'Innocent Oldest' (Malcolm In The Middle Fanfic)

S1E1: Pilot

Third Person's POV

"This is the world 196 million square miles.If I covered 100 square miles

an hour every hour for the rest of my lifeI'd still only see half of it."

The camera pans to a twitching nose

"This is the left nostril of my brother Reese.It squeaks all night long."

Then it pans to feet

"These are the freezing cold feet of my little brother... Dewey."

Then a picture of a boy

"This is my older brother Francis.He's the one I really like so, of course, he got sent to military school."

Then the camera pans to another boy who was in the kitchen making toaster waffles. "This is my oldest brother Jeremy, cooking, he's moms favourite."

"My name is Malcolm.You want to know what the best thing about childhood is?At some point, it stops."

Yes, no, maybe

I don't know

Can you repeat the question?

You're not the boss of me now and you're not so big

You're not the boss of me now

You're not the boss of me now

You're not the boss of me now and you're not so big

Life is unfair

...

"Malcolm,Reese, Dewey get in here!!" Malcolm's mother 'Lois' shouted as she shaved the hair off of her husband's 'Hal' back while singing along to music. The boys rushed down stairs with Malcolm and Reese fighting.

"No, stop!"

"I'm not touching..."

"Your brother made toaster waffles, there's only two.One of you has to have cereal."

As soon as those words came out of her mouth the boys rushed to the fridge while Jeremy watched them with an amused look on his face.

"It's mine!"

"Come on!"

"Give it!"

"You cheated!"

"Give it! Give it!"

...

As a mother and her two girls were walking on the pavement, they got a little spooked when they heard shouting making them speed up and bow their heads. Malcolm and Reese were fighting....again

"Go on, just go. No, wait, wait, wait. Okay, okay, okay, I ran out of ham. One of you has to have egg salad, okay?" Lois told her three boys, while the oldest was waiting for his mother. "Here Jeremy take 30" Lois said "Thanks mom"

The camera pans to malcolm-

"Jeremy usually drops and picks us up from school but on Fridays he has some study group things all the way on the next side of town. He said that the school asked him to have the meetings at this time." Malcolm shrugged

The camera is in full view-

As the car pulled out of the driveway and went in the other direction the boys started walking.

Reese turned to Malcolm"It's your turn, to walk with him."

"I walked him yesterday, and the day before." Malcolm said in much displeasure