To be thirteen

New friend,or a traumatizing experience

About the age of 8, on a cold winter day of July . I met someone I can not forget.
I was sitting alone freezing when I saw a hand stretch out and the young girl saying ,"Hi, I'm Layla."
Elena,"hi we in the same class right ?"
Layla,"Um I think so ,I'm not exactly sure since we've never spoken to each other before. "
Elena,"ah I see."

With such a brief introduction you wouldn't believe that this gurl was the closest person to me for at least 5years of my life after this . And just like that I made a new friend ,in a new school ,that didn't live far from my new neighborhood.
Today that I look back at the moments we spent together I think I only thought I related to Layla was because she had problems with her dad and he made her feel uncomfortable.Im not exactly sure what she hated her dad so much for but I wish I had asked back then .

Typical children get yelled at by their parents for doing things they weren't supposed to,but after meeting Layla it was a different kind of story.

Layla:"Do u ever think you adopted?"
Elena:" No why?"
Layla:" I don't think my dad loves me he's always shouting at me for no reason"
Elena:"Really,I'm sorry"
Layla:"yeah"
Elena:"I guess I too am adopted "
Layla:"What but I thought you sai..'
Elena:" I did say that but it also feels like my mom hates me ,she always shouts at me as if my emotions don't matter at all, she looks at me with disgust and makes me scared, that's why I also think I'm adopted "
Layla:"I'm sorry to hear that,but I was thinking of running away wouldn't you like to do it with me
Elena :" really I would love to run away from this hell let's do it soon so we don't have to tolerate our parents hatred"

Not only has this conversation been in my mind for years and will be for years to come,I'm surprised how she got me to believe that I was adopted just because I got yelled at a few times . After this incident when ever my mom would shout or yell at me I would run to the bathroom and begin to cry on the bathroom telling myself I was not loved and appreciated and with a face full of remorse I would whisper to the heavens one day I was going to leave with no goodbye and make them suffer for crying alone on the bathroom floors .

I don't blame Layla for encouraging me to run away sometimes I wish I actually did it ,but would it make a difference?
Would they have even felt the tinniest bit of pain if I disappeared?
Those were the questions that ran through my young mind .

If what I've already mentioned has not given you an insight of what point I'm trying to make let me tell you about when I was ten .

                         2years later .