green queen, black ace | daemon, rhaenyra and vaegon

ix. the ghosts of mothers passed

{if anyone is interested, I have made a playlist on Spotify that is the book's title. It includes many songs that fit this book ;)}

ONE WEEK AFTER the birth of the princesses saw Ceryse standing over their shared crib in the nursery, the duo having wailed any time anyone dared to part them.

The Queen smiled down at them, laying a hand delicately upon her dark-haired daughter's cheek.

"You should return," her knight, Ser Vaegon, insisted from the door. "The Maester said ten days."

Ceryse ignored the Prince entirely, her gaze instead roaming over to the fair-haired Princess Alyssa who blinked up at her.

"You have someone that shares your eyes now, Ser Vaegon," she teased lightly. "A little mirror."

Ser Vaegon did not respond to her, and Ceryse's expression soon cleared of any joy, lost in a thought.

After a moment, she turned to face him hesitantly. "It may not be my place to say this, Ser," she said, feeling the weight of the older man's mismatched eyes upon her own. "But I was thinking about the birth earlier today. I remember thinking I was going to die and- and I just wanted you to know that even when I was sure I must die, that the pain was too much, not once did I blame my child. If I had died, I would have been relieved to know that my child had lived, I would be happy not regretful. I have no doubt that your mother felt the same."

Every muscle of the youngest prince's body was tense, his eyes having moved from Ceryse's face to stare determinedly at the wall. She noted how his fists, too, seemed to be clenched painfully tight at his sides.

It was no secret among the Red Keep that Prince Vaegon had always blamed himself for his mother's death. His brothers hadn't helped, the rumour mill passing on stories where both boys had explicitly blamed Vaegon for Alyssa's demise.

Their mother would be disappointed in them, Ceryse felt sure of that. She would not look kindly upon anyone who blamed Alyssa or Viserra for her passing should she have died, not that anyone would be likely to mourn her bar Laena.

She hoped her father, Alicent, Owyn and Gwayne might be upset, but she would not bet on it. Her father had not seen her after the birth, not even to shout at her, and Alicent seemed as if she would never forgive her. Her brothers barely seemed to think of her at all.

Not wanting to upset him, Ceryse changed the subject. "Could you hold one of your nieces? I want to take one into my arms, but leaving the other alone in the cradle seems wrong."

After a reluctant stretch in which Ser Vaegon did not move a muscle, he finally began to make his way over to the crib.

Ceryse reached in and took Princess Viserra into her arms, leaving Alyssa to gaze up at them both.

Upon reaching the cradle, Ser Vaegon hesitantly reached in, bringing little Alyssa into his arms.

Ceryse watched from the corner of her eyes as he stared down at her, no small amount of awe creeping into his expression as her eldest daughter stared back up at him. He seemed to soften, all sign of the earlier tension seeping from his body.

"My father will be displeased," she confided. "Daughters, and one with dark hair at that and the other with unusual eyes. But I cannot bring myself to feel bad in the slightest."

Ser Vaegon shook his head, offering her his rare speech. "You shouldn't, they're both beautiful. And even if they were not, they're dragons, blood of our blood, and that's all that matters."