I get to school with about 10 minutes before my first class so I go to my locker and put my skateboard and headphones in it, I take my air pods out my bag and connect them to my phone I play "baby don't cut (acoustic)" I find so much comfort in that song and I don't know why, I press play and just do laps around the school until the bell goes for period 1, a couple teachers pass and say hi and smile at me.
the bell goes, I check my timetable and see I have chemistry, I remembered that we have a new teacher this year, I really hope she isn't some moany/strict teacher, im walking towards the class and a familiar person steps out the room... oh my god
the woman who nearly hit me this morning.. WHAT?
I play it cool and just say hi and good morning and she just smiles, I don't think she remembers it was me, thank GOD.
I go to sit up the back as I usually do in all my classes as I like to be isolated away from everyone and I don't have any friends as im seen as the 'weird, ugly girl' and everyone hates me!! she comes around handing out paper and im zoned out and don't notice her coming towards me with work. she neels down beside me
"are you okay" I jump as I hear her whisper and I didn't even know she was there
"huh, oh yeah sorry im okay thank you, are you' I look at her confused as of why she asked me if im okay.
"im okay thank you, stay behind after class" she doesn't give me a chance to respond and walks off.
I hear a boy across from me
"god shes so hot I could fuck her"
I roll my eyes and turn up my music again, zoning out ignoring everything around me.
after class im packing up and remember the teacher asked me to stay behind, everyone leaves apart from me, I don't even know her name because I didn't listen to a thing that whole period I just sat listening to my music.
I hear her call my name
"tess" I hear her, her voice is so soothing.
"yea miss" I respond
"are you sure you're okay" she looks at me, I tear up but I blink them away before she notices. I feel like I could tell her everything.
if I said I was okay I would be lying, but if I said no I would need to open up to her and I don't feel like doing that. I hesitate for a moment but all I do is shrug my shoulders which makes her give me a look.
"sit" she tells me, I know shes not asking me shes telling me to
I don't want a lecture so I just walk out. I hear her shouting my name and telling me to come back but I don't listen and keep walking.
the popular mean girl walks by me and whispers something
"what was that?" I say in an annoyed tone
"slut" she says looking me in the eye
"wow, considering I'm a virgin and you've slept with half the school" I tell her and I hear laughing and people surrounding us, great, I just push by her hitting her shoulder and she grunts. I head straight to the school toilets and I look to see if anyone is in the furthest away stall and there's not. Good, I step inside the cubical and close the lid of the toilet and sit.
I take my case off my phone, revealing two blades, I look at them for a second thinking to myself if its really worth hurting myself over something stupid. my thoughts are taking over
"just do it"
"go deeper"
"no one will care"
I pick up the blade and drag it across my skin leaving trails of blood on my wrists.
"go deeper" my thoughts are coming over me, I press the blade deeper realising that ive got a bit too deep.
I take a bit of paper towel and wipe my wrists, "shit" I whisper as I realise the blood just keeps coming, I have 15 minutes before my next class to stop this bleeding, what am I going to do.
the bell rings for my next class but I start to feel faint because of the amount of blood ive lost, "shit, shit, shit" I start panicking, "no, no, no"
I'm dogging my next class, I don't care I can't go. "I think its time I get help" I think to myself and I pull my sleeves down and step out the cubical thinking of who I can go to who can I trust? no one, I don't have anyone, I see my chemistry teacher walking the halls and she smiles at me
"why aren't you in class" she stops me
"why aren't you" god I'm so stupid shes literally a teacher, its probably her period off.
"I'm off this period, tell me why aren't you in class the bell rang 10 minutes ago"
"uhm I'm just going there the now" I lied straight to her face, I'm so stupid I need help she could help me, I just don't want anyone to worry about me, and shes a teacher she will need to call my dad and he cannot know, plus he wouldn't even care.
"you're lying come with me" she looks at me seriously.
shit.
YOU ARE READING
darkest secrets (wlw) (teacherxstudent)
Non-Fictiona story about a 18 almost 19 year old girl who suffers with really bad mental health and shes about to go into senior year with about 10 months till graduation she gets a new chemistry teacher for a substitute teacher because her chem teacher for ju...