it's all in my head

The new chapter

This was it. My dream was finally a reality. I was officially a part of Arsenal. I had been in yesterday to sign my contract. Today, I was meeting all the players, my new teammates, I guess.

"Mama, my eye sore," my 16 month old daughter Kayla said, clinging to my leg. "I know my baby, you're tired. You can have a nap now, " I told her as I finished putting her buggy together. As soon as I put her in, her eyes instantly closed. I finished loading her nappy bag into the buggy and made my way into the building.

The first thing I noticed when I walked in was a blonde girl sitting in the corner. As soon as she saw me, she sprang up out of her seat. Hi, im  beth, " she told me, pulling me in for a hug. Hun I know who you are. You're literally half the populations idol. "Hi, I'm Elena." I smiled at her.

"Jonas said to bring you to meet everybody as he's in meetings all this afternoon," she told me as she pushed open the double doors, letting it close before I could get the buggy in. "Oh, I'm so sorry," she said as she saw me struggling to fit the buggy through the doors. "Who's this?" she asked, smiling at the buggy as she held the doors open. "This is kayla,"

As we turned a corner, I was met with a door saying  players' room. As soon as she pushed open the door, we were met with a bunch of girls crowded round the door, obviously all excited to meet the new signing. "Beth, you got her!" I heard a voice I recognised as Steph Catley said as she saw me enter.

"Girls, this is Elena, our new signing," Beth introduced me. "Hiya," I waved at the girls, putting the brake on Kaylas pram. As I went round individually and hugged each girl, I heard Kayla stir. Reaching over and laying her special blanket over her, she turned over and went back asleep.

"So kiddo," Lia Walti said, patting the spot next to her for me to sit, "tell is about yourself. I cleared my throat and began speaking. "My name is Elena Taylor, I'm 17. I have a 16 month old Kayla. Ermmm, I've lived all over the world growing up, but I'm originally from Liverpool. My dads English, mum's Irish. Got kicked out when I was 3 months pregnant with kayla. Was only 15  at the time. Em, there's not much else to say."

"Where did you go when you got kicked out?" Beth asked from across the room. "Beth, you can't say that," viv told her, sending me an apoplectic glance. "No, it's grand," I assured her. "I moved in with my auntie and sister in Australia for a while before my sister and I moved back to London."

All the girls nodded their head, listening to what I was saying.

"If you have any questions, ask me because I honestly don't mind," I said, looking around at all the girls.

"The father?" I heard from the back, I looked down to see Victoria Pelova had asked me. "He's not in the picture. He was 19 when I was pregnant, so he upped and left as soon as I told him I was pregnant. It doesn't bother me, tho" All of the girls offered sympathetic looks to me. That made me feel so awkward. As if she sensed there was awkward silence, kayla stirred in her buggy and stared crying.

I scooped her up in my arms and put her on my knee, trying to soothe her. "Sorry girls, her sleep schedules not been great since we came home from aus" I apologised to the girls as I could see them all staring at me. "No, no, don't apologise," Caitlin assured me.

After a few minutes of soothing, kayla fell back asleep. Just in time for lunch. As soon as I walked into the canteen with kayla in my arms, a wave of anxiety rolled through me.

Where do I sit?! What if the girls don't want me to sit with them?! Before my thoughts could get any further, I was cut off by the one voice I really did not want to hear today.....