You're Going to Die Alone

Chapter 1

It wasn't his best day. Blitz's mission was different from M&M's: to find his sister. He'd been lucky enough to find her, only for her to tell him she didn't want anything to do with him. 'Haven't you fucked my life up enough already?’ her words rang in his head.

The first thing that came to his mind was Barbie's expression when her supplier died. Her words felt like a punch in the gut, but her eyes were different. At that moment she looked just like their dad, his cold, angry eyes staring straight at him, telling him what a mistake he is, only this time it wasn’t his damn bag of shit of a dad, it was his sister.

His sister Barbie, the girl he had known his whole life, the girl he’d grown up with, staring at him like he was an abomination.

Many people, including those who used to be important to his life, have told him what an asshole he is. He fucked up with Fizzarolli, leaving him when he needed him. Even though he accidentally started the entire fire, it didn't change the fact that he ruined Fizz's life. Not just Fizz's, but Barbie's too. That damn fire took everything from him—his friend, his family, and the one thing that matters to him. He lost everything.

The thing Blitz hated the most was change. He still remembers how much he disliked his body becoming more and more sweaty, taller, and lanky. He hated changes in his life the most, not just in his physical appearance but also in his relationships with friends and family. He made mistakes with Barbie and Fizz, and he still makes mistakes with other people. He wanted to leave and pushed them away because he was afraid of letting anyone love him or get close to him. Even though his relationship with Verosika wasn't perfect, he still ruined it. He pushed her away because he was afraid of hurting her because she was getting too close to him. So just like everyone in his life he pushed her away.

Blitz pulled out his phone and looked at the old photo he had of Verosika. Blitz pulled out his phone and looked at the old photo he had of Verosika. In it, the two of them appear happy, but Blitz's expression betrays that he is exhausted, yet he forced a smile just for Verosika. It was arrogant of him to abandon her in the hotel by herself, without saying goodbye to her or giving an explanation on why he left her. Without saying anything further, he took her credit card and left her alone in the hotel. Verosika now is another person who once looked at him with adoration and affection but now looks at him with utter hatred.

He remembers hearing her album that year, the shitty things she said about him, and the damage he caused her. He broke pieces from her heart. She had a tattoo of his name on her arm, but now it had been crossed out. She moved on with her life, hated him for ever, and was done with him and his shit.

He swiped left, showing a recent picture he took at the nearby bar with Millie and Moxxie. The only people who can handle his crap are M&M. He is aware of what a creep he is; what type of boss spies on employees after work hours? He's not sure why, but it turned into a habit. Perhaps because he wants a relationship like that with someone—someone who can handle his crap, who can laugh at his jokes, who shows affection, who asks how his day has been, and with whom he can have incredible sex.

It's funny because it almost sounds like he's describing Stolas.

He didn't know it right away, but he quickly realized that, of all the demons in hell, he fell in love with Stolas. He was gorgeous, his eyes looked like ruby’s, his smile always made his knee weaken, and his little hoot laughs that he made when he told a horrible joke to him. He knew Stolas was just using him, he knew he had no chance with him because Stolas was a prince, he was a nobody, he was a damn clown, but every full moon, he looked at Stolas with his eyes full of admiration, as the owl speaks about the stars and his plants.

After that, Blitz swiped and found that he was staring at one of Stola's photos that he had taken while the owl was sleeping. Along with ruining Stolas's life, he hurt the life of Stolas's child—what was her name again? Octopus? October? Olivia?

Octavia.

He ruined Stolas's reputation and Octavia’s life, but he knows that he doesn't care one way or the other about Stolas's wife, or current ex wife. Blitz could say that after reading several articles about Stolas divorce, he is happy for him. Though he doesn't know Stolas's wife well, he can tell from the pictures of that bitch that she isn't a good woman.

Blitz then goes to his other favorite picture, the one he took of Loona when he adopted her, which he often looks at when he's feeling down. It was the happiest day of his life; he had given his Looney everything, the love and care she deserved, and the things he had always wanted as a child but had never had.

When he saw the expression on Loona's face, he frowned. He expressed his happiness at adopting his Loona while she was filled with rage. Although he is aware that he is not a shitty dad, he sometimes wishes he had been a better father and wanted to be the kind of father Loona deserves. However, Loona made it clear that he is not her dad and that, contrary to his father, he will never give up on her.

Blitz turned over, lying on his back, his phone turned off, his eyes fixed on the ceiling. He ignored the water leaking down off his ceiling and kept thinking to himself despite it.

He was filled with countless thoughts, but one stuck in his mind like the white scars on his body.

‘Am I going to die alone?’

(I might write a second chapter who knows 🤷‼️)