don't like me." was all he said with a sigh instead of answering, somehow trying to convince the both of them. "You like the idea of me you have in your head. You think if we were together then I could stop selling blow jobs and fucks or I don't know. You think everything would magically be better if we were together..." even he sounded a little disappointed saying it. "In reality, I'll just end up dragging you down and ruin whatever is good in your life instead." the shorter said and let himself inside the building.



It would be a lie if Chanyeol said he had never thought of those things, but he also knew it wasn't


very realistic. "That's not what I think." he argued after a few seconds. "And you are what's good in my life... or was good." he said as he continued to follow the shorter up the stairs inside.


Baekhyun seemed to be ignoring him now as he kept climbing stairs until they reached the fourth floor. He sighed in front of his own door at the fact the Chanyeol was still there. "Please, just go home." he finally said.


"I'll leave, if you tell me that you don't have any feelings for me." Chanyeol told him.


Baekhyun started to look in his pocket for his keys. "I don-"


"Look at me and tell me." Chanyeol quickly added.


Then, there was hesitation. Baekhyun stared at the key in his hand for a few seconds before eventually looking over to where the taller was standing next to him. "I don't ha-"


Chanyeol cut him off again, but this time by kissing him before he could finish the sentence. Whatever he was going to say didn't sound like it was what Chanyeol wanted to hear. He was surprised at the lack of resistance, but the other was probably just too tired to stop him. A few seconds later he pulled away with one last attempt to change Baekhyun's mind. "Okay wait... before you say it, I just want to tell you that I've really missed you and I don't think I just like you... I think maybe I-"


"Don't." Baekhyun interrupted, looking back down at the key in his hand. "You can't just say things like that." he mumbled to himself as he tried to unlock his door.


"Like what?" Chanyeol quickly asked. "I know you might not feel the same, but you wouldn't have kissed me back just now if there wasn't at least something."


Baekhyun finally opened his door to let himself in. only stepping just inside before turning back around to the hall. "Do you... want to come in?" he asked and Chanyeol only looked at him like it might be some sort of trick. "Just to talk." Baekhyun added.


"Okay." Chanyeol replied although he still wasn't sure if Baekhyun was just being nice or maybe he was actually changing his mind. He slowly walked into the apartment and shut the door behind him. The shorter was just staring at him and looking like he was trying to solve some great mystery. "So..."

Chanyeol tried to start some sort of conversation because this was feeling a little awkward now, but Baekhyun interrupted him.


"Let's just have sex." Baekhyun said quickly, like it was no big deal.


"...Um what?" Chanyeol asked, confused. That was a pretty big jump from Baekhyun's previous request to 'just go home'.


"If we have sex, then the intrigue will be gone. You'll realize you didn't like me as much as you thought." Baekhyun continued to talk like this was all logical and made perfect sense.


"I... don't want to." Chanyeol replied, still shocked at the proposition.


"Why not?" he asked, sounding a little offended.


"I mean I do, but not like that." Chanyeol explained. "I kind of wanted it to be spontaneous, like in the heat of the moment, you know?"


Baekhyun's blank expression changed as he started to laugh at the taller. "You're so lame." he eventually said, still laughing slightly. Chanyeol didn't find it nearly as funny though and thought maybe he should just go home as he turned back to the door.


"No, wait. I'm sorry. I mean you are kind of lame, but it's cute. I like it." It wasn't the best apology, but it was enough to keep Chanyeol from leaving at least. "Okay, maybe I kind of like you." Baekhyun finally admitted and Chanyeol turned back around with a flicker of hope in his face. "Not that it makes any difference because I don't want to be in a relationship."


"Why not?" Chanyeol asked.


"Because... I just don't." Baekhyun replied, not willing to give his reasons. "Besides I don't want you beating up everyone I have sex with because you're jealous or something."


"I wasn't jealous!" Chanyeol sighed. "He hurt you."


"Well, that's what some people want to pay for. Whatever the reason, you can't do stuff like that..." Baekhyun told him. "That was why I had to leave, you know."


"I'm sorry." Chanyeol apologized again, not really realizing until now that he was the cause of

Baekhyun's problems


The shorter mentally debated what he should do now for a few seconds before he spoke again. "It's late. You're going to have a hard time getting a ride home now so... you can stay here if you want."



"Stay... here?" Chanyeol repeated, sounding unsure.


"I know it's a dump but you can have my bed, I'll sleep on the floor" Baekhyun offered.


"No, I'll sleep on the floor. You didn't exactly want me here in the first place so I'm not going to take your bed." Chanyeol told him, glancing across the small one room apartment for the first time since he'd walked in. Then his eyes went back to Baekhyun. "So... you do like me?" he asked just to double check what he had heard a minute ago.


"We're just friends." Baekhyun emphasized.


Chanyeol was a little disappointed at that, but at least they were friends again. "I'm just going to go clean myself up." he said before heading to the bathroom. He was starting to notice that he still smelled like alcohol and smoke from the bar and it was making him a little sick. He washed his face in the sink and then looked down at his clothes unapprovingly. He removed all of them except his underwear at first, but felt a little weird about wearing so little and quickly put his undershirt back on. After few minutes he went back out to the other room to find Baekhyun wearing only a pair of boxer-briefs and pulling a few blankets and a pillow off of his bed to make Chanyeol a place to sleep on the floor. Baekhyun obviously wasn't having the same concerns about revealing sleepwear, not that he minded, but it was a little distracting.


Chanyeol quickly took the blankets from the other before he could do anything with them. "I'll do it." he offered, not wanting to be any more of a burden and needing something else to do besides stare at Baekhyun's ass. "Thank you though." he quickly added, hoping he didn't sound as rude as he thought.


"No problem." Baekhyun replied and settled himself into the pile of blankets still remaining on his bed. It seemed like more than one person should need to sleep, but he wasn't about to start a conversation about what's an appropriate amount of blankets to have. Instead he just got as comfortable as he could and tried his best to go to sleep.


After a few minutes of silence and darkness he started to think about what Baekhyun said earlier about him being jealous and now he wondered if there was reason to be. "Are you still awake?" he eventually asked quietly in Baekhyun's general direction.


"...Yeah." came an answer after a few seconds.


"Can I ask you a personal question?" Chanyeol asked, sounding unsure.


There was a longer pause this time before Baekhyun answered. "Okay."


Chanyeol wasn't sure what kind of response that was, but he continued anyway. "Do you ever...

um get off?" there was only silence and he realized he didn't word that very well. "I mean when you...
when you're..." Sometimes Chanyeol really hated how bad he was at speaking.



"Not usually." came a surprisingly quick response. Baekhyun apparently understood what he was trying to ask.


"So sometimes you do?" Chanyeol continued to ask, while Baekhyun was starting to get a little embarrassed by the topic of conversation, surprisingly.


"Why are you asking this?" he questioned back instead of answering that one.


"I don't know... I'm just curious." Chanyeol replied. He wasn't exactly telling the truth, but he wasn't about to admit that he might be just a little jealous, maybe. "You're avoiding my question."


"Okay yeah, sometimes." Baekhyun admitted.


"Why sometimes?"


Chanyeol couldn't see it, but Baekhyun's face was becoming redder by the second. "I told you before, sometimes I just pretend it's someone else and I guess under the right conditions it works a little too well." he answered quickly hoping that would be the end of the conversation. There was a long silence and he thought he was going to get his wish, but no.


"...Who do you think about?" Chanyeol eventually asked.


"Go to sleep." Baekhyun told him and Chanyeol could hear him moving to face the other direction.


"Why don't you want to answer?" Chanyeol continued, ignoring Baekhyun's statement. "Is it someone embarrassing? Do I know them?" Still no response. "Is it that g-"


"It was you, okay? Goodnight." Baekhyun said in the middle of the other's sentence.


"What?" Chanyeol asked, not sure if he heard right since he was talking over him at the time.


"I'm not saying it again." Baekhyun said firmly. "Goodnight."


Chanyeol didn't know how to respond to that, but apparently he wasn't expected to.

"...Goodnight." he said to show he wasn't going to ask anymore, but it was a little while before he was able to fall asleep after that.








When he woke up again he wasn't sure how long he had been asleep for because there was no clock and he left his phone in the pocket of his jeans, still in the bathroom. What he was sure of was that he was very cold. He pulled his blanket around him tighter and curled himself up to try and get warmer, but it wasn't making much of a difference. After a lot of internal debate he decided to wake Baekhyun up. "Hey... Baekhyun?" he tried to speak loud enough to be heard, but not loud enough to be startling. He got no response though, not even a change in breathing. Now he was understanding all the blankets the other was covered in. This time he reached over to shake his shoulder lightly. "Baekhyun, wake up." This time he got a groan and an arm swatting aimlessly in his general direction. "Is your heat on?" he asked hoping the other was at least awake enough to understand what he was saying.


"It doesn't work very well..." came the mumbled response. "Take some more blankets." Baekhyun said pulling at the one on top and trying to give it to Chanyeol rather unsuccessfully. Chanyeol was able to reach it without help anyway and pulled the thicker blanket over the one he had already. He started to feel warmer right away and quickly fell back to sleep.